Love, In A Clearly Different View
by rivereq
Summary: It was a complete freak accident, falling in love with someone who never wanted love in the first place. That was hard for both of us but admitting we loved each other wasn't the problem, staying together despite everything and everyone against us... AH/OOC (Edited)
1. Chapter 1

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 1:** All went in the fire.

Its night; my favorite time of the day, if that makes any sense. It's not too cold, the wind isn't heavy and the dim lights in this parking lot keep me somewhat hidden. There aren't a lot of cars here and the store seems mutually empty, which is a good thing. My jeans are covered in grease and oil, my shirt in some spots of blood and my hoodie keeps me slightly invisible. My hair was always a concern for me but right now it was as messy as hell and I didn't care.

As I walk the aisle full of tampons and girl products, I get an odd stare from the old lady holding a basket full of toilet paper. I quickly pass the through finding the Band-Aids and gauze, opening a box and quickly stuffing one in my bleeding nose. I sigh at the relief it brings me and stand there, my head hanging back and I just stare at the ceiling as the bright lights shine into my eyes. The pain eases but not very much. The blood is slowing now and I sigh basking in the peace of the grocery store.

'Um, excuse me?' I ignore the voice and close my eyes as the peace quickly fades away. I'm clutching them tightly and trying to save the last bits of calm I'll probably get for the rest of the night. 'Excuse me, you can't open thos-'

I turn to face them and quickly collide with a girl and all the tampon boxes she was holding fall to the floor. 'Der'mo! I'm sorry, I didn't see you there.' I bend to my knees and begin helping her pick up the boxes and keep apologizing.

'It's fine. It's okay, really, they're pads not wine glasses.' she laughs lightly and I let my eyes move up to her face, her big brown eyes somewhat covered by her dark brown bangs shine. The slight smirk of her full natural colored lips and her dark brown hair falling in her face like a wave of a curtain and I'm just staring. 'Are you okay?'

I snap out of my daze and realize I've been staring at her for much too long now. 'Um-yea, yeah. I'm good.'

We stand and she grips the many boxes in her hands and nods with her head in my direction, 'Your nose is bleeding.' I reach up and sure enough my finger comes back with blood. 'Der'mo. Sorry, I was trying to stop it-'

'I came and ran into you, yeah, sorry. My boss saw you on the security camera and I was supposed to tell you not to open the box until you've bought it.' I nod my head and follow her to the aisle ahead. She begins stacking the boxes on the shelf and then when she's done, she takes the ones I'm holding. 'Thanks for the help. If you bring those I can help you at the cash register over there...'

I nod and as she takes the last box from my hands, I go back and grab the box of gauze and make my way to the counter. I swallow nervously and look around the store as I wait in line. The security guard is old and has a beer gut about the size of Sonya's six month pregnant belly, well, the last time I saw it anyway. Through the window outside it looks like the wind has picked up.

The trees move slightly, dropping leaves and as I check for my bike that I've tied to a light pole, I spot _him_. He stands there, in his Dockers and navy blue sweater, looking over my bicycle and judging me. He's alone and from what I'm guessing waiting for me. As usual just his appearance irritates me. My mind blanks and suddenly all my earlier anger rises.

I place the gauze on a magazine shelf and head straight for the exit. As I approach his smile appears and his eyes have an obvious smugness in them. 'Belikov, thought this piece of shit was yours.' He says kicking the bike as I stop in front of him and stand my ground.

'What do you want, Zeklos?' He smiles and nods his head toward the store and that's when I know I'm in trouble.

'Just some reassurance from your old man… You know my fathers a little impatient about his money. So I'm here for some... collateral.' He says with an eerie smile as the three other boys surround me.

I'm alone, in the middle of a parking lot and no one else is around at the moment. It doesn't scare me though; I'll take all four of them on. If I get the shit kicked out of me for it; oh well. I won't back down without a fight and I never have. 'I told you at school that I have nothing to do with that. What your father and my father do is none of my business. I don't care for it and neither should you.'

He shakes his head and laughs as his friends close in on me. I watch all of them carefully, not making any sudden movements until I'm sure they are going to first. 'Does it look like I give a shit about what you said? My dad wants his money and your old man is late, so now _you_ have to deal with me.' It's quiet as they all keep moving around me. They're circling me as if they're sharks and I'm the meal. I keep my fist clenched, my eyes open and my body ready for anything though. 'Think of it as a late fee, Belikov.'

Those were the last words said as all three boys came at me. A tall one, who was about my height, another who was built and a little harder to take down, and the last one was quick. There were fists and legs flying about. I felt hits to my jaw, my stomach and then as I bent over in pain, a kick right to the back of my leg and I fall to the ground. Although, I'm down, I know I've hurt them too.

I got one in the nose and the tall one in the ribs but it wasn't enough. As I'm covering everything I can with my knees to my chest, my back takes kick after kick. My ribs punched over and over and my head met with a steel toe boot of whoever was kicking me.

'Hey!' A soft yet firm yell comes from I don't know where. My head is aching and my cover prevents me from seeing anything other than a shoe or fist. 'Leave him alone! Get the fuck away from him!'

'Ow! What the fuck you stupid bitch?' Now there's only two still hitting me and I hear loud thumps and fast swishes as if someone is swinging something heavy. 'Shit! She's got a fucking bat, watch out!'

Now there's no one touching me anymore and I fade in and out as the pain in my face takes over. The blood from my nose gushes out to the gravel and my ribs make it hard to breathe. 'Get away or I'll smash your balls like grapes. Now! Leave him alone!' I can see a shadow looming over me in a protective stance.

'Fuck! Dude, I think she broke my dick.' A coughing fit begins as I try to open my throbbing eyes and see the tall one on the floor clutching his junk. 'This isn't over, bitch! You fucked with the wrong guy, Belikov!' I hear his distant yell.

'Fuck off, Jesse!' her voice once again sounds. I attempt to breathe and groan at the pain of moving. My nose is bleeding even worse than before and my head just pounds, my back feels like shit too. 'Hey, are you okay?' I roll in pain as my ribs make it hard to answer her. I moan and groan as I try to pick myself up off the floor and get away as quick as I can. 'Hey, maybe you should take it easy, you're hurt pretty bad. I could call an ambulance and we'll get you to the hospital a-'

'No! No, I'm fine.' I manage to say as she touches my side to try and help me up. I hiss in pain. It feels like a giant truck had smashed into me and the simplest things as breathing hurt.

'Sorry, look please let me get you some help.' she says helping me to stand.

'No, no. I'm fine, really, I have to get home anyway.' she doesn't say anything else and my eyes catch the bat in her hands. I finally, after struggling, am able to stand on my own. I use my sweater to clean the blood dripping from my nose and apply pressure. One of my eyes is swollen shut and I'm as dizzy as ever.

'Are you sure you're okay? We should call the cops, they started it I seen it from the store.' I shake my head no and wobble as I turn to search for my bike. 'Where's my bike?' I say before clutching my stomach and spitting blood to the ground.

It's hard to breathe and my head keeps throbbing like some tiny man inside of it has been hitting me with a hammer non-stop. 'It's still there...' I turn to face the pole I've locked it to and attempt to unlock it.

However, bending to my knees hurts worse and my eye is completely closed, which makes it hard to see the tiny numbers on the lock. 'You need help? I can do it for you, just tell me the combination.' I take a deep breath and lean against the cold metal pole as I give her the combination. She unlocks it and I find myself tired and aching everywhere, almost ready to fall over right to the ground.

As the pain and weakness overwhelm me I slightly feel her light touch on my waist. 'Whoa, hey, be careful.' She helps me lean against the pole and removes her apron to clean up my face. Slowly she dabs and pats gently, the white of her apron becoming a deep red and it's getting harder to find a cleaner spot on it.

The quiet surrounds us while she does this. I flinch and try to hold in my groans at the pain. Her eyes steadily watch me, switching from my nose and lip back to my eyes. I couldn't tell what it was she was searching for; if I was okay or something else entirely but I knew these eyes. The girl from the store, the one with the beautiful hair.

'So, no hospital huh? No police either?' her voice low and concerned. It somehow soothes me that she listened and doesn't think I'm crazy. I shake my head no and try to breathe throughout the pain in my body, her gaze envelopes me. 'Can I at least give you a ride home? I don't think it's a good idea for you to ride your bike like this...'

**Rose.**

'So I know it's none of my business but what did you do to piss off Jesse like that?' he slumped in the passenger seat in pain and holds my work apron to his nose.

I've never seen someone endure so much pain and not want help with it. The ride was quiet and intense; he seemed a little hesitant to accept my offer to drive him home but nodded a yes anyway. After helping him in the car and asking Mason to put his bike away in the store, we were on our way to his house. The seatbelt was a no and I kept checking on him every few seconds or so. He didn't have to tell me where it was he lived or what house to stop in front of, I knew.

The whole town knew where he lived, who is father was and the stories about them. The Belikov's weren't exactly a subtle kind of family, especially in a town like this. 'It was my father's doing.' The silence that followed was all I needed to know that he didn't want to say anything else, so I just kept driving.

I nod my head in understanding, keeping my eyes foreword and continuing to drive down the old cracked roads. The night brings out the peacefulness of the town. The wind slightly moves the branches and leaves, and the silence is oddly comfortable. I look to him and then quickly back to the road. I've never in a million years would have thought I'd have _him_ in my car.

'You can just drop me here.' he nods to the park where a bus stop is and begins trying to open the door. His body won't let him though and it kind of scares me a little. 'It's okay, I can take you the whole way.' he shakes his head no at me and I reach for him as he attempts to weakly open the car door once again.

He breathes out in a deep tired sigh and clutches his ribs trying to tame the blood still slowly dripping from his nose. I can tell he's in so much pain, it hurts to just move. 'Look, why don't you just sit and let me take you home... All the way home, as in stopping the car in front of your house and then you exiting when it's not moving?' he turns to me and I see in his eyes what he was trying to say.

His breathing is short and the blood makes me want to not listen to him and drive directly to the hospital. However, his obvious discomfort shows through his eyes and I understand it completely. 'It's not a big deal, okay? Just let me get you home without any more damage.' After a moment of hesitating silence, he nods and then leans back in the passenger seat.

We drive for the next few minutes on the main road in our small town. This side of Montana wasn't exactly a place I would choose to live but it was my father's idea after he and my mother had split up. So here I was, taking care of him and working to save up for college. The radio is playing low as some guy strumming a guitar and singing about his love life surrounds the small Honda. I peek over to the tall silent guy sitting in my passenger seat and wonder what is going through his mind.

Is he worried about what everyone will say at school? What Jesse is going to say and what other stories people are going to spread?

If -at all Dimitri even cares he just got the shit kicked out of him by the most spoiled kid in school. I can't say that I know who exactly he is and what he's going through. I just know his name, where he lives and who his father is but I don't actually know him. Things like why he came in the store with a nose bleed pre Jesse and his jerk friends jumping him. I just keep quiet and continue to drive towards the end of town.

To the little brick house where this mysterious boy lives and all those stories and rumors about him take place.

**Dimitri.**

'How did you know where I lived?' she keeps her eyes to the front of us and shrugs.

'Small town, people talk, I hear things.' I snort a laugh as my nose finally stops bleeding and roll up her apron in my sweater.

It was a bit weird to be riding in a car with her, she wasn't like me, and she hung out with different people at school. We pull up to the house -my own personal hell and the engine cuts off. 'You must hear a lot of things...' she just shrugs again.

'The perks of working at the only grocery store in town.' I nod and wonder what exactly she did hear about me.

It was no secret I was poor, my father was a drunk and we lived on the bad side of town. The quiet isn't awkward or uncomfortable though, it's more of calm, a peace. I stray a little before reaching for the handle of the door and take a deep breath. This is the very last place I want to be. Once I'm in that house everything will be different.

I won't be surrounded by three other guys and she won't be able to help me out of that fight. I guess that's just life with my father though, that's just life for me, something she will never understand. 'Whatever it was about, earlier with Jesse...' We turn to face each other at her voice and I wait for the beautiful girl to talk. 'It's none of my business and I don't mean to pry, but...'

She looks to the dashboard of her car before looking back to me and speaking, 'Whatever that was about, believe it or not, things could be a lot worse. You shouldn't feel bad about what happen out there, you were actually very brave… stupid but brave.' she smiles sadly at me and I can't help but return it with a subtle nod of my own.

After promising to return her apron and thanking her for the ride and help, I make my way into the yard. I turn as she drives off and watch until I no longer can see her lights in the midnight air. The silence that follows is blank and I prepare for another brave act; entering my house. The wind carries a sort of mystery to it. I don't know what kind of man is behind that old wooden door, it could be the man my mother once loved, the one she didn't want to live without.

The man who drinks and is greedy. It's most likely, the man I left in the house earlier right before my grocery store rumble. The angry and bitter monster that gave me the bloody nose and bruised ego I hid so well, the one who hates the very sight of me. The door creeks open and the dark wooden floorboards sink as I press my heavy booted foot onto them. This house is old and falling apart, the windows rattle when big trucks drive by and the plumbing sucks. Then there's my room and it's colder than a winter in Alaska in there.

It was home though and I really didn't have anywhere else. So silently and stealthy, I make my way across the house and pass the living room. The TV is on, the coffee table is piled with bottles and old cigarettes, and my father is passed out on the couch. A sigh of relief releases itself from me unexpectedly and I manage to make it all the way to the bathroom without waking the sleeping beast. The restroom is small and also as rundown as this house.

There's mold caked in the tiles of the shower and the window doesn't shut. After I undress and start the bath, I look at myself in the mirror above the cracked sink and stare. My nose is crooked and fat, my left eye purple and just about swollen shut. My lip bleeding and chin scraped, and then my eyes wonder to my ribs and stomach. My sides are purple with spots from their boots and hurt whenever I breathe deeply.

My eyes water at the very sight and anger runs in my veins. The last time I was this bruised and battered, she was alive. My mother had just helped me into the bath and as soon as I flinched from the heat of the water pressing against my sore skin, she began apologizing in Russian, telling me she was sorry for being so weak, for letting him hurt me. The anger I felt that day was beyond anything I've ever felt in my life. That was the last time he ever put his hands on us expecting no one to fight back.

After that I decided he wouldn't get away with it anymore. Thinking it would change things in my favor -and my mother's it just made them worse. The water running in the bathtub snaps me out of my memories and so I strip, sitting to relax in the heat of the water. The warmth makes it a little easier to breathe and washes away the blood. I'll have to go see if Eddie can get his aunt to help fix me up again.

And that usually means more questions and concerns, Eddie telling me I should just tell someone and see what happens. How I wish things were that easy, kind of like the smile Rose gave me as she thanked me for helping her at the store earlier or when she tried to make me feel better. She never had to tell me her name, I knew who she was. I close my eyes and see the concern and worry in her eyes as she cleaned me up out in the parking lot. The help she gave willingly and didn't judge or question me after doing so.

It was funny how I seen her in school, smiling and laughing with all of her popular friends but when she was by herself, she was different. She seemed more caring and kind, eager to help someone like me. It was like my mama used to say; _you think you know people_.

**Rose.**

I close and lock the car, sighing as I make my way to the house and try to be quiet. The front door has a note from Lissa; _Mom wanted to make sure Abe ate something other than that weird Turkish thing you guys pass as food. She says you're welcome and if you need anything- Well, you know the drill. You're welcome, love Liss._

I open the door and see the living room lamp on, 'Pop, why are you still up?' he shrugs and continues watching some lions eat a zebra on Animal Planet.

The couch is Abe's sanctuary; sometimes I think if he could he would physically attach himself to it. 'It's a documentary about wildlife, you should watch it, and you might learn something.' I plop myself on the recliner next to the sofa and sigh.

The room is quiet while we watch the lions stuff their faces full of bloody zebra. It sort of reminds me of what happen earlier with Dimitri and Jesse. 'What's on your mind, kiz?' I snap out of my thoughts and look to my father, shaking my head and blowing off his question. So his focus returns to the TV, his body comfortably relaxing on our old leather couch. It's amazing that he looks as though there's nothing wrong with him.

As if he's just this fifty year old man lounging on the couch in his bathrobe and underwear. It's like he's not even sick or in any kind of pain. As I sit here though, I know it's not true; he's in constant pain and the pills help but not with everything. I sigh and turn back to the TV catching the lions ripping a piece of meat from the zebra's carcass. 'Ew, old man, that's gross. Why are you watching this?'

I get up and make my way to the coffee table, cleaning up his dishes and shaking my head at him before reaching the kitchen. He just laughs and continues watching as I clean up. 'What did Rhea make you for dinner?' he groans. 'Some weird salad thing, it's in the fridge if you want it. I kept it wrapped for you.' his amused voice makes me smile but he's right; It did look weird.

Our house is only two bedrooms, kind of small and on the not so rich side of town but is ours. Abe bought it before I was born, he and Janine were supposed to raise me in it but that didn't exactly work out. My room was the biggest. Abe thought I deserved it since I worked so hard and "thought I was the parent" his words not mine.

The room was white and had pictures everywhere all over the walls. Ones of me and my friends, of me and my father, or ones I took at random. My bed was my favorite part of the room right now though and as I lay there, I couldn't help but think of the boy who I had helped earlier tonight. The rumors and stories I heard at the grocery store or in school, well, they weren't very nice ones. Vladimir Belikov had a reputation of a drunk among other things, someone you didn't get too close to and so by association -and mere bad luck with DNA Dimitri got a reputation as well.

One that I now think may not fit him because there was something in his eyes as I helped him get home tonight. I'm not sure what it was or why I find myself so interested in him all of a sudden. But as I fell asleep in my comfortable bed, I couldn't help but wonder just who the anti-social guy I got a glimpse of was and will I ever get that chance again?


	2. Chapter 2

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 2: **Quiet like you, violent like you.

The morning is bright as my eyes snap open to the familiar sounds of my father going about the house. The window let's in a breeze that causes goose bumps to rise along my skin. The ache as I reach to cover my naked chest with a blanket burns throughout my whole body. My breath catches as I hold back a groan from releasing itself and try not to let my father know I'm awake, he's the last thing I want to endure right now. I breathe in slow and deep, ignoring the sharp shooting pain in my ribs as I lie back down and close my eyes.

It looks as though going to school is out of the question, there would be concerns and teachers wanting to know things and I couldn't risk it. I'm sure Zeklos would have lots of rumors surrounding the campus by lunch and make it out to be something it's not. So I just lay there for what seems like a lifetime but I know it's only been a few minutes as his footsteps sound closer. Then under my door there are two shadowing figures and as I prepare myself to look as if nothing is wrong; the door swings open at full force with a loud thumping crash against the wall. 'Why aren't you at school, boy?'

I look to him and shrug, his heavy thick accent echoed throughout the room, 'It hasn't started yet.' he scowls at me and walks closer to my bed. The smell of whiskey and cigars envelopes my nostrils and I try to avoid his lingering eyes. 'Don't you lie to me, boy!' he stands there glaring and before I'm ready for it he rips the covers off of my body and smirks.

I scowl at his widening smile and sit up, trying to hold back the visible pain from him, 'What happen to you?' he says amusedly. 'Nothing.' I say, holding back the groans I want to let out at the pain swimming through my body. He smirks again before laughing lowly; 'It doesn't look like nothing to me, it looks like you had your ass handed to you.' he smiles in what looks to be triumph.

'No thanks to you.' I mumble getting up from the bed a little too quickly and holding back the tears from all the pain I'm in.

This makes him go still for a minute and I know I've done something wrong, he just stands there, in the middle of my small room wearing his boots and uniform, holding his cigar while an evil glare escapes him. I take deep slow breaths in attempt to calm the pain and anger ready to explode from my body and stand on the other side of my bed. He takes some steps closer to me and now is directly in front of my face releasing the smoke from his cigar, and hits me right in the face. I never let him faze me though; I've been beaten worse than this before, by the very man standing in front of me. 'What did you say? No thanks to who?' his breath reeks of cigar and hot whiskey.

He's angry and the space between us is so intense that I fight not to look away. I swallow hard and clench my fist ready to swing if he does. It's like all I do is defend myself, my whole life has become this fight to the death, from the moment I wake up to the second I fall asleep. The very reason for it stands before me, watching me with his haunting eyes and waiting for me to appear weak just so he can take the advantage. I try to stay calm but on alert as I explain what happen, 'Zeklos wants his money, his kid and some other boys jumped me last night.'

He nods his head and takes a few steps back to inhale his cigar again, it's still quiet and intense but my defense never falters. He lingers in the room, his eyes looking over everything in it; over the picture on my night stand of my sisters and nephew. 'So this is my fault then, you're crying because some boys beat you up and told you to tell me about some money nonsense?'

I snap and quickly regret my next words, 'Does it look like I'm crying? I was just passing the message!' and then in a flash, as I expected it would be, his hand is clutched around my neck and he squeezes as he pounds my already aching head against the wall. The picture -the only one I have falls to the floor from the impact and he blows out his smoke on my face again. 'If I needed a messenger, boy, I would've had gotten one!' he sneers at me.

But just before he can do it again, I take the opportunity to try to shove him away, his hands swipe at me as I break his hold and for a few seconds we scuffle. We both were trying to push the other away from ourselves but in my attempt, I leave myself unguarded and he uses his whole strength to punch my ribs. I curse at the pressure and pain, and he once again shoves me hard against the wall. I fall leaning against it and groan at the pulsing pain flowing through my body. 'I told you to stay out of trouble! To stay out of my way!' He yells glaring in rage at me, 'You get your worthless ass cleaned up, and then get to work and I don't want to see your stupid face for the rest of the day!'

With one last shove to the wall, he leaves my room in an angry stomp and the front door slams shut. I sink to the floor in pain and agony. It's harder to breathe now and my eyes water at the struggle to get myself up, to do something as simple as stand. I take a few moments to calm myself and breathe, let the anger fade. I should've known he'd find a way to turn this around on me.

It was always my fault, Zeklos was after him and I'm the one getting beat up for something my father did! It was really nothing new here though, I knew to expect nothing less of this but it still sucked. After a while I somehow get dressed in my work uniform. I call Eddie and on my way through the house, I stop in my father's room and as routine, take the money from his stash in his drawers and leave the house as fast as possible. 'So what was it this time, fell off your bike? Tripped down those imaginary stairs in your house?'

I roll my eyes at Eddie's remarks and follow him through the back door of the clinic. This place smells like rubber gloves and plastic, the few nurses here already know me and smile sadly at my presence. They all know how this goes, I come in, and it usually means my father had something to do with it. No one asks questions or says anything and they're all very polite to me. I know it's only cause of Alberta though; they pity me with their fake smiles and fake conversation.

They act like they care but if they did, they've done nothing to show it and it's not exactly like I've let them. 'Actually, I got jumped last night.' Eddie turns around as we continue towards his aunt's office and shakes his head sighing, 'And let me guess, you didn't get a good look at the guy?'

I smile as he looks back to me again before leading me down a familiar hallway. 'No. I know who it was but like I'm going to tell you anything.'

Eddie shakes his head again, 'As usual, you know one day you're going to come in here and beg my aunt to help you out. Or you'll come in here in a body bag.' I laugh at his honesty and as we approach the inside of Alberta's office, I watch as her face falls in disappointment when I enter the room.

Alberta Petrov was the only doctor I could trust in this small town because unlike the many that worked at the hospital, she didn't ask questions about my coming in every other day to get patched up. She shakes her head in disappointment and beckons me forth with her finger, 'I'd ask what happen but it's not like I'm going to get anywhere, right?' I nod once and pull open the chair in front of her desk. 'Where does it hurt?' she asks watching as I slowly lower myself onto the chair. 'Everywhere.' I reply.

Eddie snorts a laugh and begins readying Alberta's station, he pulls out gauze and bottles of liquid to clean my cuts, wraps and tape make their way on the table as well. I stand and remove my shirt at Alberta's gesture and watch her eyes bug out of her head. 'Geez, Belikov, join a fight club?' I take a deep breath at the pain in my ribs after lifting my arms and reply to Eddie, 'I'd laugh but it hurts too much.' Alberta begins to examine me and tells me to keep taking deep breaths.

After that and a short lecture on trying to take it easy for a couple of days, she begins wrapping my ribs but I know it isn't long until another "warning" comes. 'Edison, give us a minute please.' Eddie just gives me pointed look to say I better have a good excuse this time and then silently leaves the room. Alberta continues to bandage and wrap me as she releases a tired sigh. 'You know, Dimitri, certain laws and codes give me the right to notify child protective services and as I told you the last time this happen, I won't hold back from doing so.'

I sigh deeply and avoid her penetrating gaze; Alberta and my father were once friends, back before a money situation went bad between them. The first time my father beat me up so bad that I needed medical attention, I came to her and she promised she wouldn't say anything. However, that promise was also Alberta's way of having some kind of leverage over my father for what he did to her husband and their life savings. I'm not too sure about all the details but I know she's racking up my visits and keeping score. So I clear my throat and try my best to ease the situation, 'It wasn't him this time.'

The silence tells me she doesn't believe me and if that's my excuse; I better come up with a better one. I take another deep breath and avoid any eye contact with her still. When I remember last night, the only thing clear to me was the look of concern in Rose's eyes. It wasn't the blood or the pain or all three boys hitting and kicking me. It wasn't even the tiring struggle to fight back; it was just her; her and those beautiful brown eyes. 'Well?'

I clear my throat again to snap me out of the daze, 'I was in the grocery store and I was getting ready to pay for some things. So as I'm standing in line, I noticed some guy outside and he's standing next to my bike.' her eyes stay on me and I'm positive she knows I'm not going to give her all the details, just the ones I can without giving too much away. 'I went out to see what was wrong because I thought maybe he was trying to steal it, you know? So, I'm out there in the parking lot and the next thing I know, a few more guys surround me… And before I know it, I'm swinging at them and they're swinging at me. And then I'm on the ground but they keep attacking me.'

Alberta finally stops bandaging me up and then proceeds to hand me a paper with a prescription on it for some pain meds. 'How long were you on the ground and did you black out or anything?' I shake my head no and touch the fresh bandage under my chin. 'The pills are for the pain and not anything else. I don't know how you got out of that one, Dimitri, but you're very lucky… You and Camille both.' I take a moment to collect my thoughts as they flash back to Rose.

The chance she took going out there and risking her own safety for a complete stranger, for _me_, no less. I didn't get it, why would someone like her put themselves in that position? All the times I've ever gotten into fights with my father or anyone else and there were people around, no one had ever helped me out like that. It drove me crazy just thinking what was going through her head at that moment in time. 'Someone had helped me… they went after one of the guys with a baseball bat.' I say in thought but Alberta doesn't miss the chance to gain info.

'Did you see who it was?' I shake my head no, looking to her and watching her eyes settle in disappointment. 'No, I didn't. I couldn't see very well from the floor, I just heard them.' Alberta was right of course; I was very lucky Rose helped me but I still wonder why.

**…**

_'How did you know where I lived?' she keeps her eyes to the front of us and just shrugs. 'Small town, people talk, I hear things.' I snort a laugh as my nose finally stops bleeding and I roll up her apron in my sweater. It was a bit weird to be riding in a car with her, she wasn't like me. She hung out with different people at school, mostly the popular people._

_We pull up to the house -my own personal hell and the engine cuts off, 'You must hear a lot of things?' I say and she once again shrugs. 'The perks of working at the only grocery store in town, I guess.'_

_I nod and wonder what exactly it was that she had heard about me. It was no secret I was poor, my father was a drunk and not a lot of people liked us. The quiet isn't awkward or uncomfortable; it's more of calm, a peace. I stray a little before reaching for the handle of the door and take a deep breath. This is the last place I wanted to be; once I'm in that house everything will be different. I won't be surrounded by three other guys and she won't be able to help me out of that fight._

_I guess that's just life with my father though or maybe that's just life for me. I didn't know but I knew it was something she or anyone else will never understand. 'Whatever it was about…' she says just as I'm about to open the door, 'Your fight with Jesse…' We turn to face each other as her voice sounds again and I wait for the beautiful girl to talk. 'It's none of my business and I don't mean to pry, but...' she looks to the dashboard before looking back to me and continues._

_'Whatever that was about, believe it or not, things could be a lot worse. You shouldn't feel bad about what happen out there, you were actually very brave. Stupid but brave.' she smiles sadly at me and I can't help but return it with a nod of my own._

**Rose.**

'So you actually talked to _the_ Dimitri Belikov?' I nod as I open a box full of canned beans and tomato sauce, pricing them with my price tag gun thingy to stack them on the shelf.

'And I gave him a ride home.' Lissa looks at me with a confused and somewhat shocked expression. It was kind of bothering me as she sat there and stared wide eyed at me as if i did something wrong. 'What?' I ask.

She just shakes her head in disbelief, 'Nothing, I just- I don't know, don't you think that's a little… maybe, weird?' I shrug and continue working not thinking it's as big a deal as Liss seems to. 'I mean, it's _Dimitri Belikov_, Rose, he's like weird and quiet and… weird.'

I laugh at her choice of words and shake my head. 'I don't see what the big deal is, the guy needed help. I mean they were kicking his ass, I couldn't just leave him there and go on about my day.'

'Well, why not?' I snap my gaze to her and watch as she picks up cans and pretends to read them and puts them back in the wrong spot, something I'll have to fix later. I scoff, 'Liss, just because the guy is a little weird doesn't mean I can't help him. What if it was Christian and I just blew him off, you wouldn't be saying anything then.' Now she scoffs, 'That's different!' I laugh surprised at her reaction, 'How exactly?'

'Well, because… because although Christian _is_ weird, he isn't Dimitri.' I once again look back to her in surprise and what kind of logic is that?

'And why is Dimitri being Dimitri any reason not to help him?' she just shrugs as if it's obvious or something. 'Because, Rose, he's- he's just- it's just you've heard all those things about him, right? What if he tried something on you or what if those guys retaliate and you end up involved in some gang rumble or something?' I laugh at her worry as she just glares at me. 'It wasn't that big a deal, he needed help and so I helped him that was It.' she just shakes her head and rolls her eyes at me.

I really didn't see what the problem was helping the guy, so he's gotten into some trouble before and there all these rumors about him. If it were me I'd want someone to help. 'Whatever. Anyway, for my birthday we're thinking maybe the lake or Eddie said he can get his aunts cabin for the night.' Liss goes on and on as I keep working but in the back of my mind, I didn't see what all the fuss was about with Dimitri.

Lissa and I have been best friends since we were in diapees. Our fathers were once in business together, before Abe had gotten sick and my mother left. So we were basically like sisters since then, now I love the girl and everything but sometimes she could talk forever and I still had a lot of work to do. 'Then his aunt got home and that was so awkward! We had to like hurry and get dressed before she walked in the living room and caught us, you know? And I was right in the middle of giving him-' before she can say anything else I cover my ears almost dropping a can of beans on my foot.

'Okay! Okay, I don't want to know what you were giving him. TMI, Liss!' she just shrugs as I try to rid the horrid picture she's just given me from my mind. Gross!

'So, anyway, you're not working this weekend right?' I shrug and begin unpacking another box of can foods as Lissa stands and smacks her lips at me. 'Rose! You have to go! It's my birthday and you're my best friend!'

'I know that, Liss, it just depends if I am working and how the old man is doing. I can't just leave him for the weekend and go get drunk while he stuck at home feeling sick.' Lissa stands next to me in quiet thought and I resume tagging cans and stocking them.

The quiet is kind of familiar, not in a bad sense but I now at any minute Lissa will have some master plan of how I can go and not feel bad about leaving Abe behind. 'You know, we could hire someone to take care of him for the weekend. The hospital sends out nurses to Mia's grandmother all the time, I'm sure if we make some kind of arrangement, they can do it for Abe.' She was right, they could and I'm grateful for the thought but unlike Lissa and Mia, I don't have the money to hire anyone to take care of anything.

Lissa sometimes forgets though, not all of us can drop everything and go spend obscene amounts of money on a nurse and blow it off as no big deal. Although I love Liss and her family, they've offered a couple of times to help me pay for in care services for Abe. But Abe and I have a lot in common about free handouts and doing things on our own, so I didn't even mention to my father that the Dragomir's have offered this deal about four times already. 'Liss, you know as well as I do that even if I could afford to hire someone, Abe would never go for it. Besides we need all the time together we can get.' with that said, she drops the subject and centers on another one.

'He still hasn't changed his mind, huh?' I shake my head no and continue working in order to push back the ugly thoughts that surface whenever I think of this particular subject. Lissa seems to pick up my silence as well, I didn't want to think of things like that right now but she couldn't help her sometimes annoying habit of talking. 'You know, maybe my dad can convince him to- you know, not do that thing we don't speak of?' I just shrug and say nothing.

It's hard enough to convince Abe to take his meds but asking him to do something that he already made his mind up about was no use. He was a stubborn man my father and the apple didn't fall far from the tree. 'I don't think it matters who tries to change his mind, its set. That's that.' A sad silence occurs between us and I try to keep working in order to not think about the inevitable. The one thing I fear the most.

After a while though she lightens things up with talking about her birthday and relationship, and then Lissa leaves before my lunch break. I have lunch with Mason every day since we have pretty much the same shifts. Mason was my boss's son and in my English class, we were good friends and at one point, he had a major crush on me. When we tried to go further with our relationship though, it just didn't click or whatever. He was a nice guy and made me laugh and work was fun with him around.

However, when I would kiss him or he would hold my hand; I don't know… We just didn't have that spark. We usually ate lunch out in the back on the old wooden benches. I'd usually take this time to multi-task and get my homework done so I didn't have to do it at home. 'Hey, so that fight was pretty crazy last night, Right?' I nod at him and finish off some French fries with my head in the books. 'So, do you like, know you know him?'

'Who?' I say without looking at him. 'That guy, the one who got his ass kicked.' he says.

My head snaps up to meet his eyes at those words though, 'You mean, Dimitri?' Mason nods and continues eating casually as I ponder how to answer the question. I didn't really know Dimitri Belikov, I mean who did?

The stories and rumors that spread about him; of course, who didn't know those things. However I didn't actually know him, I knew of him which is a huge difference. So with a shrug I just go back to my book, 'Not really. I mean he's in Alto's class with me but we don't actually talk are anything before last night.' Mason nods again but there's some confusion in the quiet that follows. 'What?' I question and he shakes his head no trying to avoid my eyes. 'Mase, just say it.'

He sighs and drops his burger onto his plate with a plop, looking up to me with a serious and questionable gaze he asks, 'Why did you help him then? I mean I'm well aware of his reputation too, but I'm not exactly going to involve myself in his trouble. It was noble and everything but he's a troublemaker, Rose, he probably deserved it and you're over here playing super clerk.' I watch as Mason goes back to eating and wonder what he was getting at.

Why was it such a big deal helping out someone who was in trouble? If it were me I'd want someone to help me out, reputation or not, that shouldn't have a say in the matter. 'I was just trying to help the guy out, why is that such a big deal? And _super clerk_, really?' he just shrugs and keeps avoiding my eyes, knowing I was irritated with what he said.

After a few silent minutes, I have yet to look away from him and I can tell he's uncomfortable. 'It's not a big deal; it's just that guy is always in a fight with someone. I'm sure he'll probably get into it again sometime today but-'

'You're being kind of quick to judge, no?' he shrugs again at my interruption and begins cleaning up his food.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say that he was jealous or something along those lines and I didn't understand it. I don't know why or what the problem was with me helping Dimitri out, first Lissa and now Mason? 'Hey, so you going to Lissa's party this weekend?' He tries to change the subject to a nice matter and get me to forget everything. And I do, I let myself blow it to the back of my mind because this was no big deal, it's not like I'm going to go and hang out with the guy or something. So, I let it go and lunch carries on as normal.

Work goes by slowly, mostly because on Friday's our shifts seem to last all freaking day long. After a short call to check on Abe, I make my way to the bread aisle. The store is about to close and there's only a few people left in it. After lunch, Mason got over my "act of heroism" and we both individually decided to stop questioning it. He was one of my best friends but his over protectiveness and judgment of others could sometimes be smothering.

'Rose!' Mason's voice snaps me out of my focus and I look to see him standing there quickly noticing who was behind him. 'Someone to see you, he wants his bike back.' A moment of awkward silence flows through us as Mason stands there waiting, for what I don't know, but directly behind him Dimitri stood and we're all looking at each other. Awkwardly.

'Okay, I'm going to go get it and then I'll be _right_ back.' Mason says as he walks away and leaves me and Dimitri there alone. So, not knowing what to do or say for that matter, I wing it. 'Hey, I didn't see you in school today. I usually see you in Alto's class.' he nods and points to his face, 'I went to the doctor.' right, hence the bandages, Rose.

I nod and resume my work as he slowly steps closer to where I'm at. From my peripheral view, I can see his form look around the store. He's tall, really tall and his blue pants and button up shirt are stained in grease and oil. The trucker hat clipped to his jeans is also full of grease and the logo reads Tanner Towing & Parts. How he got up to go to the doctor or even work for that matter, surprises me. I saw what Jesse and his asshole friends did and that wasn't exactly something you just get up walk away from.

Now Dimitri was always good looking, every girl at school noticed that but that didn't mean they were actually going to go up to him and become friends or whatever. I often thought about what it would be like to actually know him, not the rumors and stories out there everyone else spread but the quiet guy who sits in class and doesn't say a word to anyone. The guy who sits in the cafeteria, sometimes with Eddie but mostly by himself and reads? To know this tough, tall, troubled and mysterious boy who hasn't been far from my thoughts since last night and what he really is like.

He steps closer slowly, almost as if he is afraid to come too close, and the smell of oil and musk hit me like a slap in the face. A white and red cloth catches my eye and I turn towards him, 'This is yours.' I reach out and take my work apron from him, unfolding it and noticing the blood stains are gone. 'I-uh, I washed it.'

'Oh, thank you! You didn't have to that.' he shrugged and stuffs his hands inside his pockets, shifting from foot to foot.

Another moment of silence occurs and I find it hard to voice the questions surrounding my mind. The bandages on his nose and chin don't seem to take away how flawless and chiseled his face is. His hair he usually wore to his shoulders was tied back into a ponytail at the nape of his neck and his smell of musk and grease was somehow entrancing to me but those eyes... His eyes were a deep brown and had so many things hidden in them that I found it hard to look away. I caught myself staring and the silence between us was somehow shifting from awkward to oddly comfortable.

He watched as I stared at him, until realized what I was doing and quickly went back to work. He stood there and watched as I worked but turned away as I our eyes met a few times. A clearing of a throat snapped us both out of the weird trance and I see Mason holding a bike at the end of the aisle impatiently. 'Here you go, dude. The stores closing now, so sorry, but you have to go now.' I roll my eyes at Mason's attempt to sound tough and go back to work.

Dimitri nods once and takes his bicycle from Mason. I watch as they exchange looks of I don't know what but Mason quickly looks away and clears his throat again fidgeting and then suddenly deciding to walk away quickly. I laugh lowly and return to stacking the bread on the shelves. 'Is he okay?' I turn my attention back to the sound of his accented voice. Everyone knew he was born in Russia, since being introduced way back when he first moved here, but his accent had also given it away.

I found it sort of weird how I wanted to hear him talk again; I liked the sound of his voice. 'Yeah, he'll be fine. I think you intimidate him, so he wanted to look tough or something.' He nods and I think to just go back to work.

But then I get this really stupid odd idea and before I know it, as he turns his bike to walk away, I call out to him. 'Hey?' he stops and turns watching me as I struggle to make sense of what it is I'm actually doing. 'Um, I-I was wondering if-if you wanted to um… to get something to eat, with me, in like an hour or so?'

He didn't speak or move, he did nothing for what felt like ever. He just stood there for a good long minute, actually what seemed like the longest minute of my life and a thousand thoughts sparked through my head all at once. What the hell was I doing and what the hell is wrong with me? But then finally, with a short nod of his head my rambling thoughts stopped. He agreed.

'Okay. Okay, I get off in an hour if you'll wait?' Once again he gives me another short nod and I turn back to stacking bread and think to myself; what did I just do?

**...**

As soon as we walk in the diner there are a few stares and whispers but Dimitri ignores them -as I'm sure he's grown accustom to. But for some odd reason I find myself annoyed with the people judging him from afar. 'Is there a certain place you'd like to sit?'

I stop glaring at the not so hidden stares of the few people in the diner and snap my attention to the tall quiet guy standing next to me, 'What?'

He looks up and searches throughout the diner while asking me again if there's a place I'd like to sit. We end up sitting in a booth next to the window. As soon as we sit, the waitress greets us and takes our drink orders and that's where the awkward silence begins. The both of us searching the menus as if it's a Where's Waldo tournament and the stares and whispering begin to fade. I decide to break the ice and strike some conversation.

After all I was the one who spontaneously asked him to dinner, it was the least I could do. I take a deep breath and look to the handsome stranger before me, it's a little weird how we've been in the same school for some odd years now and we barely know each others name. 'So, you don't talk much do you?'

It feels like forever that he sits there quietly observing the menu but after all the silence he finally looks up to me. 'Nope.' And then after he speaks, he immediately goes back to the menu and another blanket of silence covers us.


	3. Chapter 3

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 3: **So let me keep my eyes closed.

The diner was quiet as were we but a few moments later and I couldn't stand the quiet anymore. 'It's kind of weird don't you think?' I let a small smile show itself but his eyes stay on the laminated paper as he answered, 'What?'

Well at least he's talking back, a little. 'How you only speak a few words but yet there's about a ton of rumors and stories about you all around school and town…'

The silence once again graces us with its presence but it's shortly cut by him putting the menu down and letting his eyes wonder around the diner while he answers me. 'I don't really pay attention to those things.' he shrugs and blows it off as I just nod.

Although I understand him ignoring all the bullshit this town and its people can bring, my curiosity sneaks up and gets the better of me. 'Are any of them true?' his eyes snap to mine and for a second they linger but shortly after their back on the table and he just shrugs. 'I doubt it.'

I nod again and the waitress returns with our drinks, 'What about the one about you and your dad being Russian mafia?' I ask in an attempt to lighten the mood and he lets a ghost of a smile grace his firm lips but shakes his head, 'No. No we're from Russia but we're not mafia or anything.'

I nod, 'And the one about your mom?' his whole body tenses, his eyes squint and reveal a look of guilt and worry, but they quickly blank as he stares at me.

The question hit like a bullet, sudden and the quiet tension washes over the whole room it seems, but he never once looks away from me. The look in his eyes scares me, it scares me so much I think I know how Mason felt earlier at the store. I swallow and try to hide the embarrassment of the most stupidest question I've ever asked. My embarrassment quickly fades as he rises from his booth and quickly puts his sweater on, 'I have to go.' he snaps at me and then attempts to walk away. Not knowing what to do, I stand too and reach for his arm as he passes me, 'Wait! Wait, don't go!'

He stops and glares at my arm that is clutching his and I hastily move it to my side, his intense gaze makes its way to mine and I swallow the biggest lump in my throat ever. 'I'm-I'm sorry, okay? That was out of line and rude. I apologize.' he stares.

He just stands there and stares as I hope and pray he isn't going to punch me or something any minute now. The silence of the diner is suffocating as I'm sure everyone in here is also staring. Great, more stories to spread, 'I'm sorry, okay-'

'What do you want from me?!' his voice was low and heavy with anger; it makes me jump as soon as I hear it. The question he asks however stumps me, what did_ I_ want from him? He already said thank you for last night and he even brought my apron back all washed and neatly folded. What was I expecting from this out of the blue dinner, for us to become friends?

'I just- I just wanted to talk to-' he interrupts before I can finish. 'So you could question me? Is that why you brought me here, to play nice and think I owe you something?' I shake my head no to him and look around to spot some people still staring in our direction. 'Can you lower your voice, people are staring?'

He flares, 'I don't give a shit! What is it that you want from me?' As lame as it is, my excuse was actually true, well, maybe half true. 'To get to know you… and I didn't- I didn't want to eat alone.' his eyes soften, his posture relaxes and his deep sigh tells me he's trying to keep calm.

I didn't want to be vulnerable or look like some dumb lonely girl in front of him but I couldn't think of anything else to keep him here, anything but the truth. A few minutes later we're both sitting and waiting for the waitress to return with our food. No one was staring anymore and I was glad that he decided to stay with me. I mean I probably looked kind of pathetic, blushing as he watched me sound like some five year old and beg not to be left alone. None the less, he gave in and now we're here, quiet, tense and hungry.

'I thought you had friends for this sort of thing?' I keep my eyes to the dark table and avoid his gaze. 'They're busy with their own lives… and my dad is already asleep, so…' he laughs lowly, almost as if he couldn't believe it. 'So, I'm your last option?'

The question hits me and I feel bad, I didn't want him to think I was using him like that or any other way. 'No, Mason was but he gets annoying after a while and I don't really feel like hearing him ramble about how hot Avery is.' I say with a roll of my eyes.

'Well, she is hot.' I look to him and see a playful look in his eyes as he smirks lightly.

**...**

'What about all the other ones? Doesn't it bother you that people talk about you and your dad like that?' he shakes his head no and then looks out toward the window into the late night.

Once again, my curiosity gets the best of me, for some odd reason I can't get my mind to stop coming up with dumb questions and the thought of just wanting to hear him talk makes me continue interrogating him. 'Don't you care what people think about you or them knowing the truth?' he shrugs keeping his eyes looking outside through the window. 'Not really, I came here with no one knowing me and I like being alone. They just make it easier… no one will get hurt or be disappointed.'

We've been sitting here for a while now, eating and talking like two old friends. Okay, well, I asked question after question and he answered them as best he could. A few times I would catch his avoidance of the topic of his father, he would have one worded answers or just shake his head. Other times he talked willingly, like when I asked about what Russia was like and if he would ever go back. He seemed to miss it a lot, like if he left something there and would never see it again.

Then there were answers like this one, the glum, broodiness of how he liked being alone and didn't care that everyone thought he was this or that. His words take me by surprise, that and the fact that this was the longest he's talked so far, 'Well that's a little dark and depressing, no?' he shrugs again and turns to me, 'Are you done interrogating me, now?'

I look up from pouring a mountain of sugar in my tea, he smiles smugly and although it wasn't this wide as ever smiles, and it was still amazing to see. I look back down to the table as the waitress returns with our check and shake my head in embarrassment, 'Sorry.' He laughs it off and eats some fries and it was one of the sexiest things I've ever seen.

His jaw muscles flex and his smirk stayed on his face as he chewed, and I found myself captured by the movement of his face. 'I see you at school; you hang out with all the rich snotty kids, right?' In the middle of my nod, I catch his snide remark and look to him. He doesn't look up from his plate though and just plays with his leftovers.

'That's a little judgmental don't you think? I mean, just cause you don't care what people think about you, that doesn't mean they don't.' he avoids my eyes and shrugs again.

Although he is really hot, he did kind of sound like a jerk just now. 'Do you _know_ any of my friends?' he shakes his head no and looks directly at me as if challenging me. But his eyes are blank and it only annoys me a little more, 'So then why act like you do?' he just shrugs, again.

'Just from what I've seen and heard I'm not the only one who gets talked about or has rumors circling the town.' Touché.

'True but not all of us talk about or believe the stories going around. So maybe you should give other people the benefit of the doubt.' My voice comes out in a firm tone, his eyes widen as he takes in my serious expression and I'm ready for his next remark, but it doesn't come.

Instead his eyes shift into a softer look and he looks to his plate in what I think is shame. He swallows and looks back up to me and in the sincerest look I've seen on anyone; he apologizes. 'I didn't mean to upset or offend you about that. I apologize if I did but you were interrogating me a bit and I thought I would do it back, but I was wrong. I'm sorry.' So taking a page out of his book, I just shrug.

'It's not a big deal but why don't you like them?' he shrugs and folds his arms across his chest. 'I don't not like all of them, just some.' I laugh at his answer, thankful for the lightening of the conversation.

'Well, which some?' he shrugs and drinks his soda, acting all nonchalant before answering. 'So far? You're the only one I do like.' I didn't know how exactly to take that, so I just nod and look around to avoid his gaze noticing we're pretty much the only ones left in the diner.

We finish at the diner and he walks me to my car across the street in the grocery store parking lot. We walk in a comfortable silence and my thoughts keep returning to what happen last night. It was a subject we seemed to avoid while eating but now that were here, I can't help but ask; 'Um, so, how's your nose and stu-' he didn't even let me finish before speaking.

'Why did you help me?' his question cuts off my own and we come to an abrupt stop just before my car.

The look in his eyes is determined and confusion role around in them as well, 'Last night, with Jesse and his friends, why did you- why did you even bother?' his voice sounded so vulnerable and sure at the same time. It was hard to explain the look in his eyes, like he truly couldn't believe that someone had actually helped him.

'Well, why not?' I shrug as his eyebrow shoots up and he looks at me, like he didn't believe someone would something so simple or maybe put it so simply. 'Not everyone would do something like that especially for someone like me.' I shrug and watch as his eyes gaze at me. 'Well, I'm not everyone... and I don't know, if that were to happen to me I'd like someone to help me out, you know?' He nods and opens his mouth to say something else but quickly closes it and turns to walk the rest of the way to my car.

'Um, if you don't mind me asking because it's none of my business, but what was that fight about exactly?' he looks down to his feet and once again his hands end up in his pockets.

A habit that occurs when he's uncomfortable I take it but as we are now at my car, I don't open the door waiting for him to come up with an answer. He shrugs and looks out to the empty lot, 'You don't want to know. It's kind of stupid actually.' his voice is soft and he seems vulnerable again.

It does something to me and before I know it; I reach out and trace the band aid over his nose that had started to peel off. His eyes snap to mine and a moment passes where there's nothing but him and me. The night is silent, the air cold and wind soft, and I watch his eyes as he takes me in. 'Does it hurt?' I ask softly as I trace over his band aid lightly, he swallows deeply and shakes his head. 'Not right now.'

I still at the tone of softness in his voice, there it was again that feeling where he made me think he was flirting with me or something but I pull my hand back and we stare at each other for a few lingering seconds.

**Dimitri.**

The evening sky was illuminating as I dug around these old trucks for another spare part. My work day was almost over and my ribs were still sore from my unfortunate encounter with Zeklos and home was actually looking like a good place to be right now, and I _never_ wanted to be there. I haven't been to school in a week and I kind of don't want to go back until everything dies down. It's highly unlikely and when I do end up going back, I'm sure my scars and bruises will spark all the rumors up again. I didn't care about that though; I was still slightly bothered by what happen with Rose the other night.

That whole night was very odd and sudden but surreal none the less. At first I didn't get why she had asked me to eat with her or why I had agreed. I just know that it happen and although we had a moment of honesty where we seemed caught up in all the stereotypes, we still managed to get passed it. The momentum between us as we stood by her car still irked me, in a good way most definitely, but something about that irked me. I'm not one to go through girls and be the playboy but with her for some reason, I wanted to kiss her.

I wanted to -so badly but life was already too complicated. By the looks of things I knew she maybe had the same want. I couldn't corrupt someone who didn't know what they were getting themselves into. I felt drawn to her but I also kept getting these flashes of how it was so wrong. All of these thoughts surrounded my mind and the want to kiss her faded as the need to protect her from myself settled in.

The moment she touched my nose, by just barely touching my skin with her fingertips, I couldn't explain it. It was as if this current or this powerful force had suddenly made everything so clear and I walked away. All these last few days I've been trying to blow the regret off as nothing. It was just me needing some company or maybe it was my teenage hormone's, it didn't matter, getting involved with a girl like that and having a life like this; it was irrelevant. So once again shaking the thoughts from my head I continue to take apart this engine and find a replacement for another truck.

The sunlight would be no more in a few hours and then it was time to go home and face the monster. The week has actually been peaceful for once; I'd start my work shifts in the afternoon and have the house to myself in the mornings. For once in my life the day didn't start off as shitty as I was used to. I missed school -not the people or work but the fact that it was usually my peace away from him. There were always arguments and shouting when he got home though, that never changed.

**…**

The yard was filthy with bottles and old cigarettes thrown everywhere. I hear yelling in the house as I walk up the grass that hasn't been cut since I don't remember when. Camille's soft voice echoes through the doorway, I honestly don't see why she puts up with my father or what she sees in him. He's a drunk and miserable, and not to mention his abusive behavior tends to hurt everyone around him. I walk in and notice her picking up her things that were scattered along the floor; she looks up as I enter the living room and smiles sadly.

I knew that smile; it seemed every woman who came across my father had that smile. It meant goodbye. That was nothing to me, I'm used to having women in and out of my life but Camille was actually pretty nice to me. She even bought me a cake and card for my birthday last month. I had gotten used to her cooking for us and asking me about school during the very few dinners my father didn't act like an ass through.

We had developed a friendship strangely. The nights she came over and my father was late getting home, we would talk and laugh, she even tried to convince me to make her black bread once. But watching her now, I can't say I blame her for wanting to leave. She wipes her eyes and takes a deep breath as we both hear my father tossing around objects and yelling profanities about her, she stands and smiles sadly at me, shrugging and trying to gather her things into a duffle bag. I notice the kitchen was the cleanest part of the house and that there was a fresh pot pie centered on the table.

'I-uh, I made you chicken pot pie. I wasn't sure if you would be hungry by the time you got back from work.' I watch as the sadness takes over her face and keep silent.

Camille was okay in my book, in my fathers she was just another thing to take up some time. 'Thank you.' she nods and wipes the fresh tears from her eyes and it's then I notice the bruise across her forearm.

The red scratch marks across her neck and the blouse she was wearing stretched out at the collar. 'Are you okay?' she smiles again, it's bigger this time but still sad. 'I'm fine. Things just got a little out of hand and we decided it was best if I leave.' she talks like I'm some small child who couldn't tell the truth from the lies and that was definitely a lie.

I just nod my head and begin helping her pick up the clothes. Once we have her stuff packed, I start cleaning up the glass from the shattered lamp that once stood on the table next to the couch. 'Oh, Dimitri, no don't. You shouldn't have to do that, it's okay, and I'll clean it up.' I shrug and grab the broom to sweep it up as she tries to pick up other things that were thrown about during whatever happened.

The silence that occurred as we cleaned is routine, I don't ask what happen and she doesn't tell me the details. My father is nowhere to be seen now and as Camille's taxi drives up, I dump the trash and watch as another woman leaves this house broken and battered. I help her with her things and take them to the car; this is something I've come accustom to; saying goodbye. The night is colder than usual and Camille hesitates at the front door. I watch as she takes everything in, she was only here for a month and few weeks, that was how long it took for her to fall in love with my father.

Finally she walks down the cracked cement path as I close the trunk of the taxi; she opens the back door and stops to look at me. Out of all the women who had been with my father, Camille was actually the most decent one. She had a bad past and was an addict and lost her children to child services but she was nice and actually cared. Well, for a little while at least. My father didn't deserve her or any other woman who fell under his flawed charm.

He was the type to wine and dine them, tell them they were beautiful and he wanted to take care of them. But as soon as things didn't go his way, his true self showed. Camille, a lot like other women before her, wanted to save my father except that was impossible. There was no saving him, not if he didn't want it.

Camille walks up to me and cups my face, showing a sad and kind smile and I just nod my head in understanding. _Sorry I couldn't help him and sorry he won't change for anyone, including his own kid._ It only takes a second for her eyes to water at my understanding and then she hugs me, 'You're a good boy, Dimitri, don't ever lose that.' I slowly hug her back and spot a face in the window of the house, Vladimir Belikov, the very end of me.

'Be careful.' I mumble and she nods as we part wiping her eyes.

As she gets into the car and the engine starts, a look comes across her face and she stops me from closing the door. 'Dimitri, promise me something?' I look back to my father who has disappeared from the window and then back to Camille before she speaks. 'Get out of here. Go somewhere and live the life that you deserve.' I take into consideration what she saying and nod numbly at her words, 'Go find yourself someone special and take her far away from your father… far away from here. I hope the next time I see you, you'll say something like that.'

'I hope so too.' I say and she smiles softly sighing as if this is a relief. And with that the car door closes and the taxi drives off into the night.

'Good, she was nothing but a nuisance to me.' I roll my eyes as I close and lock the front door making my way to the kitchen. I can feel his eyes following me and I try my hardest not to say anything. 'What's with you, sad your little friend just left? Well get over it, boy, we're better off without her.'

I find a cup and pour myself something to drink as he stands in the kitchen doorway and chugs another bottle of Russian vodka without even taking a breath. 'Speak for yourself, obmanut'' I mumble as I make my way to the back of the house where my beloved room is waiting for me.

'What did you say, boy?' I ignore his yell as I sit on my bed and push back my anger and frustration. Camille's words flash in my mind again and for a small second; I wish for the chance to leave. It's not likely, but it helps to think about the possibility.

**Rose.**

'So wait, let me get this straight, _y__ou_ hung out with Dimitri Darko and wanted to _kiss_ him but _he_ blew _you_ off?' I nod in defeat and somewhat embarrassment.

'That's pretty much what happen, yeah.' Jill stood in front of me, sipping from the red Solo cup of whatever Eddie had in that punch bowl and stares at me, 'What?' she shakes her head and then shrugs as if to say: she doesn't understand why in the world I would do that.

Normally I wouldn't have told her about my rejection from Dimitri, if that's what that even was, however, I've had a couple of Jäger bombs and beers so my better judgment is a little off at the moment. 'So dinner?' I nod and drink my bottle of liquid courage. 'Dinner with the anti-social foreign boy who no one knows and is kind of freaked out by?' I nod once again and wait for her to make her obvious point, 'Were you drunk? Or tired? Maybe you were suffering from exhaustion and were like in some kind of delusional state for like a few hours?'

'No, I was pretty normal actually. No momentary delusional state or you know, whatever else you just said.' she nods slowly and downs the rest of her cup.

'So he talked to you, like actually spoke words? 'I nod and watch throughout the room as people make their way in and out of the kitchen, 'Does he speak English?' I snap my eyes to Jill who continues to look at me in a concerned manner.

'Yeah, he speaks English, as most people do in America.' I couldn't understand why it was so hard to believe that I had talked -let alone had dinner- with Dimitri Belikov. Is it really that big of a deal?

'But, Rose, that guy doesn't talk to anybody.' I shrug and watch as Lissa and Christian dance in the middle of the living room of Alberta's cabin. It was a little weird to be drinking, playing beer pong and dancing in Alberta's home away from home. After all she was Abe's doctor and just the other day she was lecturing Abe on good health and here I am slamming shots.

'He talked to me and he was actually really interesting to get to know once we got passed all the awkwardness and stuff.' Jill's eyes shot to me as if I was just sprouting another head and gasped. 'Did you just say _interesting?_' I nod and finish off my beer.

I was a little more buzzed than I wanted to be but this was the first time I've been out like this in a while. 'But that guy doesn't talk to anybody! I sit next to him in Karp's class and it's like he's a breathing statue... or like a mime.' I shrug and look to where a couple of people have surrounded the keg but decide to wait for the line to shorten.

I take a peak around the room and watch as my fellow peers enjoy their adolescence. The weekends for me usually were packed with work and a Saturday morning appointment for Abe. However, this morning Alberta cancelled at the last minute do to some emergency so Abe and I had actually had a good breakfast together for once. Then I cleaned the house and finished the many chores I usually do half-assed during the week, a few hours after that I was bored out of my mind and Lissa kept calling me to make sure I was coming to her party. I was hesitant at first mostly because I didn't want to leave Abe alone just in case he wasn't feeling good but Lissa's constant calling pulled off after Abe had answered.

Finally he convinced me, well; almost he basically _made_ me go. I left the house an hour later after swearing him to promise to call if he wasn't feeling good, had any kind of fever and that I would be home before one. He laughed at me at that last part, making fun of me giving myself a curfew and all.

An hour later and Jill still wasn't convinced I was in a right state of mind, she was Lissa's step-sister after their father married Jill's mother about a year ago. It was weird since they were the same age and went to the same school but Lissa didn't treat her any different, well, not at first but she got over it. They were kind of close in a weird way it was strange to me, but then it could just be because I'm an only child. It was only eleven when I found myself wondering around the huge cabin after a dance with Eddie left me in search for the bathroom. I was slightly more buzzed than I was before but knew I couldn't keep drinking if I was going to attempt to drive home, which I really wanted to after Abe didn't answer my last call.

This place was huge and the restroom downstairs was occupied by some freshman who couldn't hold their liquor and puked all over the place. So Eddie let me use the one upstairs but I was a little lost at the moment. It was dark and no one was up here from what I think but a few moments of wondering around in the dark hallway and before I knew it, I had bumped into a hard warm chest as the restroom door opened. 'Hey!'

'Hey?' Dimitri stood there in the doorway of the bathroom tall as ever wearing dark blue jeans, a black button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up just before his elbows and his hair hung loose around his shoulders; he looked absolutely hot. Even with his bandaged chin and bruised face, 'What are _you_ doing here?' The question was strictly out of curiosity but the way it came out was a little… harsh.

Those eyes, his dark depthless eyes squinted in confusion and his jaw clenched firmly. 'I should be asking you the same thing. Who's watering the produce while you're here getting smashed?'

Now it could've been the alcohol taking its toll on me or the humiliation of him leaving me in the middle of the parking lot a few nights ago -that has been bothering me for the past few days but I didn't like what he said one bit. 'Excuse me? I happen to work in can food and the register, Mason waters the produce.' he smirked at my remark but it wasn't his usual half smirk, it held something in it, like he was about to laugh or maybe smile. I don't know but I found myself liking the look on him.


	4. Chapter 4

****Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 4:**Cuddle Some Men, They'll Remember You Bitterly.

'How do you know Eddie?' I shrugged and said nothing to his question. Everything was kind of spinning and I really had to use the bathroom, but for some reason I couldn't get the image of him suddenly walking away from me back in the parking lot out of my head. He made me feel a little weird considering I was pretty sure we were about to kiss. I mean the moment was right. The look in his eyes was smoldering -kind of like in the movies- and he did lean in a good few inches from my lips. It was like a big splash of water in my face the very next second, when he turned on his heel, and walked off quickly. Leaving me standing there confused and alone. 'We're old friends, what's it to you?' He watched as I tried to fold my arms and not seem drunk. I don't know why, but for some reason I didn't want him to know I was kind of drunk. Okay, a lot of drunk. He smirked at me with a certain look in his eyes. Looking me up and down as if checking me out, but letting it be obvious. Good, I wanted him to see I was upset with him.

I shake my head at his staring and attempt to walk around him into the restroom. He however, decides to play some childish game with me and steps in my way. 'Can you move I have to pee?' His smile widens and he folds his arms across his chest. 'Thats attractive.' I pushed him aside and opened the door to the restroom to turn my back to him. 'Yeah, so is your face.' I snap and his amused expression drops as I smiled and I slam the door shut. In the restroom I begin washing my hands. I spot myself in the mirror and see my eyes are a little red and glossy from all the alcohol intake. I wash my face with warm water in some lame attempt to get rid of the dizzy buzzed feeling. As I dry my face and hands, I look to the mirror again. My hair is kind of frizzy from all the humidity on the dance floor, my lip gloss needing another coat and my mind on something else entirely. The hot guy I left standing outside this very door and what changed his mind about kissing me. In a sudden flash, I found myself a little more than angry at him. All I did was be nice to him so far and _he_ was the one who walked away from _me_. For some reason that very fact frustrated me. So in a sudden decision and in my angry drunk stupor; I pull open the restroom door abruptly. I notice he was still standing there. His head snaps up to me and his hand quickly pulls away from his face as I glare. 'Why didn't you kiss me?'

.D.

The shock of her brave question shot through both of us. I knew I should have walked away as soon as she slammed the door, but after her remark about my face. I couldn't help but want to talk to her again. I wasn't sure if I wanted to snap back at her or explain my reasoning for running away the other night, but I felt I had to talk to her at least once more before the night was over. Her eyes widened and my mind blanks. 'Wh-what?' I managed to get out. She stands in the door way and wraps a lock of hair behind her ear. Her expression looks unsure and confused, I'm sure it's at the very fact that she just straight out asked me that question. 'The other night at the store after we had dinner. I wanted to- you- we were about to kiss, but you just walked away. What was that about?' Her glare is obvious and I try not to let her faze me.

I shrug and try to avoid her piercing gaze and how hot she looks in that revealing red top and tight dark jeans. I'm actually happy that Eddie convinced me to come this party. It was better than riding my bike around town just to avoid the angry rampage my father has recently been on. 'I didn't know you wanted to do that.' She rolls her eyes at my stupid reply and steps out of the doorway. We stand in the middle of the dark hall, upstairs and alone, as the heavy beat downstairs continues to pound throughout the whole cabin. 'Yeah you did, but you chickened out. You got scared for some reason.' Her taunting eyes stay on mine and I hold back the blush of my face at her correct answer. How she knew that I'll never know, but I can tell she's really not too happy about being left like that. I wasn't going to let her know she had guessed right, so I put up my defense and challenged her right back. 'I'm not scared of anything.'

An amused look graced her face, but quickly left as she began challenging me right back. 'I think you are. Your just too much of a guy to admit it.' I couldn't take my eyes off her lips. Something that was distracting me for a few moments now. Her expression was determined and it was starting to piss me off. Who was she to say anything to me about something I didn't want to do. To call me out on it. I roll my eyes and turn to walk away, but as I come the end of the hall she says something else. 'Yeah, I thought so.' I don't know what exactly did it, but as I turned to glare at her, something in me snapped. My frustration and annoyance triumphed over my better judgment. Her taunting eyes watching me with amusement and satisfaction. I wanted to prove her wrong, I _had_to prove her wrong. And as I walk right up to her and cup her face. I think to myself, what's a little kiss going to do? 'Want me to prove it?' I asked as she stood in front of me, swallowed and then shrugged. 'Prove it!'

...

_ Prove it_. The words kept flashing in my mind as I held her body close to mine and felt the warmth of our heated frantic kisses take over my mind. I didn't know why but as soon as she said that, something triggered within me. We were hitting both walls as we made our way down the hall to the bedroom I'd seen. If she was still drunk; I couldn't tell. What I was doing; I didn't care. It felt good to not be in my head for once and just enjoy the spontaneous moment that was taking place. I wasn't sure what this frantic make-out session was leading to. All I was sure of was the relief I felt when our lips hit. Her body hit the mattress and she pulled me right down with her. Our hands touched everywhere they could.

My fingers under her top and her small hands in my hair as our tongues taste each other. A few times we would pull away to breathe and she would run her tongue over my lips or I would suck on hers. We were a mess of limbs and lips, until she started unbuttoning my shirt. A brief flash of if I should ask her if she's okay with this went through my mind, but as she pulled her top over her head I blew it off. I felt her stomach and over her bra where her breast fit my grasp and squeezed. She moaned and sucked my tongue as I ran my hands over her perfect breast. I couldn't help myself. A few times little thoughts of what was I doing kept popping up in my mind, but then I would see her under me and forget them. The actions felt good and kept my mind off everything going on in life lately. I didn't know what it was, whether it be Camille leaving or Jesse jumping me, but I felt like right now; I didn't have to think about that. Nothing was going on except the beautiful girl under me and the way that she taste.

The way she kept making me want more of her. The way she quickly got rid of my shirt. Our stomachs and chest touched and I felt like this fire had just spread all over my body. I clutched her to me, raising her leg and wrapping it over my waist, squeezing and grabbing her ass roughly. Her breath hitched at my hands and she ground herself into me. It felt good -no- it felt great. I grind my hardening erection right over her and she clutches my shoulder blades with her fingers. Almost scratching them. We go at this for a bit. Her pulling me closer and rubbing her hands over my naked chest and back. Me, taking off her bra and trapped in the tender skin of her breast. We nip and suck every available body part. Her neck, I'm sure covered in bite marks and my back with her nails racking scratches across it. 'Take off your pants..' She whispers over my mouth.

It was like this huge splash of cold washed over me. A brain cell actually working and making the connection to my other body parts. As her words now make sense to me and I understand clearly what's going on. I stood up from my place above her, watch as she waits for me to do what she asked and notice for the first time exactly what we were doing. She lays there, half naked and wanting, and I can't help but admire her beauty. It strikes me as odd when I find myself questioning why I had to stop now. I mean out of the whole time of what we were doing, why now? I search her body with eager eyes and notice how absolutely beautiful she is. Flawless. Her skin felt like fire, her lips still linger on mine and her hair sprawled out over the pillow. _What are you doing, Dimitri? _I shake my head of all the impure thoughts of the drunk girl on the bed in front of me. Staring at her as she stares at me. Our eyes meet and understanding flashes in her brown eyes. 'Are you okay?' Am I okay?

Thoughts flash through my mind. What was I doing? Why did I stop? What is this girl doing to me. I'm in way over my head here. I stall with the answer to that question, my mind still making sense of the things we were about to do. What she was thinking, whether this was something she often did with guys? My eyes try to ignore her full chest and I look everywhere except to her. 'Im-I' My mind blanks once again and I have to get out. The idea triggers my brain and feet as I begin to scoop up my clothes and dress myself. I avoid eye contact with her and pull my shirt over my head as I gather my boots. There's silence in the room as we both are now dressing. Her in a more slow pace than me and I want nothing more than to run out of here as fast as possible. 'Did I do something wrong or what's-' I don't let her finish the question as I dash out of the room and head downstairs. The party is still on, there's more people it seems and it's hard to find the front door. 'Belikov!' I ignore Eddie's call and shove my way through the sea of drunk teenagers. As I spot the front door, flashes of the feelings with Rose flow through me. The way her body looked, the look in her eyes as she took off my shirt and the way she taste. Although those were all great things, the one thing that pops up the most was the bliss it brought me. The feeling of not having all the usual heavy weight I usually carry. The problems were solved, the weight of the world and my father was lifted, and I have to admit; I liked that feeling.

…

Home was a bigger wake up call than the one I had earlier with Rose. As soon as I spotted the brick wall where the front door to my hell awaited. My frown and head filled up with more distress. The yard once again a mess of beer bottles and cigarette buds. A car engine and parts spread throughout the drive way and spots of oil stained the cement. I put my bike in the garage and lock the big door. The house was lit as I walked up the cracky cement path to the front door, I felt all hope drain from me. He was home and still awake. The giant breath I took in preparation to walk in the house was the only thing I could do since leaving was out of the question. The old door creeks open and I spot him in the kitchen, staggering and wobbling about. I lock the front door and quietly attempt to make way to my room. I'm just about to pass through the hallway door of the kitchen and that's when everything falls on me. 'Where the hell were you?' I can tell from his voice he was already in a bad mood. I close my eyes tightly and refrain from saying the wrong thing. 'Out with Eddie.' He drinks from his bottle of beer and a drop of it seeps down his chin. 'You get paid today?' I look to him and hold in my annoyance with the question he just asked me. We stare at each other for a good few seconds before he swallows another huge gulp from the bottle. 'Answer me, boy, yes or no?'

I shake my head no, knowing full well I have about three hundred dollars in my pocket, but I don't want him knowing that. 'Useless. Just like your mother and her stupid-' I didn't give him time to finish his sentence. I ran with full speed at him and we crashed into the kitchen table. The plate and cup fall to the floor, the chairs fall and the table ends in half. Once I had myself over him I didn't give him a chance to get up. My fist met his face over and over again. I didn't give him a chance to breathe, I swung and let out all my aggression on his face. Until the image of my father bleeding and spitting it out stopped me. Our breath ragged and quick, my fist clenched and ready to let another punch full of anger out, but I held back. This is what he wants, me angry and acting out on it, so he can walk away free. I'll be dammed if he gets away with it, especially that.

I get up and stand at his feet watching him moan and breathe in pain. 'What's mine is mine, my money wasn't part of the agreement.' After that I turn and begin walking away, I only make it to the end of the hallway when I feel him behind me. I shouldn't have turned around. He swings with his arm but there's something clutched in his fist. I don't see it until it's in front of my eyes, that's when I notice the thick glass bottle headed for my face. I shield my eyes, but it leaves the rest of my face exposed. Once he hit my face he swung again and hits my head. I fall to the floor unconscious, the world as I know it blacking and blurring. His voice fades in and out, I barely feel his hands digging in my pockets and before I can do anything I fade away.

**So im not too happy with the ending, but thats how it came out. The next chapter will reveal somethings about Rose and will be a little longer (hopefully). **

**Once again thanks for reading, the alerts, favs and reviews. They are much **appreciated.****

**Until next time buddies (;**


	5. Chapter 5

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 5: **Drowning In the Sea.

_ It was kind of windy that day and the sun wasn't shining at its brightest. I remember the morning mostly and the fear that ran throughout my body. All I did was wake up and the feeling of dread and worry washed over me completely. I barely remember calling the ambulance or helping him to the couch. He couldn't move or talk right. All I kept thinking was don't leave me dad. Not today, not until I can bare it. The sad part was he actually wanted to be here, with me, living. He wasn't like Janine, selfish and greedy, he wanted to be around. That's why I promised I would take care of him. He didn't leave me. So I wouldn't leave him. That's how we rolled._

_The hospital rushed and questioned us as we came in. They said it was good that I turned him on his side; in some cases strokes could be fatal. Abe was a fighter though. I knew though after this everything would be different. My life would become about him and I was okay with that. After the rush of bringing him back to normal and making sure I held myself together for him. We sat in his hospital room and our relationship changed a little. The memory of this conversation is never too far from my thoughts. It lingers, like some kind of distinct smell from childhood or something. I sat next to him as he slept and looked out the window. The rooms silence was about the only thing that made sense. A tumor, a time and that was it. All we could do is wait, go on as if normal._

_'There is a plan for me, Rosemarie. In that plan, I have to leave the world.' I watch as his eyes soften and see the seriousness of his words stare back at me. 'You're going to leave me alone, pop?' He smiles sadly and shakes his head. The bed in the seated position his only way of watching as my eyes water at the very thought of being left without anyone, especially my dad. 'No, Kiz. I would never leave you alone. Not without a plan of course.' His smile turned into a smirk. One that told me he was up to something and that I most likely was not going to like it. He grabs my hand and squeezes to his best ability. I clutch it in my own and wait for him to finish. The heart monitor beeps, the IV in his nose and hand feeding him the medicine he needs to gather the strength so we can go home. I want nothing more than to cry and hide in a little ball of myself. His eyes turn sincere and he softly speaks his next words. 'I think that god or whatever higher power you believe in has a plan for everyone. Although mine is painful and unpleasant, it's fair.' Fair. I didn't think so._

_'This way I can take care of you, kiz. You can live your own life now.' He had made up his mind and that I could see. It just made me feel even worse for wanting to change it. I wasn't okay with him deciding this, with accepting it so quickly. 'This is my plan for you, Rosemarie. Live.' It was a little surprising that this one word was all I needed to understand what he was saying. As more tears fell and he squeezed my hand, I knew what he was getting at. 'Go and live your life, don't make me the reason for it anymore. Your young, kiz, you belong out there in the world. Living and loving. Go and take a chance at it.' Tears fall as I try to hold in the emotion I see in my father's eyes. The meaning they held. How he will miss all the important things I'll encounter. It's all in his eyes, his brown strong eyes that watch me with so much admiration. 'Pop' My voice breaks as he shakes his head and squeezes my hand once again. I cry and cry as he makes me promise to do as he asked. To go out in the world and take a chance. 'You have so much potential, kiz. So much love to give, give it to someone who needs it. Mourn me and remember our time, but keep living.' 'I don't think I can, pop. I wouldn't know how, all I do is work and school.' 'No. No, my kiz, you know exactly how to live. You just have to give yourself the chance.' _

_His words stuck with me. The next day while I drove us back home he had asked me once again to promise him I would do as he asked. I agreed. I promised him I would, that I would at least try. Two months later I see Dimitri in the store, bleeding from his nose and then in the parking lot. I had to help him. When I told Abe what had happen, he smiled. I believe his exact words were: well, I guess you chose your destiny, kiz. I didn't believe it at first. In fact I ignored him and went about my day, but then when Dimitri had come back and he started walking away from me. Like I said; he did something to me. That magnetic pull forced Abe's voice inside my head and I blurted out the first thing I could think of. From then on I couldn't get him out of my mind, especially the way he reacted when I mentioned his mother. The pull, it was a force that could make me do things I didn't understand. I guess it was all part of Abe's plan for me._

...

It felt like the glum and sad look the weather brought was on purpose. I related to the gray sky and coldness of the wind. I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, and couldn't even comprehend why I would do what I did the other night. I was drunk, yes, but I knew better. I bet he thinks I'm some kind of slut who does things like that often. I got carried away, _way _away. On the ride home I was so embarrassed and upset with myself, it was no wonder why he ran out of the room. I practically showed him I was easy and I'm not that type of girl. I have no reasons for my actions other than I wanted to see how far I could push him. How far I could push myself. I didn't like the distance of it, not one bit. It was scary. I have to admit though, when we were kissing, it was like this fire lit through me. As if any kiss before that was just practice, adding up to the grand finally of them all. I like the way he held me, the way his lips moved across mine and the way I was so close to him.

In those few minutes it was once again just me and him. It was spur the moment and so unlike me, but it felt good. I just wanted a better understanding of him. I mean that's what this whole thing was about, right? I went at it the wrong way, but for some reason I keep catching myself unable to not want to be close to him. I didn't understand it and I don't know why I chose him, but it happens. It still stuns me how fast he ran out of that room. How fast our kiss picked up and how quickly I wanted to be with him. He did something to me; his eyes were different, clearer. As if he were free of all the hidden things he usually carries in them and I liked that I made him that way. It's hard to understand and even harder to explain, but isn't that the fun of it. The mystery of someone who catches your attention. His was determined to be discovered and I wanted to be the one to do it. It was sort of like that pull. A magnetic pull that neither of us understood.

I knew once I saw him in that parking lot he was nothing like the people in this town. He was different, hidden and practically a ghost. Just like in school yesterday when I tried to find him. He didn't go today either, I looked everywhere for that guy. Eddie said he hadn't talked to him since the party and by the odd look he gave me; I knew he found it weird I was looking for him. Everyone knew I had helped him and they knew about the almost kiss, but what they didn't know was that as soon as our lips did touch. I wanted to be as close as I possibly could to him. It was odd how someone could do this to one. Abe was right about love, it does odd things to you. Things you can't really explain, to no one, because they'll never understand.

…

Work was still work and Mason still the same old Mason. He talked about how much he liked Avery, what happen after I pulled the disappearing act at the party and questioned me about where I took off to. I didn't tell him what had actually happen, I just told him I had to get back to Abe. I worked in silence all day. At school Lissa kept watching me curiously, but never asked what was wrong. I guess she probably figured it had to do with Abe. It kind of did in a way. I wasn't going to do anything different, but seeing that look in my dad's eyes as he begged me to try. I couldn't lie or say no and now here I am. Watching as he scoops spaghetti into his mouth like he hadn't ate in years, and thinking about Dimitri. 'Slow down, pop, you're going choke on a noodle and I'm not doing CPR.' He smiles and shakes his head. 'Don't worry, kiz, if the noodle doesn't kill me there's always plan b.' My smile drops as he points to his head with his fork and I glare at his joke.

The doorbell rings and Abe just shrugs as I shake my head at him. 'Not funny, old man.' I get up from the table and make my way to the front door. Through the little window on the side of the door is a tall shadow. The curtains aren't very thick, so I can tell the persons height standing at the door. As I open it, surprise and shock run through me and by the look on his face, it ran through him as well. Dimitri stood there, in his tall stance and dirty clothes, smelling like car oil. The Band-Aids are all gone, except now there's a deep cut on his lip and white gauze taped above his right eye. His eyes are tired and red. He looks like he hasn't slept in days and his hair is a mess, something I noticed he took good care of. He clears his throat and uncomfortably puts his hands inside his pockets. I walk outside and close the door behind me so Abe won't hear.

'Hi.' 'Hey, am I interrupting anything?' I shake my head no and fold my arms across my chest, waiting for him to continue. 'Um, I just wanted to come by and explain myself. I know I took off on you-' 'Again.' His head snaps up and he meets my eyes. He nods and then looks back down to his feet. I watch as he struggles to say what he's thinking. It bothers me and I can feel his unsureness becoming awkward. Something we both don't need right now, so I make it a little easier for him and change the subject. 'What happen to your face?' He swallows and shakes his head. 'It's nothing. I fell.' Lies. 'Into a door?' He sighs and gives me a glare. 'Are you always this rude?' My eyes widen at his snarky words and I can't help but let out a laugh. 'Wow,_ I'm_ rude. You leave me hanging twice –once with me totally naked- and I'm the one being rude..' His eyes fall to look at his feet again. His head shakes and when he looks back up to me there's softness to his eyes that I cant look away from.

'You weren't naked, you had pants on. So what if I did leave you, maybe I didn't want to-' 'oh, you wanted too. We both know that.' Another glare erupts from his face as he snaps at me again. 'Don't flatter yourself, besides do you do that often?' 'What?' 'Throw yourself around like that.' Oh! No, he didn't. ' Is that your subtle way of calling me a slut?' He sighs again and runs his hands through his hair. The light brown locks fall around his face and in some perfect flaw, outline it. 'No, no, 'I'm sorry. I just- I just wanted to come by and apologize for what happen and for-' 'Avoiding me?' He meets my eyes again and his become curious. 'I looked for you at school, but you didn't show up. I even asked Eddie if he'd seen you, but he didn't.' He nods and shoves his hands in his pockets once again. A long minute of silence passes and I spot my dad looking out through the big window of the kitchen. An idea hits me and I'm risking a lot by doing what I'm about to do, but I couldn't let him leave. 'Do you want to come in, its spaghetti night.' He hesitates, much like when I asked to drive him home, but after a long silent minute of thinking it over. He nods and I open the front door, leading him inside my house.

**Okay so i wont have time to update at all this week. Thought id do it now. I wanted this chapter to be longer, but im kind of busy with other stuff so. Like i said about the story going at a quick pace, a lot will happen and i want the story to stay interesting. If that makes sense.**

**Thanks again for the alerts, favs, and reviews. Please feel free to leave some more (;**

**As always thank you so much for reading!**


	6. Chapter 6

****Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 6:** They Who Made You, They Made Me Too.

The silence that occurred as we walked into the kitchen felt like it was about to swallow me whole. The thought of how Abe was going to take Dimitri in our house was questionable. I mean what would he think of this exactly? I wasn't too sure; I did know however that he was going to have fun with it. No doubt about it. We walk into the kitchen and Abe quickly pretends to be eating his food as if he wasn't watching through the window. His eyes move up to me and he has the fakest look of surprise I've ever seen. 'Are you done spying, old man?' His eyebrows rise with confusion and he watches as Dimitri strolls in behind me. 'What do you mean kiz?' I roll my eyes and gesture to his elbow that was crushing the plate of garlic bread next to him. 'You were so quick to get back to your seat before I got here, you didn't even notice your squashing the bread.' He blinks at me and then looks to his elbow and quickly moves it off the plate.

'I was just trying to get comfortable is all-' 'Yeah, save it. I caught you and you're a horrible liar.' He shrugs and continues to eat as I place another plate and cup on the table. 'Pop, this is Dimitri my..' My mind draws a blank as I gesture toward the tall boy standing in the doorway of the kitchen and come at a loss of what to introduce him as. Abe watches me, amused by my sudden loss of thought and the blank look on my face as I struggle with what to say. 'Friend. I'm Rose's friend, Dimitri Belikov.' Dimitri steps forward and reaches his hand out to my father; Abe wipes his hands with a napkin and shakes Dimitri's hand while looking at me with a hint of a smirk. 'Yeah, Dimitri is my friend. From school. I helped him in the parking lot that night; remember I told you about that..' Abe nods and gestures for Dimitri to sit down in the chair next to his. I snap out of my lame attempt to make this not awkward and sit across from both men. I serve Dimitri as Abe watches him curiously while he eats.

The quiet was dominant as we all sat and ate. Dimitri set and focused on his plate, me looking at both my father and Dimitri while trying to avoid the obvious awkwardness and then there was my dad. He piled fork full after fork full of spaghetti in his mouth and curiously watched Dimitri do the same. Every now and then his eyes would snap to me, but I would quickly divert my eyes somewhere else. As if it were no big deal this strange boy was having dinner with us. The only noise you could hear throughout the whole entire house was the silverware hitting the plates and a light thump of the towel hitting the table after Abe wiped his mouth every so often. Dimitri stayed focused on his plate, his head down and hovering over the table as if guarding not only his food, but himself. After a few more minutes of this, Abe set down his cup and picked up the plate with the garlic bread and held it near Dimitri. 'Some burnt bread, Dimitri?' I roll my eyes at his remark and watch as Dimitri hesitantly takes a small piece of bread and sets it on his plate.

'Its okay if you don't eat it, Rosemarie cooked. So, I won't hold it against you if you're just humoring me.' Abe smiles wide at my glare as Dimitri nods. Although I'm thankful that the quiet is gone, leave it up to the old man to do it at my expense. 'So you go to school with the kiz?' Dimitri nods and drinks his soda, but he keeps his eyes to the table as Abe looks on to him. If this reminded me of anything, it would be like I had brought home my boyfriend to meet my father and although that wasn't the case. It certainly did feel that way. 'What classes do you have together?' I continue eating as Dimitri swallows his food and answers in a low tone. 'Just economics, sir.' Abe nods and looks to me again as I try once more to avoid his eyes. 'So just one class..' Dimitri and I both nod and continue eating. 'Its Stan's class, pop.' 'Ah, Stanley, my friend.' Abe and I laugh as Dimitri finally looks up at us curiously. 'At last year's parent teacher conference, Abe kind of scared the shit out of Stan. I had him for government and I was late to class a couple of times. So the old man _kindly_ explained that I had a job and wouldn't always make it on time.' Dimitri nodded at my shrug and Abe laughs once again.

As we were eating, conversation was actually pretty light. Abe had asked Dimitri where he was from in Russia and had also told him about the time he had to travel there for work. They had started talking about different foods and places there that they had been to. Dimitri became a little more relaxed as they talked and even laughed once or twice at Abe's cheesy jokes. The subject of Dimitri's father or the visible marks on his face didn't come up at all. Something I was actually proud of Abe for not bringing up. Not that he would have, but it wasn't like Abe to ask about things like that. The subject of school came up once or twice and Abe had mentioned that I was looking to go to college. When he asked Dimitri about his plans for the future, things kind of went another way. 'So Dimitri, what will you do after graduation?' Dimitri shrugged and avoided Abe's eyes as he talked. 'Um, I haven't really thought about that, sir. I have a job at the tow yard with Mikhail, but I haven't thought too much about anything else.' Abe nodded and sipped his hot tea, he hated the stuff and preferred coffee, but Alberta had put him on a diet. 'I don't think I like that your boyfriend doesn't have a plan for your future, kiz.'

The noodle I was currently swallowing got caught in my throat as Dimitri almost drops his fork and Abe sits back and smiles. After a couple minutes of a coughing fit, I finally am able to look at my father and glare. His eyes are squinted with a look of amusement in them and his smile has taken over his face. 'Um, he's- he's not my-' 'I'm not her boyfriend, sir.' Dimitri's voice was the loudest since he's been here, it was firm and final. His eyes stared right into Abe's and I found myself a little embarrassed by his determination to deny that very fact. It was like I had the plague or some hideous disease and the very thought of even being anywhere near that close to me was just wrong. I could feel myself blush at Dimitri's quick peek at me. I swallowed deeply and studied my half empty plate as the quiet had returned. Only now it was with a vengeance.

Abe sat back and watched as Dimitri and I eagerly avoided each other's gaze. I knew he was smiling and that his eyes carried that soft humor in them. I also knew it was only a matter of time before he would make some sort big deal out of this whole thing. After we finished, I picked up and began putting the dishes in the sink. Abe and Dimitri were talking about books and shows they seen on the history channel. 'So you read westerns, fix cars and aren't going to college why?' I look to see both guys with light smiles on their faces. Dimitri's surprising me the most as I continue to listen to their conversation. 'I don't really know, sir. I never thought I'd have an opportunity like that to go and put myself through something big like college.' Abe nods and looks to me with a glint of suspicion in his eyes. It kind of scared me; I wasn't sure what he was going to do now. Insult my cooking skills again or bring up the awkward issue of us not dating. 'Do you have any idea of what you would like to do, you know, for a career?' Dimitri shrugged as I looked back to the sink and continued washing cups.

A minute had passed before Dimitri answered, but when he did I heard something in his voice. A sort of sincerity in it that made me even more curious about him. Abe studied his face and waited patiently as Dimitri worked through his thoughts. 'I think I'd like to travel. Just go out and experience life the way you wouldn't be able to here. Someone I know, they had this book and I always used to look at it as a child. It had all these pictures of beaches and mountains and all these sights to go and visit. To experience. I think I'd like to do something like that, something -anything- to get out of here.' Abe smiled and nodded as if he understood Dimitri's words exactly. I went back to washing dishes and pots as they continued to talk. 'I used to have the same dream. I wanted to travel and see the world, but then the kiz was born. I was in love and my dreams changed. I was going to have a baby and marry my girl and life was going to be great.' This time Abe had both mine and Dimitri's attention fully. I forgot about the plate in my hands, Dimitri wasn't focused on his hands or the table and Abe was looking into the kitchen. In no particular way and at no particular thing. He was just focused on the illusion in his own mind of what he wanted his life to be like, and I watched his eyes light up.

'Life has a funny way of working out, huh?' Dimitri nodded in agreement and I felt myself feel the sadness approaching as Abe kept talking. 'I had it all. A good job, a beautiful baby girl to raise and a future wife. God just had a different plan for me. One without my fiancée and with my kiz.' I let my gaze wonder into the water and suds as memories of the day Janine left clouded my mind. Flashes of when Abe first got sick and how my life had become something else entirely. 'What happen.. To your wife..' The question snapped me out of my stupor and into the eyes of my father who sadly smiled at me and then faced Dimitri. 'She didn't like the plan and so she left. I got sick and the kiz had to grow up. Fast. Too fast and now she has to take care of me.' Dimitri let his eyes set on me and in them I seen understanding. He knew something about me, something so personal and deep I couldn't hide the light blush at his stare. I faced the sink and tried to forget the subtle and sad atmosphere blanketing the kitchen. I didn't want his pity or his look of sorrow. I just wanted to move on from that whole conversation.

Dimitri had decided it was time for him to go. So after I finished the dishes, I walked him to the door and we had said our goodbye's. He didn't have his bike with him and I had offered him a ride home, but of course he declined wanting to walk. Abe was already on the couch as I closed the door and peeked my head around the wall. He sat there, remote in his hand and eyes set on the TV screen in front of him. 'What?' I smiled at him knowing I was there and took a couple of steps into the living room. Amazed. Surprised. Confused and especially flabbergasted at what had just happened. Well, I just had to ask. 'How did you do that?' He stood facing the TV and changed the channel. 'What?' 'Get him to talk..' He shrugged and kept pressing the channel button. 'I just listened, kiz.' I squinted my eyes and stood confused at his answer. He said it with such assurance as if it were something that simple. 'Pop, Dimitri isn't like that. He isn't like Eddie or Lissa, he doesn't talk, he's quiet. He kind of keeps to himself a lot and here you get him to tell you all his hopes and dreams. I don't get it..'

Abe turns to face me finally and smiles. His eyes wear the soft kindness in them I remember as a little girl. 'I was just being polite to your friend. Maybe he felt he could talk to me.' I laugh quietly and stand, still slightly shocked at my pop and his simple logic. 'I wonder why..' He shrugs again gesturing with a nod to the window. 'So stop wondering and go find out, kiz' I blink in confusion as he turns to me once again and nods to the front door. I stand and debate for a few short seconds as my father stares at me already knowing my decision. 'You'll be okay?' He nods at my question and I grab my sweater, pulling it on as he speaks. 'Yeah. I'm just going to be here, watch some animal planet and then maybe in a little while; I'll go poop.' I roll my eyes and laugh again at him as I make my way to the door. 'Thanks for the play by play.' 'You're welcome!' The last words I hear from my dad as I close the door and search for Dimitri's retreating figure down the street.

...

'Your father he's pretty cool.' I laugh and continue to walk along the sidewalk next to Dimitri. Abe had been right about going after Dimitri. As soon as he heard me yell for him he waited for me to catch up to him a few houses down from mine. So in some odd turn of the universe, Dimitri and I decided to take a walk. It was strangely comfortable. The sky was dark and the only light was the few street ones spread out through the neighborhood. 'Cool isn't a word I would use to describe the old man. Sweet maybe, kind and funny definitely, but not too sure about cool.' Dimitri nodded and kept his eyes forward as I looked at my feet pass the grassy and cracked cement. 'He's a lot better than my father.' 'Yeah?' I watch him as he nods and avoids my eyes. 'Definitely. My father he.. He's a very bitter and angry man. There isn't one day that goes by where he doesn't remind me of it.' The sudden information was a little surprising at first and I wanted to call him on actually sharing something with me, but I didn't. I just kept that thought to myself and continued to walk. 'Why is he like that towards you?' He shrugged and stuffed his hands inside his pockets once again.

'There are a lot of things in my past that keep us this way. He won't let me forget them and I don't think I could if I tried.' The wind shifted again and I held my sweater tighter around me. Dimitri continued to walk down the dirt road, his tall frame shadowing over mine in the ground. I wanted to ask him more. I wanted to know more about him and what he was talking about. His silence spoke the answer to my unasked question; he didn't want to talk about it. 'So my dad likes you, which is strange, but at least he's got a new friend.' He nodded and smirked at me. 'You won't talk to me, but you will my dad..' He shrugged with his hands inside his hoodies pockets, shaking his head as if it was nothing. 'It's not a big deal. He's a nice guy, asks a lot of questions, but he's okay. I guess I know where you get that from.' He made a face at me and then quickly turned to face in front of us. I laughed at his remark and continued to walk beside him. 'You two were like a couple of girls in there. Chatting and giggling like some teenagers at the mall.' He shrugged again and came to an abrupt stop.

I stopped as well and looked around waiting for him to show me why it was we were in the middle of the street just standing around. 'What's wrong?' He turned to face me, he wore a serious expression and it looked as if he wanted to say something. He studied me for a while before he spoke; there was confusion and hesitance flashing in his eyes. I waited for him to talk, but every time I thought he was he didn't. 'Are you okay? Is there something wrong..' He shook his head as if to come out of the daze he was in. He let out a sigh and opened his mouth to speak but it quickly closed right after. My guess would be he wanted to say something, but didn't know how. 'Just ask..' He nodded slowly and then looked to the ground. Another minute of silence and then suddenly his head snapped up and he spoke curiously. 'Rose, why _did_ you help me?' His question didn't stump me and I didn't have to ask to know what he was talking about. He just wanted to know. 'I don't know. I guess- It was something my dad said. He told me to take a chance, to go out and live, you know? I don't know, I just.. I seen you out there and what those guys were doing to you and I thought; there it is. That's what pop must have been talking about. Doing something like that; something that would hopefully change for the better. I don't know, I was like drawn to you. I guess. That sounds creepy and doesn't make any sense, but that's the only way I can explain it.'

He nodded in understanding and then asked another question. This one however; I don't think I was ready for. 'What happen the other night, at Eddie's party, what was that?' 'What?' He smiled at my lame attempt to pretend not to know what he was talking about and then he looked at me. His head turned to the side in amusement, his eyes glazed with curiosity and loose strands of his hair outlined his face. I've never seen something so sexy in my life. He looked at me in a way that made me want to smile and laugh, like he knew exactly what I was doing. As if he was teasing me in a way. 'Come on, Rose, you know what I'm talking about.' 'No, I don't think I do.' I started to walk again, this time Dimitri stood in the same spot. A smirk on his face as I turned around and sighed. 'You're not going to drop this are you?' He shook his head no and slowly stepped towards me as I sighed again. 'Why did you kiss me?' He spoke loud and clear, the smirk still placed on his face. All I could do was try and avoid his lingering gaze. 'I don't know. Is that weird or what?' He nodded. 'You know how you said you were drawn to me..' I look up from my shoes and notice his eyes were different, the smirk was gone, but he still seemed amused. 'I think I- I feel it too. Is that weird or what?' I couldn't hide the shocked surprised expression on my face and by his lazy smile I'm sure he noticed. 'Yeah, that's pretty weird.' We both nod and I try to hold in the biggest smile that wants to escape my lips from him. We turn back and begin to walk to my house. We walk slow, taking our time to get there. He begins some small talk about my dad and why we ask so many questions. I couldn't help but think that this was good. The beginning of something great, a friendship or whatever we were. I didn't know what. I wasn't going to push anything though. Dimitri seemed to be holding a lot of himself back and I was fine with that, I was doing the same thing anyway. After he walked me to my door and left, I walk back in the house. Abe had went to sleep, so I make my way up stairs. My bed moves as I sit and take off my shoes, not helping the fact that this whole night has been pretty odd. Good, but odd or odd in a good way. However you explain it, I went to bed with a different look at the boy who when I first seen him. He seemed so troubled and quiet, brooding and alone. He seemed to push people away, but I think it was like Abe had said; taking a chance on someone could do some good. For both of us.

**So sorry for the late update, super busy with stuff. Anyway, this chapter i kind of had trouble with, but i tried to my best abilities. Hopefully you likey.**

**Thanks once again for the alerts, favs and reviews. There a big bowl of awesome sauce (:**

**And thanks for reading!**


	7. Chapter 7

****Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 7:** One of These Days You'll Break Me of Many Things.

'So where's you're uh_ friend_ at tonight?' Mason sneers the word friend like it's some kind of deathly virus. As if he did acknowledge that Dimitri is my friend he would explode from the inside out. I shrug and keep my eyes to the book in front of me. We were on our last break from work and for the first time in almost two weeks, Dimitri hadn't showed up tonight. 'I'm sure he has things to do. He's got his own life to live.' Mason rolls his eyes and continues to shovel the lasagna his mother brought him into his mouth savagely. This was Mason's way of interrogating me about Dimitri and the fact that since he had dinner at my house, he's been here every single night. At first I wasn't surprised to see him walking in the store, I had figured he most likely was shopping, but when he made a B line for me; the feeling of surprise overwhelmed me.

_He walked from the beginning isle to the very back where I was stacking toilet paper on a shelf. I remember very vividly what he wore and how strands of his hair flowed in the wind created when he walked. His long legs took big open steps and his eyes never faltered from me. He had on his jeans, black t-shirt and topped it off with his blue sweater moving like there was a constant breeze following him. He looked good, real good. It took a moment for me to focus back on what I was doing, but as his deep voice sounded I snapped myself out of the daze. 'I thought you were canned food?' I blink and focus on his smirking lips as I smile and try to hold in the blush screaming to come out. 'I am.' He smiled sideways and gave away a care free expression, but there was amusement too. 'So why you stacking butt wipe?' I shake my head and try to push away the shock of him being here with a smile. 'It's in the job description.'_

_I remembered that whole first night he came here. How carefree and funny he was. Yeah, Dimitri Belikov making jokes and most at my expense. He was really great to hang out with and even helped me work a little bit. He had this happy demeanor about him that I couldn't figure out exactly. Since meeting him he was always so glum and brooding, but that first night he was here there was something I couldn't quite figure out and still can't. I didn't want to ask him about it though, just in case I pushed that happiness out of him. I didn't want to risk it. 'Rose Hathaway attends St. Vladimir's high school, works at a grocery store. Special skills include: making bad spaghetti, helping hopeless delinquents and stacking chalky shit paper.' We both laughed at his good natured humor. He leaned on the ladder to the side of me and watched as I kept working. 'Are you making fun of me?' He smiled wide at my questioning expression and shook his head looking away. 'Never, Rose, I would never make fun of you. I'm just listing your qualities, stating the facts. Your college applications should look great.' We both laughed out loud and were given a glare from Mason as he passed by for the first of many times that night._

Those nights after were the first time that I actually looked forward to going to work. Since dinner with Abe, Dimitri and I have established a pretty solid friendship. He came to see me every night and even had finally gone back to school. He still kept his distance a little, but I felt I was slowly making dents in his guard. He always kept it up. Sometimes he would let little bits of information out and I wanted to ask more about it, but something in me told me not to. 'Earth to Rose!' I blink and snap my eyes to Mason. He's got tomato sauce on his chin and is giving me a confused glare. 'Did you hear anything I've said?' I shake my head and return my eyes back to the book we had to read for English. 'I said next week you don't have any late shifts.' My head snapped up at his words and I glare in confusion. 'What! Why?' Mason shrugs and focuses back to his nearly empty plate, purposely avoiding my eyes. 'My dad said you could come in early instead.'

'That doesn't make sense, Mase, I asked for the late shifts. If I go in early that makes things harder at home and school..' He shrugs again and keeps his eyes away from mine and centered on his plate. 'I don't know, my dad just said that's the schedule for next week. Don't argue about it.' Something about his words didn't sit well with me. I requested those hours and Mason's father knew why I had; in fact he even gave me a raise to help out with the whole Abe situation. So how the sudden change happen and me not having any idea of it struck me as odd. 'Mase?' He kept his gaze elsewhere and was becoming fidgety. This usually meant that he was holding something back. Like when I had caught him staring at me for long amounts of time when I first started working here and he denied and denied it. He wouldn't look at me and that's when I knew he wasn't telling the truth. 'Mase, did you request to move the schedule around?' A long silent pause took place and slowly but surely, Mason nodded. 'Why?' He shrugged again. I knew what this was about. The way Mase would act or the certain things he did whenever Dimitri was around were a dead giveaway.

When he would walk around the store and linger in the isle or whatever part I was working in and Dimitri would be talking to me. The way he made it obvious that he was checking up on me when I would take my breaks and Dimitri and I would sit outside. How conveniently he needed to give me my schedule in front of Dimitri, like I didn't know it already, and interrupt our conversations. How he made sure to glare as Dimitri walked around the store in search for me or his failed -yet hilarious- attempts of trying to intimidate him. I couldn't tell if it was jealousy or he thought he was really looking out for me. Either way, I knew he didn't like the fact that I considered Dimitri my friend. Or the fact that I considered him at all. 'I don't get it, Mase, you hate him that much?' Mason looked up to me and shrugged, his eyes showed sadness and confusion. 'I just don't get why you waste your time with someone like him.' _Someone like him_. 'What is that supposed to mean? He's my friend, Mase. I don't tell you who you can and can't hang out with.' He sighed and leaned over the table we were sitting on. He came close to my face as he lowly and slowly said his next words. Determination and frustration clear in his eyes.

'Yeah, well, none of my friends killed their mother or get into all that trouble.' The way he said them and the way his eyes showed how serious he was made something snap inside of me. He took my questioning of his grudge against Dimitri to a whole new level. I got angry and it happen very quickly. I glared at Mason as he sat back down in his seat and finished his food like nothing ever happened. 'You know it's one thing to be jealous, but to say something like that isn't very nice.. Or wise.' Mason watched as I closed my book and gathered my school things angrily placing them back inside my backpack. 'I never said I was jealous and I'm not the only one who thinks that about him, Rose. The whole goddam school knows what happen, there's no use trying to convince me any different.' Slamming my bag down on the table and shooting Mason a deadly glare, I yelled at him. 'No one knows anything about what happen! You sit here and act like you know him and everything about him. Just like everyone else, Mason. You don't know him!' 'And you do? That guy barely says a word to anyone, but he comes over here and it's like you two are bff's or something! Fuck, Rose! And I may not like him very much, but at least I'm not deluding myself!' Mason and I were face to face and standing over the table top of the wooden bench out back. I was angry and I found myself defending Dimitri like if it was me at question here. 'What the hell is that supposed to mean?' He shrugs and begins cleaning the place where his food was avoiding my question.

'Mason!' He throws away his food and then stands just in from of me a good few feet away. 'I know you like him. It's pretty obvious; you've been searching the door the whole night like some lost little puppy. It's like you want him to come, so you could stare and drool at him all night.' I took his words in very carefully. Mason did have some jealousy in his eyes, but his other words were true. This whole shift I have been looking at the doors waiting for that tall brooding sweet guy that made my nights bearable. 'You think it's easy watching you lust after some psycho who could be playing you. He's trouble, Rose, but if you want to waste your time don't let me stop you.' Mason begins walking to the door of the store and before he could make his way in, I had to get the last word. 'I won't. And by the way, you have sauce on your chin! Do you need a bib or something!' Mason shakes his head as he walks in the store and slams the door shut. He was jealous, yes, but he was also just like all the other people who didn't see Dimitri the way I did. Misunderstood.

...

_ 'Why did she leave your father?' I took a moment to swallow the question. The night was clear and a little cold, but it felt good to breathe some fresh air and get out of the stuffy store for a while. 'She said because she didn't love him anymore. That she didn't want to make everyone miserable and stay somewhere she didn't want to be.' He watched as I released a short laugh as I shook my head disbelieving. 'She made it seem like she was doing us a favor, can you believe that? Abe gets sick and she runs away, leaves me to pick up the pieces. Typical Janine.' I was on break and we were sitting out back on the old wooden bench where I usually ate lunch every day. Dimitri had asked about my mother and Abe. He smoothly avoided my question about his life and ended up turning it on me. 'Do you- do you miss her?' He sat on the bench part straddling the seat and faced me as I was on the table. My feet dangling off the bench part and my hands nervously taking the invisible lint off my sweater sleeves. I sighed at the heavy question. I had never thought about missing Janine, in my mind we were better off without her. However, his question made me take a minute to think and I couldn't come up with an answer. 'I don't really know..'_

_'What about your mom, don't you miss her?' He shook his head no, but it wasn't the answer to the question. It was his way of letting me know that he didn't want to talk about it. I looked away and back up to the sky. It was dark and only some stars were visible. I avoided his lingering and powerful gaze. Usually when I'd ask something personal about him, he would avoid the topic or answer vaguely; it was frustrating because every question he threw at me, I had answered. He wasn't being very fair. 'My father is kind of like your mother. They're both selfish in their own way.' I nod and wait for him to continue. 'He just wants me to suffer all of the time.' I looked to him in confusion, wondering what kind of father would want to do that to their own child. Different questions came at me all at once and I tried so hard to hold them back afraid of being rejected another answer. However, that was hard to do when all I wanted to do was figure him out even more. 'How could your own father hate you so much?' The eerie silence was long and anxious. He looked to the ground and a sad expression covered his face. 'I'm pretty sure you've heard why..' 'I hear a lot of things, some of which weren't exactly true, but maybe it will help if I hear it from you.' He shrugged and looked away towards the empty parking lot. I kept my eyes on him, wondering and waiting what it was that he hid so deeply and that his father treated him like shit for. With a final and long sigh, Dimitri looked towards me and swallowed. 'It's my fault my mother's dead and he feels I should be punished for it.' He shrugs and then walks a few steps toward the empty parking lot, leaving me to take all this in._

I couldn't help but look to the door every few minutes and my shift was almost over. He wasn't coming, okay, but that didn't help the fact that I really wanted him to. Since he started showing up, I couldn't help but wonder about him throughout the day. Even in school, which we decided to be discreet about since he didn't like my friends too much and they didn't like him or were afraid. My mind still wondered. I'd watch him in class and catch myself confused at the reason why he kept himself hidden from everyone else. I had heard the story about his mother, how it was an accident and how his father was released from jail even after the discovery of him abusing her. Dimitri held a huge chip on his shoulders. The guilt of whatever did happen that night had taken over his life and he just accepted it without a fight. 'I'm going home now. I'll see you tomorrow, jerk.' Mason just rolls his eyes as I pass him on my way to the back room. I timed out and gathered my stuff then headed to my car. Usually –if he were here- Dimitri would walk me to my car and say goodnight. I had missed him, something I was afraid to admit. It bothered me how badly I wanted to see him tonight and how much I liked spending time with him. It was no mistake I liked him and even more after that awesome kiss yesterday. Somehow, I think it will be a lot harder for him if I made those feelings known and I didn't want to push him away. That already happen, twice, and I wasn't about to lose the progress made.

'_So you are going to school tomorrow, right?' He smiles small and nods his head. 'Yeah, but I don't think we should, you know, hang out. I don't want to ruin your reputation or anything.' I laugh as we walk side by side to the middle of the parking lot towards my car. 'Definitely don't want to ruin that, it is my life after all, avoiding scum trouble like you.' He smiles again and nudges me with his shoulder. 'You're the one who talked to me first. I even tried to get away from you, but can't get rid of you no matter what.' 'Yeah, because I did force you to come here every late shift I have for the past what, week?.' He laughs out loud, a sound I found endearing and wouldn't have minded hearing again. 'What can I say you're hard to avoid and you get to eat all the free Cheetos you want.' 'So you're using me for my benefits. You really are trouble.' He shrugs and smiles widely as we approached my car. 'That and I get the pleasure to hang out with you..' I blush a little but avoid his eyes and play it off, opening the door to my car. 'What a line that was, does it work often?' He smiles once more, showing those perfect lips of his across his face. 'I was hoping it would get you naked again and want to have sex with me in your back seat. It looks pretty comfy.' I could hold back the deep blush that appeared on my face as I watched his eyes spark with amusement. So in order to wash away the very detailed images of what we could get away with in my back seat, I played off his comment with my usual sarcasm. 'If you don't run away this time.' His smile had dropped and his gaze went everywhere except to me. The childish look made me laugh at him and he snapped his eyes back to me. 'It was a joke, chill.' He shook his head and rolled his eyes as I got in my car and started the engine. Then it happen, as i pulled on my seat belt he had leaned his head into the car and surprisingly pecked my cheek softly. To make him more uncomfortable and see how far I could push him and get away with. That and to hide my giddiness of him kissing me. I hired my window a little and yelled out to his retreating figure. 'Besides, the backseat is kind of small. I'm flexible, but not that flexible.' I smiled as he shook his head and kept walking toward his bike and then I drove off._

**Sorry for the long wait, the holidays had taken over my life and I kind of ****struggled with the way i wanted this chapter to come out. Im kind of not happy with the way it did, but i tried my best.**

**The next chapter is a Dimitri pov and will explain some things. It will most likely be posted after New Years, ill try to before, but if not, sorry.**

**The italics are moments that Rose remembers from the times with Dimitri and soon the story will get to where we all want it to go. Im excited. But drama will follow too, so dont get too eager. Anyway thanks for reading! Alerts, Favs and Reviews are welcome (;**


	8. Chapter 8

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 8**: Broken Hands and Boys In Danger.

The bright shine of the light bulb hanging from the inside of the hood I was working under was beginning to hurt my eyes. The nights were becoming a bit colder and my hooded sweater wasn't keeping it out as it had used to. The sound of metal pinging against the concrete snaps me out of my work and I reach down to pick up the tool I've dropped once again. I was already here for forty five more minutes than I was supposed to be. I wanted to get home and shower before heading to visit Rose. _Rose._ The sound of her name brings a smile to my face. The way she makes me smile and forget, even for just a few hours, all the pain and drama of my life is a mystery in itself. It was strange how she brought out the good in me, which was something I didn't think anyone would _ever_ see again. 'Dimitri!' I turn to look toward the shop and spot Mikhail waving for my attention and nod. 'You should go home before it gets any later. Be back straight after school!' I nod once again and begin to clean up the mess of tools scattered around me.

Usually I hate this part of the day. The part where I'm only minutes away from entering my personal hell and it's been a crazy one lately. 'If you have any trouble remember to call, I'll go and get you. Trucks looking good by the way..' I give my routine answer of a nod to Mikhail as I make my way out the door and into the front lot of the tow yard. I used to think that here, fixing cars and getting dirty was my escape, my time to breathe. Lately though, I think I've found another peace. As always, Mikhail makes sure to offer his help if I should need it. He's been like a father to me, giving me a job and paying me with interest. He was kind and always reliable, what a real father should be, but I found myself keeping some distance so that _my_ father wouldn't get too close. All I needed was another Alberta case on my hands and then I was out of a job and stuck with nothing. And I'll be dammed if I'm going to lose another good part of my life to one of Vladimir's schemes.

The ride home was silent and calming as I passed the trees flowing with the heavy wind. I've had this bike since I was 14, a gift from my mother and one I'll always cherish. The roads moved under the rubber tires and the wind seemed to strengthen my excitement at the vision of seeing Rose again. I've been looking forward to this all day and I still shock myself at why. How she seemed to just let me be me and keep the things I wanted hidden away. I know she wants to dive in deeper, but I think it's best if I keep her at the surface of things. Thankfully, she understands that. Hopefully. I gain speed and pedal down the long quiet dirt roads to my house. The night became empty and odd, suddenly I felt alone and numb as the vision of my house came into view. It was odd how moods could shift, feelings could fade, but I kept my ground and continued into the yard. There was no old beat up truck in the drive way, no lights on in the house and a relived sigh escapes my lips. I wasn't sure how to feel about him not being home, but as I locked up my bike and walked toward the front door heavy footsteps sound.

'So dad's not home, huh?' I turn around as four of them stop a few steps in back of Jesse and wait. My eyes wonder all over them, Jesse smirks and then folds his arms across his chest as he walks in the yard. 'This just got way more fun for me. Belikov, I hate to ask a question with an obvious answer, but..' He shrugs and smirks at me with amusement in his eyes and his confident stance irritates me more. 'You have something for me or not?' I take a moment and try to relax my over thinking brain. Open the door and try to find something to defend myself with or just take them all on and see what damage they can do to me now. 'I haven't got all day, Belikov. Either you have it or not, and don't make any excuses this time. Whatever your dad owes goes for you too.' The other boys step closer to Jesse and all have intimidating looks on their faces. There's too many this time, five on one, how's was I going to get out of this. Last time I had help, Rose and her eager baseball swinging. _Rose_. I take a few deep breathes and try to calm myself as they slowly come closer. No wonder my father wasn't home, he probably knew about this and was expecting Jesse to come by.

My mind drifts to Rose again, her smile and laugh, her jokes and sarcasm. How If I hadn't stayed late to help out Mikhail, I would probably be with her right now. Away from this situation and the uncertainty rumbling in my stomach. I never let them see me falter. I swallow and breathe deep. 'This should be easy since no one's here to help you this time. By the way, I saw Rose at school today, she looked good. You fucking her? You have to be, right, that's why she lets you hang around in the store?' Anger and rage spike within me. The wonder of how he knew we hung out at the store making my fists clench and breath heavy. 'Yeah. I mean she must feel real bad for you if she's letting you fuck her. Someone as pathetic and useless as you, maybe that's why daddy hates you. Well, that and what you did to your own mother.' His smirk drops as all I see is red and run straight for him. We fall to the ground and begin swinging at each other. As soon as I see an opening, I take it and make contact with Jesse's jaw. He moans in pain and yells for his friends to "get me". As quickly as I tried to stand up, I'm yanked off of Jesse and punched directly in the face.

After that one hit, I only get a second to breathe and then more fists come flying at me. I'm hit in all kinds of places and the rage and anger grow as I try to fight back. I swing unknowingly and make contact every once in a while. Until they smarten up and now I'm being held back by my arms and endure punch after punch. I can smell the blood leaking from my lip and my ribs sting. I cough after a hit to my stomach and see that Jesse is up again, using me as a punching bag. He laughs and continues to hit and smirk at my agony. 'Come on, Belikov, I thought your used to getting your ass kicked. This should be nothing.' They laugh and he lands another kick to my stomach. 'You're as pathetic as your old man.' That's all it takes for me to become so angry, that I somehow break away from the hold and tackle Jesse to the floor. I see nothing and no one but to hurt. I consume all my pain and release it all over Jesse and push off the other boys trying to pull me off of him.

I hover over his body and clench my fist so tight. As tightly as I possibly could and pound all my muscle and fury against his face. There's pulls on my arms and legs, I pull away and keep Jesse's shirt clutched in one fist as I punch and punch with the other. I can vaguely hear voices yelling to try and stop me, but all I care for is to hurt him. To cause him as much pain as I can. I've lost all my self-control and want nothing more than to hurt who and whatever comes near me. Jesse finally gains some kind of strength and grabs my forceful fist, causing me to lose my balance and then a pair of arms grabs me again. I struggle and fight to break free, but another gains a hold of me and out of nowhere I'm on the ground. I keep struggling to get up and fight, to not let them take me down and give in. I hit another in the face as he tries to keep me down. As he touches his face and prepares to attack me, he's quickly pushed out of the way by a raging Jesse. With some quick hits to my face and ribs, I somehow get my arm free and grab at Jesse's shirt.

He smirks and grabs my arm off of him, twisting it around violently. A snide harsh smirk showing proudly as he twists harder and nods to one of his friends to come closer. 'Break his fucking arm, Ralph'. Hesitantly, the Ralph guy pulls out a metal rod and looks to Jesse again. 'Do it already!' Ralph nods obediently and I try to pry my hand away as he holds the rod over his head. I struggle and struggle to pull my hand away, no matter how hard I try the guys fingers won't loosen up. 'Fucking Break it!' I pull and pull, using Ralph's hesitance to try and get my arm free. A light pain in my shoulder is starting to get stronger and it feels like it's going to rip apart as I'm pulling. Then all of a sudden, with blinding quickness, there's pain enveloping my hand and fingers. I scream in pain as I feel my hand being smashed. It feels like a ton of bricks have been dropped on my hand, my bones aching and feeling like little pieces trapped within my skin. Ralph hits my hand two more times and finally, Jesse tells him to stop. 'You tell your old man he's fucking crazy to try and hide from us. Next time we won't be so nice, make sure he gets the message. And whatever deal you got going on with Rose, you tell her I'll pay actual money for her _services_.' With that, Jesse takes the pipe from Ralph and uses all his force to pound the rod onto my hand once more and the pain becomes too much.

...

If someone hasn't called the cops by now; I'd be surprised. The window on the front door is smashed and the door left wide open. As soon as I found something to wrap my hand with, I went ballistic. Anger and frustration radiating out threw my body and onto the contents of my home. There are lamps, dishes, glass and furniture thrown about. The living room looks as if a tornado has hit it and then it reversed and ran it over again. I was angry. I was fed up, frustrated and unable to control all the emotions taking over me. My head was in a bad state, back to the state I was once in when my mother died. Enraged. It was pure and simple rage. I was angry at Jesse and his followers. I was furious at the fact that I couldn't stop them from hurting me. I was frustrated with all the pain my body was in. I think mostly, no I know, I was most definitely angry with Vladimir Belikov.

All I kept seeing and hearing was how it was him who they were after and once again I was left to take on his problems. Once again I had to fight to survive another day and now my hand is broken. All my anger and frustration was aimed at one person and one person only, and I couldn't wait until he got home. I get to his room in an angry rage and begin assaulting his belongings. There are bottles and clothes scattered around as I kick and pull apart everything in sight. A glass lamp he brought from back home in Russia smashed to pieces. His dresser drawers pulled out and tossed to the floor. His clothes, reeking of cigarettes and vodka, spread out covering his entire floor. Then as I open his closet, I begin pulling down his clothes that were hanging. My one good hand helping to destroy everything important to this man. Then I freeze, I stop as I spot a black box on the ground, under some boots. It doesn't have anything on it and it looks to be unlocked.

I bend down to reach for it and toss the boots out of the way. As soon as my fingers make contact with the box, I can feel the sheer hard cold metal and I open the top. It clicks open and I remove the cover completely. The shiny chrome glints from the light of the closet above. I breathe it in slow and let my fingers linger among the cold shiny surface. A gun. The damn bastard has a gun in the house. It makes me even more infuriated than before, if that's even possible. I take another deep breath and grab the gun. I clutch it in my hand, letting the cool chrome metal meet my heated skin. My index finger automatically makes its way to the trigger, but I don't squeeze. Instead I stand and once I do, I catch a figure standing at the doorway of the very room I'm in. 'What are you doing in my things, boy?' He sneers as his eyes meet the weapon in my hand and then move back up to me.

I swallow hard, my breaths becoming deeper as I take in his appearance. He looks around his room at the mess I've made and glares as his eyes meet mine once again. 'What did you do to this house?' His voice becoming a little louder and carrying an angry tone. I lick my lips and keep my eyes on him. 'Well, boy! Explain!' His yells just make me more frustrated and I clutch the gun harder in my hand. 'It's your fault.' I whisper. His eyes slanting in question and concern. My hand reacts to his sudden movement, as he takes a step closer to me; I raise the gun and point it directly to his chest. He stops and swallows slowly as I keep my position in front of him. 'What are you going to do with that, boy, kill me?' I keep silent as his arms stretch out in a surrender type of matter and he watches my eyes. 'Hmm.. Are you going to shoot me, Dimitri? Is that going to make you feel better?' I know this game. He wants to provoke me to get his advantage, but I won't let him. 'Why waste the bullets?' He glares at my reply and slowly steps closer to me and I back up. 'They were after you not me. I have nothing to do with your deals.'

'You think this will bring you peace, boy? You think you'll get away with this one, huh?' The anger comes back, it never really left, but something has made it stronger than before. He has to constantly remind me of the past. He has to make sure I live life feeling guilty, just so he doesn't have to blame himself. 'This won't bring her back, Dimitri. This won't make anything any better for you! Drop it, boy and I'll let you live.' The red invades my sight once again, my breath picks up and becomes loud and my finger barely squeezes the trigger. The gun cocks and we both stop breathing at the sound. His eyes turn wide and fear passes in them as I try to control my breathing. 'Come on, boy.. Do something, make a move..' The silence catapults into the house and my mind is overrun by memories. Memories of a better time than now. Memories of when I was a boy and my mother would be cooking in the kitchen. Times where she was telling my sisters to be nice to their little brother and include him the games they played.

When I was old enough to learn how to make black bread and every day after school I'd come home and make some. Times when he wasn't around and you couldn't wipe the smile off of my mother's peaceful face. The times where she would lecture me and explain what kind of man I should be. _Violence isn't the answer, Dimka. Be nice to your sisters, Dimka. _The time where I learned the biggest lesson of all, the time I pushed her away from this world and made a mistake that will never leave me. Suddenly the red had faded and all I saw was a poor excuse of a man. Acting as if he wasn't afraid of death, as if I would be doing him a favor and giving into his game. I swallow and grip the gun tighter. His eyes widen more if it was possible and he swallows unsurely. I never retract the gun from the position I held it in, but I release a strangled breath and begin to slowly move my feet. I step to the side and never lose his eyes in my own. We both end up walking an intense half circle as I make my way for the door. Once I'm in front of him, in the doorway of his room, still pointing the gun at him. 'If you run-.' 'What? You're too afraid to come and get me now?' His eyes become darker and I quickly walk backwards to the front of the house. He stays in his position, stuck and unsure if to move. Once I have my bike free, I give him a last look through the window I broke and watch as the man who beats and hurts me; doesn't do a thing.

...

The dump was as good place as any to get rid of the gun. At first I thought to keep it, just in case my father decided to come after me. However, I didn't want to have come to that and have whatever bad blood he got that gun from on me. After going to the dump, I make my way through town and struggle to hold in my emotions. The pain in my hand is still there, but all the adrenaline had put it in the back of my mind. Now, as I ride to my next stop, the pain throbs back to life. My eyes become watery at the agony my body and hand are in. All the memories still fresh in my mind. The way Jesse looked under me as I smashed his face in. The smile my mother gave me when I did something that made her happy. The eyes of my father, staring me down as I held the gun in my hand and for once; had power over him.

All these emotions just dying to be released and off my chest. There was only one place where I felt I could give into them. One place that I knew, I wouldn't be judged for or hurt by. One small house that when I caught sight of it from my bike, I couldn't wait to get there. I pedaled faster as the house got bigger and bigger to me, as my bike made it closer and closer. Finally, the house appears directly in front of me and my bike only makes it to the sidewalk as I drop it and rush up the steps to the patio. I stop before knocking and try to collect myself. A couple of deep breaths and silent words of encouragement before my knuckles meet the wooden door and a tapping sound releases itself. A moment of silence occurs as I hear the light pitter patter of feet against the wood floor come closer to the door. The lock snaps and my breath catches as she opens the door. Her beautiful brown eyes widen and take all of me in as she steps out of the house and closes the door. 'Dimitri, what happened?' Her voice just carries me to the point of no return and I close my eyes to see the darkness as the tears silently fall.

**Another fight, i know.. Next chapter im hoping your going to love. Some Rose and Dimitri greatness (;**

**As usual, thanks for reading, alerts, favz and reviews. Let me know what you think. Next chapter should be up some time during the week. **

**(:**


	9. Chapter 9

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 9:** The Undone and The Divine.

It's odd this feeling of belonging. It isn't odd in a weird "I've never felt anything like this" sort of way or a bad way. It was odd in a good way actually; somehow I felt like this was where I was supposed to be all along. If that makes any sense. The moment I opened the door and my eyes and brain registered that it was Dimitri, that moment had cleared so many things up for me. Things like, why I had missed him and that unknowing of why he didn't show up at the store earlier. I understood now. In fact I found myself angry as soon as I saw his bloody face and the way he closed his eyes as he tried to hide behind his ever unbreakable shield. Which was something I thought could never be broken. And yet, here we are; in a warm embrace of what I feel is belonging.

His arms, lean and toned, wrap themselves around my small frame and radiate his warmth. It was like this blanket of needy, safe, protectiveness that neither of us wanted to break. His scent had creepily lingered to my nose and I inhale the moment. It was strange how much I could like him and keep myself from him all at the same time. This hug had strengthened those feelings even more and even though it was a sad time, I couldn't help but be happy that I did get to see him after all. His body shakes from the sobs he's trying to hold back and from what I'm sure is pain. I just hold him, keep him as close to me as possible before he realizes what we're doing and pulls away. After a moment a deep relaxing sigh escapes him and I take it as my signal to let go. At arm's reach, we face each other and I unconsciously move a strand of hair from his face. 'Come inside, so you can clean up.' He shakes his head no and grabs my hand before I'm fully turned around to walk inside. I face him as he squeezes my hand gently. 'I don't want to be trouble, Rose.' 'It's okay, my dad's already asleep and I was just going to finish some homework.' In reality, I was already falling asleep when I heard him knock, but he was already trying to get away and I didn't want that.

We walk in the house and I lead him up to my room. His hand was still in mine and I made sure to keep the feeling of his skin to memory. Once were in my room, I close the door and he lets our hands go. 'You could sit down; I'm going to get something for your hand.' He nods and sits at the end of my bed, looking around and absorbing the pictures on the walls and clothes scattered about. The mess that is my room. Once I'm back in the bedroom, I sit next to him and open a box of wraps and bandages. 'Abe sometimes gets these really intense nose bleeds, so I use these. We could wrap your hand.' He nods as I reach for his injured hand and begin cleaning the cuts on his knuckles. It was silent as I wrap his swollen hand in the bandage and feel his eyes on me. 'Where's your homework?' 'Huh?' 'You said you were doing homework, I don't see it anywhere..' I shrug, ignoring his question and continue with what I was doing. 'Did I wake you?' His voice softens as he asks this question and I look up quickly into his eyes. His face looks swollen and his eyes are tired, but he avoids me by turning away. 'No, I was already awake.'

He sighs again, this one long and full of so much emotion I look up to him once more. 'You don't have to tell me what happen, but maybe you'll feel better about it..' He shakes his head slowly and looks to me for a long silent moment. He swallows heavily and his gaze is so intense I almost forget what I'm doing. 'I just- I wanted to see you. I _had_ to see you.' I have to look away back to his hand as the need to kiss him corrupts my mind. 'I was kind of wondering what happen to you. I thought-' Shaking my head and getting rid of the words I wanted to say so badly, I force my focus away. 'What?' I shake my head again. 'Nothing. Forget it.' 'No, what were you going say?' I shrug and keep my eyes off of his as I continue. 'I thought maybe you were running away after what happen yesterday.' 'What happen yesterday?' This makes me react by picking up my head to face him and I watch as his eyes reveal nothing. We weren't going to address that kiss issue it seemed, so I just shook my head again and looked back down to our touching hands. 'Um, your hand looks pretty bad. I can clean all the other cuts and stuff, but you should really go to the hospital and get it looked at. It looks kind of gross.' He nods and sighs once more as I stand up to move away and ease the tension.

As I was about to step away, a tug of my hand pulls me back and I end up standing directly in front of him. 'I can't go to the hospital, Rose, too many questions.' He closed his eyes tightly and then licked his bloody lips before putting his gaze back on me. He takes a deep breath and slowly releases it, pulling me a little closer to his body. 'I- I got home and- and Jesse and some of his friends had showed up looking for my father.' His eyes take me in and in them I get the sense that this is him pleading with me, but for what? I nod and sit down next to him on my bed. I waited, I waited for him to find his words and gain the courage to speak. He cleared his throat after a few silent minutes and I squeeze his good hand with both of mine. 'He owes Ivan Zeklos a lot of money and they've been looking to collect..' He looks at me again with those pleading eyes and I still can't quite make out what the look means. 'My father has been hiding out, coming home and leaving at odd hours, but I guess they caught up to him. They showed up and I was there, so I'm supposed to pass the message.' I got the message Jesse had sent. If this was them sending a warning, then I don't want to know what they'll do if they ever _do_ catch Dimitri's father.

Another released sigh and Dimitri let's my hands go. 'We have to tell someone about this.' He snaps his head in my direction and his face becomes blank. His eyes tighten with determination and his hand is quickly squeezing one of my wrists as I attempt to stand up. 'No!' He says a little too loudly, but quickly calms himself and breathes. 'We can't. No one can know a thing about this.' 'Why not? Dimitri, this is bullshit. They could've killed you and your father-' 'My father is the very reason why we can't tell anyone, Roza!' His voice was low and whispered, but his words came out fast with a firm determination and I flinched at the sound. 'You don't understand, you can't say a word, not one word. To anyone. I thought you understood that!' At that he lets my wrist go from his tightening grip and stands from my bed. He paces back and forth for a few seconds and I watch and wonder at what just happened. 'Fuck! I shouldn't- I shouldn't have come here. That was stupid on my part, shit!' I step in front of him quickly and try to touch him in a calming gesture. His feet move too fast and he's muttering to himself in Russian, while pulling at his hair. 'Dimitri..' His voice picks up in volume and he paces around my room. 'Dimitri?' I follow him around my bed and try to grab his arm but he pulls it away steps beside me. He couldn't wake up Abe, that guy was in a deep sleep after taking his meds, but he was starting to freak me out. 'Dimitri, will you just stop!'

He stops at my loud voice, it wasn't a yell, but it was just enough to get him to stop rambling and listen to me. He steps closer to me as I calmly touch both of his shoulders and look him dead in his deep brown eyes. 'You have to calm down, okay. Just relax and breathe, okay..' He shakes his head no and grabs my waist with his good hand, gripping it just tight enough where I can feel his fingers press on my shirt and into my skin. 'You can't tell anyone, Roza. You have to promise, promise me, please! If you say anything I'll get in so much shit for it. You say something to someone and then it gets back to my father and I'm screwed, Rose! That can't happen, okay, I can't-' 'Okay! Okay, chill. You're going to have a panic attack if you don't calm down.' His breath comes out raggedly and his eyes can't stay focused. I grab his hand and lead him to my bed again and sit him down. I give him a minute to calm himself and breathe normally. It's quiet as I watch the worry run over his face. His eyes are wider than before and the panic is screaming to come out again. 'I'm going to get some water, you want some water?' He nods without looking at me and I hesitate at the doorway before leaving him alone.

After checking on a snoring Abe, I make my way to the kitchen and quickly find a giant cup to fill. I make it to the sink and before I can turn the cold water on; I stop and take a deep breath. This was crazy, me not seeing him earlier and then he suddenly appears at my door. The way he looked so broken and alone, the things he was saying and the way he pleaded with me not to say a word about it. It was a little much to take in and I needed a moment to come to terms with it. The want to go and wake up Abe to tell him about Dimitri's father was itching at me, but then I remembered the look in Dimitri's eyes and quickly shook away that thought. I wanted to help him so badly, but I wouldn't know how even if he did let me tell someone. He seemed a little scared about anyone finding out, which irked me because I knew for one that Dimitri wasn't afraid of his father. He had told me so plenty of times. It was a big mystery trying to figure him out and as I filled the cup, I tried to relax myself. I had to go back in there and be the calm one, the reasonable one and try to understand what the hell was going on.

'Here you go.' He grabs the glass and downs the water in mere seconds, releasing a deep long breath right after. A few minutes later and we both were sitting on the edge of my bed in silence. It wasn't awkward or tense; it was actually pretty relaxing and easy. He releases another breath out of his nose and it kind of snaps us both out of our daze. 'I'm sorry.' It comes out in a low whisper and I turn to face him as he watches the wall in front of him. 'It's okay.' He turns to me and I smile sadly at him. 'Are you feeling better?' He nods and looks to his hand holding the cup and taps it with his finger. 'A little, my hand hurts, but I'll be okay.' I nod and look away from him and let my eyes wonder around my room. 'I'm sorry for barging in like this. It's really late; I should've gone somewhere else. I'm sorry.' I smile and shake my head in amusement at him. 'You don't have to apologize, its fine. Besides I thought you wanted to see me?' We turn to each other and I let another light smile show. He just watches. He swallows deeply and keeps his eyes on me. I take in his features, his firm lips and even with the bloody cut across them; look so tempting. His deep brown eyes, wide with adoration and maybe confusion, watch me as I gently take my thumb and wipe some blood from his bottom lip. He stills, but blinks it away as I smile again.

The room is filled to the brim with silence. We sit there and look at each other for a few more seconds. 'I'm not going to tell anyone. I promise.' I saw it in his eyes. He was searching mine to see if he could really trust me and I didn't want to give him a reason to doubt me. When he sees that I meant it, he nods quietly and looks back at his hands. One wrapped in a horrific attempt of helping it heal and the other playing with the cup. 'You're not going to ask why?' I shake my head no and play with the hair that's fallen out of my rubber band, pulling it behind my ear. 'It's none of my business.. And anyway, it's not like you're going to tell me, right?' He looks to me and I get the answer from his expression. I shrug and smile small, quickly facing the wall of my bedroom with all the pictures I've taken on it. 'It's just that..' I wait for him to finish, keeping the pressure off and still facing away, letting him talk on his own. 'I didn't have anywhere else to go and I.. I can't trust anyone else with this.' This is where I turned back to him and watch as the truth sets in his eyes. Now I really didn't want him to pull away and although I had a million questions surrounding my mind. A million reasons to get up and wake up my dad or someone else who could help him out; I nodded in understanding. I held it back and let him breathe in the relief. I watch as he keeps looking at me in that look of amazement I sometimes catch. It's dead silent as I watched him shift into another look. A look I'd never thought I'd see on him.

The glossy effect took over him and he squeezed his eyes shut and suddenly leaned in to hug me. It took me by surprise a little bit, but I didn't let a second waste as I wrapped my arms around him. He buried his face in my neck and squeezed me to his warm body. It was like that was all he needed, all he really wanted in the first place. He didn't cry or sob or make any noise at all. He just kept taking deep breaths and sniffling, trying to hold back from releasing all those things. I reveled in this, I held on to this moment and although it was wrong to feel; it felt good. I felt like I took some weight off his shoulders and Dimitri seemed to be carrying so much of it. 'Thank you, Roza.' I closed my own eyes and squeezed him a little tighter. I couldn't answer him back; if I did I was probably going to lose it. He endured so much and he was too young and good for any of it. We sat there in a long embrace for a while, until we somehow ended up laying down side by side and letting the silence put us to sleep.

.**D**.

Usually the sun would gleam through the old curtains and stained windows of my room. It would cause my eyes to snap open. This time when they do, it's to a dim room where the curtains barley let the sun peek through. I let the darkness set with my eyes and then take in a deep rush of air from my nose and release it. My ribs ache, my stomach feels like there are knots inside of it and my hand is un-moveable. However, I've never felt more at peace. I lay there, in a comfortable warm bed and wait for the dream to fade. It had to be a dream, the way the silence wrapped the room, how even if the blankets were off; I'd still be warm. When I looked at the walls beside me and at the end of the bed, they weren't the boring white stained cages I was used to. They were a light gray, full of pictures of people, flowers and scenery. There was no familiar smell of old cigarettes or enough racket in the kitchen to wake up an army.

There was a calm, relaxed and simple feel to the room. There was peace here. _This had to be a dream_. No loud voice echoing throughout the house rambling about, no clanging of dishes or pots in the kitchen or heavy angry footsteps heading to my door. _Definitely a dream._ My moment of peace was interrupted at the small squeak of the bedroom door opening. The long strands of brown hair fall over her left eye as she slowly peeks in from the door. I just watch and wait to see all of her. 'Hey, you're up.' I nod quietly as she makes her way to the side of the bed and sits next to me. 'How are you this morning? You look a little better, like you got some much needed rest.' 'I did. I slept well, thank you for letting me stay.' She nods as the hair she moved before speaking falls back in front of her eye. A moment passes where we both don't know what to say exactly, so neither of us speaks for a second. 'So, uh-' 'Did you tell your father-' She laughs as we both ended up talking at the same time and I just shake my head. 'Um, I did tell my dad. He's okay with it, I told him you needed a place to stay and he said it was fine.' I nod and attempt to sit up, but the sore feeling on my ribs and tightness of my stomach make me flinch at the pain.

Rose helps me sit up slowly and then gets an unsure look on her face. 'There's something for the pain by the lamp over here. Thought you would probably be hurting more this morning.' I look to the bed side table and see some pills and a glass of water. 'How long have you been up?' She smiles sadly while handing me a pill and the glass. 'For a while.. Abe wasn't feeling too good this morning, so..' She shrugs it off and helps me get comfortable on the bed. There's an unknowing feeling growing in my stomach, other than the soreness and pain. I notice Rose doesn't keep eye contact with me and keeps avoiding it as I watch her face turn grim. She looks as though she wants to say something, but isn't sure how to go about it. I let her work through it and keep silent as she finally faces me. I let a small smile go and she sighs finally opening her mouth to talk. 'Um.. I uh- I had to call the doctor this morning..' I swallow and let my smile fall as I wait for her to finish. Rose looks nervous and turns her head to her lap, where her fingers are fidgeting. 'My dad got kind of sick this morning and I.. I want to make sure that he's okay.' She finally looks to me and nervously awaits my reaction.

I already knew that this little place of peace was going to break any minute. So I had no intention of hoping that I could stay here a little longer this morning before having to find somewhere else to go. I nod at her and flip the blankets off of my body. Sleeping in the clothes I wore throughout the day wasn't very comfortable, but I had to do what I had to do. 'What are you doing?' Rose suddenly asks as I slowly try to pull my legs off the bed. I look up to her, stopping and blink confusingly. 'Going.' 'Why? I mean you don't have to- if you don't to want to- I just thought-' 'I thought you said a doctor was coming?' She nods and watches me anxiously. 'Yeah, she is, but you don't have to leave.' I laugh lowly and sit up when my feet touch the ground. 'I think it's best if I do.' As I struggle to stand up fully, Rose rises as well and helps me as I groan in pain. 'Alberta won't say anything. She's good friends with my dad; if he tells her not to she won't say a thing.' Alberta? I swallow and hold my aching hand to my side as I feel I'm about to fall over and pass out from all the soreness and aches. 'Alberta?' 'Yeah, their friends and I was kind of hoping you would.. You know, let her check up on you. You need to fix your hand.' I think it over while Rose waits for an answer. It was a good idea, but Alberta had already made up her mind if I ever came back worse than last time. This time I'm sure my hand is broken, so I know that she will indeed say something to the wrong people and I didn't need that. All it would do was involve her and Rose, and I wanted to keep them far away from my father as possible.

'I don't think that's wise, Rose. Alberta has already got me on her radar, so-' 'She won't say anything. I promise. I'll tell my dad and he'll convince her not to talk.' I give her a look of hesitance and swallow the conflicted lump of feelings in my throat. 'Just let her look at it, Dimitri, please. What's the worst that could happen?' A lot actually. 'This way we make sure nothing is too serious..' I sigh and give in with a nod and she helps me sit back down with a winning glint in her eyes. I didn't want to agree to this. Alberta could do a lot of things that will end badly for me instead of doing the good she thinks she is, but I couldn't deny Rose. Especially since she's helped me so much already. She moves about the room and finds pants and a sweater to dress in. I watch as she seems so relaxed and comfortable in her home, in her skin. She is something else and the growing affection I catch myself feeling is something else on its own.

'There's breakfast if you want any..' I nod as she walks out of her restroom dressed in a tank, jeans and a sweater. Her hair is down and moves flowingly as she walks to her closet and puts on her shoes. Once I find the strength to stand up again, I step closer to where she is and unknowingly find myself pulling out the long hair that was trapped inside her sweater. She turns at this and our eyes meet. It's wrong to feel this way about her, but it's the most greatest feeling I've felt since forever. I watch as she takes me in and catch myself observing every part of her. Her eyes and lips, her hair and skin, and her smile. The one she's doing now. I find it contagious as I release a small smile of my own. 'What? You keep staring at me all..' I laugh at her and move my eyes over her once again, keeping the details to memory. 'What's it mean?' My expression switches to confusion at her sudden question. 'What's what mean?' She bashfully looks to her feet and then back up to me. After some hesitation, she finally asks. 'It's my name, right? In Russian, Roza means Rose.. You called me that a lot last night.' I blink in surprise and she smiles widely at me, almost as if she wants to laugh. 'Abe speaks a little Russian and I had asked him what it meant earlier.' I nod and smirk at her. 'He told what it was?' She laughs and shakes her head. 'No, he told me to Google it.' We both laugh at that and I nod. 'Yeah, it's your name, Roza. I won't use it if you don't li-' 'No. No, I like it. A lot actually.' 'Okay.' I let a smile show and her eyes move to my lips, but as the moment sets in. I take slow steps back and breathe a ragged breath at the pain in my ribs, cutting the intimate moment to pieces. I can see the disappointment settle in her eyes and it irks me that I can't take it away from her. If only she knew this was for the better.

...

If I didn't know awkward, well, I knew it now. We sat at the table and ate quietly, much like how the beginning of that dinner long ago went. Abe was slowly pacing himself as he ate and Rose's eyes would flick back forth from her plate to him. I could tell she was worried and scared, but Abe didn't seem to let it faze him. The quiet was actually nice, at least for me it was, but for them I knew it was far from that. The moment is interrupted as Abe clears his throat and looks to Rose then to me. 'So, Dimitri, I thought you and the kiz weren't dating?' My -as well as Rose's- eyes both widen and rise to meet the amused ones of her father. He smiles and winks at Rose as she shakes her head and tries to hide behind her hair. I nod at him and shake my head disbelieving that this ill man could still have such a good sense of humor on life. I understood why though, he had a daughter to look after and he was only trying to live to the fullest.

'Well, Dimitri, you seem to be okay. Your ribs are just bruised and there's no internal bleeding. Remember, I want you at my office first thing tomorrow for x-rays on your hand, in case you need surgery. Other than that just get plenty of rest and don't let Abe work you too hard.' I smirk and watch as Rose rolls her eyes at her father. He was going to be okay, just had some infection that should be cleared up in no time. To watch the relief on Rose's face was actually a relief of my own. 'When can I put the young strapping boy back to work?' Alberta gives me a look I can't quite detect as Abe backs up his made up story he told Alberta in order for her to not report my injuries. 'I'm sure Dimitri will be good as new in no time, just watch out for those old attic stairs and falling furniture.' The smug knowing tone in her voice lets me know, we weren't fooling anyone with that bullshit. Still, Abe had played into it very well and myself and Rose had to act along with him so she would buy it. Although, I don't think she did.

**.R.**

I've never felt relief like I was feeling it today. I skipped school and work because of Abe's vomit festival this morning and also cause there was a super-hot beat up Russian in my bed. Last night revealed a lot of things about Dimitri to me and I just wanted to dive in deeper. He struggled with a lot and the way he was watching Alberta as she examined him let me know he had put a lot of trust in me and Abe. I have to hand it to Abe and his awesome skills of lying. That was one hell of a story that Alberta had bought. Well, pretended to buy anyway. It was kind of surprising and amusing watching the old man come up with some strange not to mention gravity defying story to tell Alberta. Hilarious, but strange.

After a long "debate" Abe had finally convinced Dimitri to stay with us for the night. I have to say I was really glad he did, I didn't want him to leave just yet and I liked that he felt he could trust me now. The whole kiss issue was never spoken of, the one that never happened in my room included, but I couldn't keep it out of my mind. Now after a long and eventful day, the two of us were cleaning up the kitchen after Abe had ordered dinner. The old man was already drifting off on the couch as he had to take even more medicine for his infection. 'That was some crazy story your father told.' I laughed and continued rinsing the dishes as Dimitri was drying. 'Yeah, that's the old man for you, always happy to help scheme some sleazy plan.' He laughs and shakes his head and we keep working in comfortable silence. With the kitchen clean and Abe off into bed, the house becomes silent and I make my way upstairs with Dimitri trailing behind me.

I give him my bed and decide to take the couch, much to his annoyance; he kept trying to let me take the bed and him the couch. I had remembered Alberta said he needed to get plenty of rest and I also told him I wanted to keep close in case Abe got sick again. He finally gave in, but wasn't happy about it. I waited in my room as he showered and used some of Abe's old clothes to sleep in. Once I had got changed and helped him get settled, I had turned to leave the room. 'Roza?' I stepped back into the room from the doorway and waited for him to finish. He looked like what he was going to say was hard to get out, so I stepped inside and closed the door. I walked silently to the bed and sat on the edge. Dimitri looked to be struggling and his mouth would open and close every now and then. 'Are you okay?' He looked at me and nodded and I waited silently as he finally spoke. 'Thank you. For everything, for letting me stay here and helping me out. I don't know how I'm going to make it up to you.' I smile and shake my head while my hand unconsciously moves to his shoulder. 'You don't have to make it up to me, I was glad to help.' He smiles sadly and slowly painfully, but surely sits up and our close proximity gives me a good look of his eyes and lips.

Those wonderful full lips I so long to kiss and feel with my own. I take a deep calming breath as I find myself wanting to touch them. To touch him. He doesn't say anything, but keeps his eyes on mine and swallows deeply. 'Um.. I guess I'll be downstairs if you need anything.' I can't look away from him and he hasn't withdrawn eye contact from me either. The silence hangs between us and I imagine all kinds of scenarios that can be used so I don't have to leave. I rack my brain for excuse after excuse, but can't come up with anything. So I sigh and stand up from my sitting position, ready to walk down stairs and hide my face in a pillow. 'Okay, well, goodnight.' I say before turning around and just as I'm taking the first step to walk away from him; he pulls my hand back towards him. 'Roza..' It was a whisper of my name, but the intention in his eyes was clear. Somehow we end up as close as ever and the next thing I know; his soft smooth lips are on mine. They move slowly and firmly against my own and I'm taken by surprise when I end up on top of him. We touch and kiss not stopping, but only to breathe. And when that happens his lips and tongue are on my neck. His hand gripping my hip, and I try not to think about him stopping us again. Our lips attach and now he moves so I'm under him. He didn't use the shirt I gave him, his body was bruised and he had some scars here and there, but I've never seen or felt anything more beautiful. He kisses me deeply and I open my eyes to soak in the reality that this _actually_ happening. He stops to look at me and his questionable expression makes me voice out my thoughts. 'Don't run away again, okay.' He stares and his eyes wonder all over my face until they set themselves back on mine. All he does is nod. A nod and we go back to kissing and touching, and the feeling this finally happening flows throughout my whole body.

**Longest chapter so far. I think. Anyway, theres a lemon in the next chapter, well, slices of a lemon. (worst joke ever). You'll get it when you read it. This is a warning though, im planning on getting kind of graphic (as tastefully as i possibly can).**

**By the way is anyone reading 'A Rebels Tale' by DiamondintheRough17. Good stuff, if your not reading it you might want to check it out.**

**Once again thank you so much for the alerts, favorites, reviews and more are welcome. Ill update soon (:**


	10. Chapter 10

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 10:** All Human Joy Is Precious.

_ I've never been one to experience the feeling of being whole. That was foreign to me, a feeling I thought I'd never get the pleasure of knowing, but I felt that as soon our skin had touched. I feel it as my fingers lightly trace his abs and he plays with my hair now. It was strange how good I felt at this particular moment. This moment where the silence was all I needed to be content. There were no words to describe the flashes of what we had just done going off in my mind. I've had sex before, it was quick and I was kind of drunk, but I knew it wasn't anything like this was. A deep sigh leaves my lips as I find myself just about ready to dose off and sleep in the warm embrace of this mysterious boy. Mysterious in the way that, he hid a lot from me, but I had the feeling I would unravel him even more now. Especially after tonight er this morning._

_His fingers lightly pull and twist my hair with one hand as his other lay wrapped unmoving on his stomach. I want to play with his fingers and lace them with my own, but he can barely move them as it is. Another content sigh leaves me and I close my eyes, but they quickly open at his whispered voice. 'What's wrong, Roza?' I smirk at the accented words and use of my new favorite name. 'Nothing. Nothing at all. What about you?' His low laugh makes his stomach flex and I've never seen anything sexier. 'Nothing much. Well, except that if your father catches us, he most likely will never let me stay here again.' We laugh as I pick my head up and turn to look at his calm relaxed face. 'Doubt it, we could be racing trains and he won't hear us, heavy sleeper. That and his new meds are pretty strong.' He smiles and moves the hair that always falls in front of my eyes. This was awesome, absolutely positively hands down awesome. 'What made you change your mind?'_

_His curious expression shines in the moonlight seeping through the opened curtains. Something I usually kept closed, but forgot to do before our bedroom activities. I have to remember to forget to do that more often. He shrugs and continues playing with my hair as I await his answer. 'You do something that I've never- I never thought I could feel.' 'What?' He swallows deeply and looks away from me, thinking of the right words to say. When he finally finds them, and our eyes become stuck to one another and the emotion that shows in them makes me joyful. 'You make me forget.' 'Forget what?' He takes another minute to assemble his thoughts and let's my hair go, moving his fingers to the tip of my nose all the way down to my bottom lip. 'Everything. Everything bad, all the things that hurt. All the pain is gone.' I blink in surprise at the sudden revelation and try to swallow the lump in my throat that has started to develop. I stretch closer to him and kiss his lips. I linger as he barely moves his own to meet mine, just before he whispers. 'You give me peace.'_

'What's for breakfast?' Abe's booming voice brings me out of my day dreaming. He had just gotten up and headed straight for the kitchen table where a plate of pancakes was waiting. 'Pancakes, kiz?' I nod and remember that I was eating some also and try to push the vivid memories of last night away for later. Abe looks at the plate and then back to me with a confused and questioning gaze. I shrug and continue eating as he sits down slowly, in disbelief that I had gone the extra mile and made breakfast I hadn't made since I was twelve. 'Did you do something wrong?' I shake my head no at Abe's astonished curiosity. 'Did Alberta call with bad news?' Another shake of my head before I drink my orange juice and wait for the next question I'm sure is coming. Abe leans a little closer to the plate and examines it as if it's a scientific experiment gone wrong. After nothing jumps out at him, he slowly sits back in his chair and grabs a fork. After two careful bites, he still chews slowly and watches me while I inhale my own breakfast. 'Did you kill someone and need me to help you hide the body?' I shake my head no and in confusion as he takes another bite. 'Kiz, you haven't made these since you were a girl.' 'I still am a girl, pop.' He rolls his eyes and speaks with his mouth full while gesturing with his fork. 'You know what I mean, akıllı eşek!'

I smile and finish chewing as Abe begins reading the paper. 'I just thought today we'd have pancakes is all.' He looks up at me from the paper and raises his eyebrow. I continue eating as if it's another normal morning and can feel my father's eyes penetrating me with curiosity. He sets down the paper and looks behind him toward the hallway and then stretches his neck to look behind me into the living room. 'Where's your not so boyfriend?' I smile at his comment and roll my eyes finishing off my orange juice. 'He had to go see Alberta for x-rays this morning. He left a few minutes ago.' With that I get up and begin cleaning my mess around the kitchen as Abe still sits and watches me with narrow eyes. I clean and go about the kitchen as normal, but I can feel him watching and wondering at me. 'Kiz?' 'Yeah?' I keep my back turned to him as I start to wash the dishes. 'Do you- Are you and- Do we have to have the talk?' I almost drop the pan in the sink full of water at the words "the talk". The way his voice lowered when he said them and how he seemed so hesitant with the question came as a surprise. I turn and face him but quickly avoid his serious gaze as I feel a blush coming through. 'Um, what talk, pop?' 'You know.. _The talk_. The one about the birds and the bees, and the wind and the trees.' Someone please drown me and drown me now.

**.D.**

The morning seemed brighter. The day seemed perfect and the mood I was in, I haven't felt since I was a boy. I woke up with a smile on my face and a beautiful girl in my arms or arm. This was a weird yet happy way to feel and I couldn't seem to lose the feel of her skin on mine. The way here hair felt like soft strands of silk in on my fingertips. The smile she gave me before opening her eyes and asking if I was watching her sleep. I couldn't help myself; it was hard to believe that I had the opportunity to be with her like that. She was too good for someone like me. Someone with so much drama and unworthiness. As much as I knew that I shouldn't have acted on my feelings, I don't regret it. How could I, she was worth the happiness that consumed me.

_Her voice still seems to move me. She had asked for something I wasn't sure I could give, but I didn't want to disappoint her; not now anyway. Her small hands trail up my stomach and her fingers gently touch my scarred and bruised skin. The feel of her under me, kissing and touching me as I was her; I couldn't comprehend that this was real. I reach and trail my fingers softly over her breast through her shirt and then in one quick move it's off and on the floor. She looks beautiful, exquisite and all the other words that describe how beautiful one could be. 'Dimitri..' Her body squirms under me, her skin raised in goose bumps as I run my lips and tongue over her bare cool skin. This is luck or I'm truly blessed. 'Belikov!'_

A loud deep voice snaps me out of my daze and Eddie appears directly in front of my face. I look to the side of me where a nurse is trying to hide her smirk and then back to Eddie. 'You look like you were stuck on stupid just sitting there drooling.' I wipe my chin and find nothing there. I glare at Eddie as the nurse snorts a laugh and Eddie waves me over. I walk down the hallway following him and try to straighten myself out before seeing Alberta. I know it would be stupid to expect her to still believe the story Abe gave her, but I was ready to stick with it if I had to. 'My aunt will be here soon, she's with another patient.' After I sit on the chair in the corner of a plastic glove smelling room, Eddie tells me to take off my shirt and begins unwrapping my arm.

'So you're giving me my x-ray doctor Rinaldi?' He stops to glare at my name for him and shakes his head disapprovingly. 'I told you I'm not with her.' 'Yeah, but you with her practically the whole time at that party..' He shrugs and carefully places my broken arm in some concoction, then moves away to a computer. 'So, I like to keep some things to myself, Belikov.' I smile and shake my head. 'I guess we all have our secrets.' He nods and clicks something on the computer then a black and white picture of my arm appears. 'Speaking of secrets..' I look to him from the screen next to me and see a glint of something in his eyes. 'How'd you get my aunt to believe you were working for Abe Mazur?' I shrug and look back to a new picture that was just taken. 'I was.' He laughs smugly and clicks away on the computer. 'Yeah, right. Is that why you've been hanging out with Rose so much? Mase, said you're at the store almost every night, drooling over her. He said it's like the sickest puppy dog look he's ever seen.' I look to him and his easy going banter, but find myself annoyed that nothing is sacred in this town. 'We're just friends, besides it sounds like your friend is jealous.' Eddie shrugs and begins walking back to me after finishing. 'Mase has always had a thing for Rose. She doesn't see him like that though, so he kind of thinks he needs to protect her.' 'Rose can protect herself. She's not like most girls.'

I stop myself from saying anything more and give myself away. Eddie releases my arm from the thing and watches me curiously while giving me back my shirt. 'So you do like her.' I snap my gaze to him and stay silent. He shrugs and laughs it off. 'Hey, don't mind me. Rose is a big girl, but don't expect everyone else to be overjoyed that you and her are-' 'We're just friends.' 'Whatever you say, Belikov. I'm just telling you, not everyone is as understanding as me.' I put my shirt back on and follow Eddie out of the room and into Alberta's office. 'Hey, you know I'm just teasing right?' I turn to Eddie as he stands at the door ready to leave and nod. 'Rose is a good person and she deserves to be happy. So do you, but just be careful. Especially when everyone finds out, I don't want Rose to end up hurt.' I watch the sincerity in his eyes and nod. 'Neither do I.' At that, Eddie nods at me and exits the room.

...

Alberta has been looking over the x-rays for the past twenty minutes now and I itch to leave so I can sneak back home and get some clothes before heading to school. If I'm honest, I just mostly would like the day to end so I could see Rose. So I can kiss her and be with her, be happy with her. 'Well, Dimitri, you broke three of your knuckles and your thumb is out of place. We could fix that and cast your arm for a few months, and then it will heal on its own. You just have to be more cautious when helping Mr. Mazur clean his attic.' The smug and knowing look in her eyes tell me exactly what I thought, she didn't buy one bit of that story.

All I do is nod and stay quiet as she writes me another prescription. The silence becomes a little too silent and my eyes are suddenly everywhere of Alberta's office as she fills out paper work. 'I know that isn't what happen, Dimitri. I'm not going to hound you for the truth, but I am going to say that if it was your father's doing; please don't drag Mr. Mazur and Rosemarie in it. They have enough to deal with.' It's quiet as I ponder this, of course Alberta would know what she's talking about. She had to deal with my father before and it wasn't pretty, but she was right. I shouldn't drag Rose and her father in my mess, but how could I resist now. Now since I got to be with Rose finally and I know I feel something for her. Something that's not easy to come to terms with, but something I'm not ready to lose either. I open my mouth to speak and reassure her I won't let anything happen to Rose, but Eddie opens the door before I could do anything. 'Phone aunt Alberta, it's the hospital.' She rises and gives me a look saying this discussion isn't over and then leaves the room.

Eddie comes further into the room with a sad almost worried look on his face. It's a grim look and I know I'm not going to like whatever it is he has to say. I rise to my feet and we meet in the middle of Alberta's office. 'What, what's wrong?' Eddie swallows and quickly looks to the door before looking back at me. I wait and it feels like forever until he finally opens his mouth. 'The hospital called looking for your dad. He was in a hit and run accident last night, he had some injuries, but this morning he left without checking out. The police were there looking to question him, they said there might be foul play. No one can find him.' I swallow and say nothing. My mind developed thought after thought of what could've happen and what did. I didn't feel sorry for him; all I felt was the empty pit in my stomach wanting to swallow me whole. He's running, running from something or someone and I have to figure it out before he makes it a bigger problem.

I give Eddie a nod and thanks as I make my way to the door. Once I'm out of the clinic I head straight for my bike, knowing where I have to head next. I had thought that maybe I could have a break from all of my fathers drama, but it didn't look that way. As I'm heading through the streets at full speed, another thought occurs to me; _Rose._ If anything happens and I'm sure something would, I couldn't risk her getting involved or ending up hurt. She was too important for any of this shit and she had enough to deal with. _Enough to deal with._ Alberta's words surround my mind and I think of all the ways I could keep her and deal with my father, but there aren't any. Not one thought or idea that will help me stay as happy as I was this morning with her. Then one comes and it's pretty clear what I have to do. How I have to protect her and her sick father from anything to do with my father. It will be ugly and I'll hate myself for disappointing her. She'll most likely won't want anything to do with me, but if this is how it has to be; I'll do it. I'll do whatever it takes and walking away is it. For the better.

**.R.**

_ His fingers were rough and callused, but they felt gentle in everything they did. The way he touched my body and left heat and goose bumps all across my skin. His tongue and lips would leave trails of what felt like fire over my neck, then my stomach and on my lips. His body was a little heavy, but warm and generous as he hover on top of me; moving deep inside of me. I held his shoulders in a firm grip and tried to move as best I could with him. I could feel the soft yet rough skin of a scar that was under my palm, I made sure to take in all of him. His body was perfect, cuts and muscles flexed and moved as we touched and felt each other. His lips would sometimes let out light whispers of Russian, I didn't know what they meant, but the look in his eyes was all I needed. He was enjoying this as much as I was and that made me want him more._

_The way his muscles flexed as he moved us in a sitting position and held me closer to his naked body. It was perfect. I could feel him, all of him, inside me. So I took the lead and he moved with me as I eagerly kissed him as hard as I could. There was no noise in the room or even the house. I was too busy to notice if there was, because all I could focus on was him holding me and how he finally gave in. His hands slowly stroke my back as I keep the movements between us going. He kisses my neck as I clutch his body as close as I possibly could. There's only our heavy breathing and the sound of his kisses hanging in the room and I'm alive. I cup his face and our lips once again meet eagerly. He taste like a chilled sweetness and a little of me. The memory of what he did before this brings a smile to my face and a little side out of me that causes my hips to move deeper into his. At this, I pull his body towards mine and lay back on the bed and he's over me once again._

_He smiles and I return it as he lifts my leg and places it over him, making the feel of him in me even more amazing. I close my eyes and kiss him deeply. He pumps a little faster and I have to stop myself from the sensation of it causing a loud moan to almost escape. As I breathe and move under him, my hands move on their own and end up on his ass. I squeeze gently and it makes a very sexy grunt sound from his throat. It makes him pump harder and deeper, and I find myself about to unwind. I push him deeper into me, then my hands trail up his back slowly and soft. I grip his hair in-between my fingers and we instantly find each other's lips. His tongue licks at my lips and then it's back in my mouth massaging my own. He felt so good and it made me realize that I could do this with him forever_.

_'Rose..' I could vividly remember the way his tongue felt on my body and when it made its way down to my thighs. His kissing getting slower and then finally they met my- 'Rose?' Then the way he smiled as I watched his eyes the whole time he was down there. The way he looked so focused and so lovely at the same time. The way his fingers dug into my thigh and held me in place as he licked and sucked on my- 'Rose!' How it made me feel as if I wanted to explode right into his mouth, but just before that happen, I pulled him up to me gently by his hair and kissed him. He groaned and pushed me back into the bed and with one arm raised mine over my head. He held it there and we kissed some more, but I needed him closer. So with quick and ease he spread my legs open with his and entered me suddenly with his huge- 'ROSE!'_

I shake my head back and forth and blink in order to focus on Mason's confused gaze. He stares at me questioningly for a few seconds before speaking. 'What the hell were you doing?' I glare at Mase and look around to notice we had caught the attention of a nearby shopper. I shrug and forget I couldn't hide behind my hair because it was up and out of my way. 'Sorry, thinking about something.' 'No shit. You okay, you looked a little.. Distracted.' I shrug again and nod at him, hoping he'll leave as quickly as possible. I was still kind of mad at him for yesterday. I was in fact very distracted, but I wasn't going to tell Mason exactly why. 'My dad said to close your register and the after you finish stocking you could go.' I nod again as he steps away, but quickly comes back to face me and hesitates for a few seconds. 'What do you want, Mason?'

He sighs and steps a little closer to me as I begin counting whatever is in the register. 'Are you- are you still mad at me for last night?' Last night was not something I was mad about. Well, not with Dimitri, but Mason was a whole different story. 'Yes, actually I am.' He sighs again and begins rubbing the back of his neck. He's got more to say, but I cut him off before he can give me whatever reason he thinks will make things okay again. 'Look, Mase, we're friends and we agreed to that a long time ago. I'm thankful you feel the need to look out for me, but I can take care of myself, okay?' He releases a deep breath and once again before he speaks, I cut him off. 'And another thing, leave Dimitri alone, okay? He's my friend and we're going to be together whether anyone likes it or not. So I don't want to hear about how much trouble he is and all that other stuff okay?' He doesn't speak or look like he's even breathing for that matter. The shocked and confused look he gives off makes me a little uncomfortable and I think about what I had just said.

I didn't mean for it to come out that way or for it to sound the way it did. I knew, however, that's the way he took it. I wasn't really sure why what I said had made it out that way, but the thought of being with Dimitri. The actuality of being with him in that way that Mason had thought, well, it wasn't a bad vision. I knew last night had brought us closer, but I was still unsure of where that left us. This morning was actually pretty good. I woke up to him staring at me and I had to admit; I could get used to that. That feeling of having something for myself, I loved Abe and liked taking care of him, but I longed to be with someone the way I was with Dimitri. He made me happy and I especially liked that I could take all his troubles away by just being there with him. 'You're seriously dating that clown?' I glare at Mason and roll my eyes, closing the register and heading to the back room with him following.

'That's not helping me forgive you, you know?' 'I don't give a shit. You're not a very good listener are you, Rose? Did I not say that guy was playing you and is tr-' I stop and turn to face him, seeing the jealous and angry look in the blue eyes of a guy I once thought didn't have a hateful bone in his body. 'Trouble, yeah, I know. Mason, I'm serious. If you want to be my friend then let's be friends, but don't judge the people I choose to have in my life. It's my life and that's it. Stop acting like a jealous baby and leave it at that.' With that I turn from him and continue to walk away. 'When he hurts you, don't come crying to me.' I ignore his yelling and continue on with my work.

...

_'Did you tell your dad what happen with Jesse?' He shakes his head and pulls me tighter to his body. We were spooned together, naked and tired from all the bedroom activities. 'No, I didn't get the chance to.' My head lay on his good arm and his injured one was hanging over my side, every once in a while his fingers would move and touch my stomach lightly. 'What do you mean?' He sighed and the moment he spoke I could lightly feel his breath against the back of my neck. 'When he came home.. I just wanted to get the hell out of there. I had to get away as fast as I could. I was in his room, messing up all his stuff.' 'Why were you doing that?' He laughed through his nose lightly and shook his head. 'I was angry. I was mad at him because they beat me for something he did.' I turn around and touch his chest. 'If you- if you do go back, what will happen?' He shook his head and swallowed deeply. 'I don't know, Roza.'_

I have never been at work and not have Mason not be; Mason. He was quiet when he passed me and avoided me during break, he even skipped lunch. It was weird; I had always thought Mason understood where we stood in each other's life. I guess I was wrong, but it saddens me that now our friendship was kind of messed up. If we even still had a friendship. 'Roza?' I turn toward the voice I was already missing and smile at him. 'Hey, thought I wasn't going to see you until later?' I stood from my place on the floor and take the few steps to get to him. Once I'm close enough I lean against him and kiss his cheek softly. He smiles and takes my hand, squeezing it lightly. 'So what happened with your hand is it going to fall off?' He smirks at my joke and shakes his head no. 'Broke my knuckles and my thumb was out of place, but everything should heal nicely. According to Alberta.' I nod and smile at his modesty. His eyes carry something in them and I'm unsure of what it is.

Honestly it's making me a little uneasy and his silence isn't helping. 'Are you okay, you look like something's bothering you..' He swallows and looks down to his feet purposely avoiding my eyes. I wait for his answer and notice Mason watching from the plain sight of his cash register. I avert my eyes back to Dimitri and squeeze his hand reassuringly. 'Hey, what's wrong?' He looks up to me and as soon as our eyes meet I get that feeling. That bad feeling swimming around in my stomach and I kind of have a notion of what's coming. 'Can we go somewhere to talk?' I hesitantly nod and lead him out back to the old bench.

'What's going on?' He sighs loud and deeply, his eyes avoid mine and are everywhere else. My stomach ties up in nervousness and the silence deepens. 'Dimitri..' He faces me at the firm tone I use and I can see it in his eyes. 'Rose, I think it's best if.. If maybe, we don't hang out anymore.' The cold hits me sudden and fast. I feel myself fold my arms over my chest and wait for him to say something else. To change his mind or tell me he was kidding, but it doesn't look too likely. 'There's too much going on right now and.. I can't- I don't think it's wise that I drag you into it.' I stay silent and watch him as he struggles with what to say next. I wanted to ask what it was exactly he was talking about; I wanted to see if I could convince him to give us chance. However, I knew this about him already. Things got serious, so he was running. I found myself becoming frustrated and I didn't want to be, but I was also getting sad. 'You said you weren't going to run away..' I watch as he closes his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He lets another deep sigh out and then his hand moves into his pocket.

'Sometimes, you have too. I don't want to hurt you, but this is something I have to do. Sometimes it's the only way.' He had made up his mind and that I could see. It just made him seem weak to me and I hated that I thought that about him. 'What about last night, what was that? I thought- I thought that we were..' I couldn't finish because the lump growing in my throat was about take over, but I didn't want to cry in front of him. Something within me knew that he could still do something like this. He could still hurt me by shutting me out once again and that's exactly what he was doing. I hated that I let him make me feel this way and that I thought he was different than everybody had said. 'Please understand, Roza. This is for the best. I can't put you at risk, you don't deserve th-' 'No, you just don't want to be with me. Mason was right about you..' He didn't say anything else after that and as I watched his face fall in disappointment, I couldn't help but not feel sorry for him. With the silence making it harder to breathe, I watched him for a few more seconds and waited. He didn't say anything. So with a sigh, I turned away and walked back in the store, leaving him standing there.

**akıllı eşek (smart ass) in turkish.**

**Once again, thanks for reading, alerts, favs, and reviews. Please feel free to do any of those after reading this. The next chapter will be up Sunday or later, kinda busy this weekend.**

**To Caza101 & irene77 I was finally able to get back to reviews, but not yours. Anyway, thank you so much for them and the support and the complements. Im truly thankful your both enjoying the story and i hope you will continue to do so.**

**Thanks (:**


	11. Chapter 11

****Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 11**: Everybody Lets You Down in This Brief Hole of a Town.

School was a blur, work couldn't go by quick enough and when I got home; Abe wasn't feeling good. So he went to bed without dinner and I cleaned. Silence, I was covered in it. Thoughts racked my mind and I felt little, almost non-existent. I was confused, angry and frustrated with everything that's happen in the last seventy-two hours. I won't lie and say I'm not curious about what Dimitri did or where he is at the moment. I didn't see him at school and for some stupid reason; I caught myself looking to the door every few minutes at work. It bothered me. What happen that he was scared away, was it me? He said he was doing it for the better, but why. It never left my mind; the way he looked like he knew what he was doing would hurt me. The way he tried to explain everything without giving anything away. I didn't understand, why didn't he want me? I took his pain away, right?

Then there was the whole Lissa fiasco at school today. That left me with even more confusion and anger. I was so frustrated I had to distract myself with homework and trying to sort out my college applications. How could she, she was my best friend. How could Mason? I mean I get it your mad at me, but telling everyone my business. As if I wasn't already in a crappy mood, I had walked right into a trap with Lissa at lunch today. I felt bombarded and left the table in an even worse mood. Then I had to work with the big mouth jerk that went and told every one of my friends I was sleeping with Dimitri. They didn't need to know that and why the hell did he assume we had already slept together? To say the week was bad was an understatement. It was shit, pure and simple.

...

_ 'So, where have you been lately? Did you forget about your real friends?' I place my tray full of food down on the table and hesitantly sit down next to Mia. Lissa had a playful tone in her voice, but I saw something else in her eyes. 'I've been kind of busy, I guess, with work and all.' I decided to ignore Lissa's comment about my real friends and began to eat my pizza. It was quietly awkward for a few minutes until Christian decided to break it. 'So, Rose, how's your dad these days? Still making fun of your bad cooking?' I roll my eyes at his smirk and continue chewing before speaking. 'He's actually doing okay. We kind of had a mishap the other morning, but he's okay now. And my cooking isn't that bad.' Christian snorts a laugh as Mia and Lissa have been quiet the whole time. I glance at both of their stoic faces and then continue to eat as if this awkward silence is normal._

_Something was off about them. The atmosphere wasn't very comforting and Lissa wasn't her usual happy optimistic self. I let it linger though and kept to eating my food. I could feel their awaiting gazes on me as I ate. It was tense and awkward, not the normal relaxed laughing you usually hear at our table. Christian seems to be the only one being normal or maybe he was acting that way. I couldn't tell, but the quiet was itching at me and it was beginning to drive me crazy. I look up to everyone's eyes as I chew and Christian avoids me by turning the other way. Mia also looks out to the window, suddenly finding something interesting. It was just Lissa who stared back at me and I knew something was up. 'Is there something I need to know?' As the other two kept silently avoiding me, Lissa just shrugged and looked down to her plate moving her un-eaten food around. 'I don't know, Rose, is there?' I watched as she looked back up to me with something I couldn't make out._

_I waited for what seemed like ever for her to continue talking, but she just stared right back at me and waited herself. 'Liss, what's going on?' 'You tell me, Rose. You're the one who's been ditching us for the weirdo.' The surprise that ran through me as she stayed looking at her plate was sudden. Lissa had complained about Dimitri before, but this was different. Things were different; it was like she knew more than she led on and I wanted to know how and what. I look toward Christian and Mia again; both were quiet and seem to be waiting for my reply. They weren't very much help and Lissa seem to be getting a little impatient. 'Ditching? Liss, we were just hanging out. It's not a big deal; we were friends just like you and me.' I was trying to hold back the rush of emotions going through me. There was anger, frustration and most of all confusion. Why was she mad at me for making another friend? 'That's not what I heard. I heard you two are getting a little too close for comfort. What are you thinking, Rose? Dimitri... of all guys to hook up_ _with, that's the one you choose?' My curiosity sparked and I wanted to know everything else that she knew. What did she hear and from who? The snarl she spoke with and the disgust in her eyes made me feel small. It must be that bad that I "hooked up" with Dimitri. 'So what if I did? What's it to you?'_

_If it wasn't silent before, well, it sure was now. Mia had turned to me after I spoke and Christian had just kept his head down, but I knew he too was surprised at my words. Lissa huffs and gives me a wide eyed look of confusion. 'First of all, ew! Secondly, what the hell are you thinking and thirdly; are you that desperate?' I stood quiet and waited for her to finish. The anger was suddenly rising out of me and not to mention I was already feeling a little humiliated from Dimitri. Now she had to go and add this. 'Geez, Rose, he's like poor and always getting beat up, and not to mention his dad is like the scum of the earth. What do you feel sorry for him or something? Mason was right; you must be desperate for company. Although, I don't know why, you do have us.' So many words and thoughts occurred at that moment. How could she say something like that to me? How could Mason say and do something so hurtful toward me? Did he really hate me that much? I try to calm down and think clearly though, there was already so much on my mind from last night. I just wanted the day to end. So I could go home and forget everything had happen and spend time with the old man. He would always make me feel better about whatever was bothering me. So taking a deep breath and swallowing my anger, I calmly spoke. 'What's wrong with hanging out with Dimitri? Were friends, just like you and me, what's wrong with that?' Even though I was sure I most likely would never talk or see Dimitri again. I wanted to know the real reason she didn't like him. I wasn't going to tell her that whatever did go on between me and him had already ended. She didn't need anymore proof that what everyone said about him was true. 'That's the thing, Rose; he's not like you and me. He's- I don't know, he's..'_

_Her lack of explanation bothered me. It made me feel worse for putting myself in a position to get close to Dimitri. 'What, he's what, Liss?' As calm as I spoke, the fury was aching to come out. The frustration and pain of Dimitri's words and the fact that Mason was running his mouth was consuming me with feelings that I was losing control with. 'Different. He's scary and weird, always coming to school in blood and stuff. I mean be his friend, but don't lower your standards and throw yourself at the guy.' Something sparked within me. Whatever Mason had told them, she believed and it hurt that she didn't give me a chance to explain. 'Is that what you think? You think I fucked some poor weirdo because I felt sorry for him?' She didn't say anything, but her eyes had answered for me and it just pissed me off even more. 'You think I lowered myself to screw him because I was desperate?' Once again she didn't answer and it only infuriated me more. Everything was catching up with me at this very moment. Dimitri ending whatever happen between us, Mason gossiping like some little girl and now Lissa. Someone who I thought was my best friend. Someone who was supposed to be there for me and support me no matter what. She was judging me and just from something that she supposedly heard. The silence seems to seep into the whole room as my voice was now getting louder. 'Do you!' She continued to stare down to her plate and avoid my eyes and question._

_I could feel everyone's eyes on me and even though I didn't care what everyone thought or was going to say; I looked out toward them anyway. I felt incredibly small. Insignificant. My best friend had just basically called me a slut and the boy -who even though hurt me- still meant something to me poor and below me. Below her and everyone else because he had trouble in his life and kept everyone away. 'Well?' I waited for a few more minutes as she finally looked up to me and shrugged. She just shrugged and stayed silent. I nodded in understanding in hurt and frustration. 'Okay.. I'll just go and continue to be desperate. I'll keep screwing the poor weird guy because I feel sorry for him.' I rise to my feet and grab my backpack and the tray of food._

_Once I get a few inches away from the table, she calls out to me. 'Rose! Rose, wait!' I continue to walk outside the cafeteria and her voice trailing behind me. I hear her footsteps as she is now running after me and then in a flash she's at my side. 'Leave me alone, Liss.' 'Will you wait, please?' Her plead came out in a soft tone of voice and it angered me more. I stop and turn to face her watching as she now seems afraid. 'For what! So you could shit all over me again? So you could make fun of me for wanting to be with him?' She steps back from my close proximity and holds her hands out toward me in a stopping gesture. 'No! Rose, I wasn't trying to do that. I was just-' I don't let her finish. 'What?' I yell in her face and she flinches at the sound. She takes a step forward and yells right back. Her fear_ _now seeming to evaporate. 'I just don't understand what you're doing with him is all!' A small moment of silence occurs. It makes me think of what she's asking. I didn't understand it myself. I felt drawn to this boy, a pull I didn't understand or try to. I just wanted to be close to him. He seems to always appear in my thoughts and I would wonder about him through the day. I liked him and I knew that, I just didn't know why._

_However, seeing as of right now I would probably never see him again it didn't matter. So I left her question and a lot of my own unanswered. 'You don't need to understand, no one does. He's my friend.. And I wanted to be with him. That's it. That's all.' Her eyes had caught something in my statement. I quickly went through the words I had just said and tried to catch myself before she spoke. 'You like him don't you?' Shit. There it was, obvious to her and still a mystery to me. I decided to play it off and act like I knew what was going through her mind. 'That's kind of why we hung out, Liss.' My voice much calmer and lower. Her eyes still held that revelation expression though. 'No, I mean, you like him like him. As more than just a friend..' I was still too angry to figure it out myself. I kept my guard up and just shrugged. 'So what?' Her eyes changed back to the surprise and disgust as she had before, back in the lunch room. She took a moment to take it all in and so did I. She made a lot of sense in a way, a really mean way. 'Nothing, I just think you could do better.' And then crushed it all again with her last words. 'That's funny; he says the same about you.' It wasn't true -sort of- but I wanted to hurt her as much as she had hurt me. After that, I had walked away and left her there, standing alone._

_..._

'Rosemarie..' I sit up from my position on my bed and see my father standing in the doorway of my room. He's still in his pajamas and looks a little tired, but better than he did earlier. 'Pop, are you okay?' He nods and takes a couple of steps into my room. 'I'm fine, kiz. What about you? You look like you could use a grill cheese.' I sigh and stare at the gentle softness of Abe's eyes and find myself smiling at his words. 'Actually I think I could.' With that, we make our way to the kitchen and Abe begins getting the food from the fridge. I sit at the table and watch as my father prepares to make us grill cheese. It makes me smile to see him back to the way he used to be before getting sick. It was like the old times when I was younger, but now it was different. This morning he was fine, but when I had got home he looked a little flushed and tired. He moved about the kitchen as if nothing was wrong and it made me think of how life would be when_ that_ time came. My smile drops and my eyes begin to blur at the forming tears.

I would be alone when that time comes. I would have no one but myself and even though I knew this. It didn't mean I was prepared for it. 'Kiz, what's on your mind?' I close my eyes tightly at his voice and shake away the thoughts along with all the other things I was feeling. 'Nothing much, old man, just don't burn my sandwich.' He laughs and continues cooking, flipping the bread over in the pan. 'So you're worried about your sandwich? That doesn't explain the glum mood you've been in since coming home.' I sigh and fold my knees to my chest. The old man may love to give me a hard time and poke fun at me, but he knew when to be serious. I shrug and lean my chin on my knees then feel my father's gaze on me. 'Come on, kiz. You can't hold it in forever.' Another long sigh leaves my lips as my thoughts scramble on where to start.

'Pop, you ever hear the stories about Dimitri and his mom?' He turns back around to face the stove and flips the sandwich again. 'Once or twice. Why?' I take a moment to let the question settle in my mind and then look to my father while I ask. 'You think it's true, that any of the stories going around are true? You think he killed his mother?' A long moment of silence lingers between us and I wait as Abe thinks it over. 'Do you think it's true, kiz?' I hated when he did that. 'I asked you first, old man.' He turns around to face me and smiles, and then quickly turns back to the stove. 'My opinion doesn't matter, yours does. So what do you think?' It kind of surprised me when he asked that. There a million things I wanted to let out and get off my chest. Why did Lissa say any of those things, what's Mason's problem? The question that I wanted answered the most was about Dimitri. What was he hiding and what happen that he had ended things before they even got a start? 'I think there's more to it than people know or that he lets on.' Abe turns back to me again and in his eyes there's a proud glint seeping through. 'Then that's all that counts, kiz.'

As we were eating I kept all the questions surrounding my mind at bay. It was quiet as we both sat there, but every once in a while I felt Abe's eyes on me. 'Are you going to find out? We both know you want to.' I snap my gaze to him and shrug, thinking of the words that Dimitri had told me. _Sometimes you have to run away_. 'Probably not.' 'Why? It's not like you to give up and let things go.' He was right, but did I really want to go and make more of a fool of myself in front of Dimitri. Did I really want to prove Mason and Lissa right and waste more time on someone who obviously doesn't want me? 'There's no point, I don't think we'll see much of Dimitri anymore.' I get up to put my plate in the sink and rinse it. Abe snorts and I turn to face him. 'Why is that, kiz?' I shrug and turn back to the sink. 'I don't know, Pop. He keeps a lot of things from me, from everyone really.' 'I'm sure he has his reasons to, kiz. Maybe he thinks it's best that way or maybe he's trying to protect you.' Abe's words made me realize something, maybe he was trying to protect me, but from what?

It was like I said; Dimitri had kept a lot from me. Things about his father and pretty much his life. I wanted to know him, to know the real him. The one who would make me laugh and forget all the bad shit going on. The real Dimitri who when he kissed me, it felt like this electric pulse that made me react to his every move. When he held me and when we were together I can honestly say it was the happiest I've been in a while. The feeling of being with someone who I thought wasn't going to go away. However, it didn't matter now, because that's exactly what happen. Then and here at our old kitchen table, I had decided I wasn't going to be angry at Dimitri anymore. I was just going to let him go and move on as if nothing happen. Or mattered, maybe that was the way it had to be. 'Maybe your right. I'll just let it go I guess.' I got up to go back to my room thinking this was it, but at least I took a chance. 'You should fight.' I stopped at the door way of the kitchen and turn to face Abe. He looked as if he was remembering something, like he was back somewhere in the past. I had seen that look a few times before, it mostly occurred when he remembers my mother.

'See I didn't fight kiz. I didn't fight her when she wanted to leave. I just let her go. You.. You should fight though and don't give up. Never give up and you never let them go. Not without a fight.' He finally looked up from his plate to me and held a strong gaze. It was a little scary because I knew he was dead serious about what he was trying to tell me. I didn't know why though. Dimitri made it pretty clear that we weren't a good idea and I didn't want to put myself out like that again. 'Pop, sometimes you have to give up.' His eyes turned hard and determination shined clear in them. 'No. Not you, that's an excuse, Rosemarie. I know you and you deserve anything you want. Everything.' His firm tone was a little surprising, but clear as I took it in. We stared at each other for a couple of seconds and I knew he wasn't going to back down from this. 'Why are you pushing this, old man? You're supposed to be angry and want to kick his ass. You're supposed to tell me things like there's plenty of fish in the sea and no guy is worth my time if he doesn't want me. Why are you pushing?' He closed his eyes and swallowed deeply.

The silence still aiding him in the strength of his words. I couldn't understand why he didn't want me to give up. Especially on someone who I had felt betrayed my trust and hurt me, someone who constantly pushed me away. 'True and there more fish, but you want that one. I can see it, kiz, I know that feeling.' I was about to tell him that I wasn't even sure what my feelings for Dimitri were, but before I could get the words out, he cut me off. 'I promised I wouldn't leave you alone. I keep my promises, Rosemarie, you know that.' 'Pop, he doesn't want- he just pushes me away, there's no point.' He watched as I tried to explain in frustration why it wouldn't work. Why I wanted to walk away and forget I ever talked to Dimitri. All I could see in him was that he wasn't going to let me. So I stood quiet and waited for him to say something, to give me a good reason to not give up. 'I trust him, kiz. He'll keep you safe and you'll give him what he needs, what he deserves. You'll love him, kiz. We know everyone needs love.' It was clear to me then, why Abe had easily got Dimitri to talk. How much he liked it when I told him Dimitri was visiting me at work and when he had stayed over. He knew he was okay with me and that I was safe with him. It was all a part of his plan.

**Sorry for the late update, life got kind of crazy and i ran into some writers block with this chapter. It isnt my strongest work but i tried.**

**The next chapter is going to explain some things everyone has been asking about and it will be up quicker than this (hopefully).**

**Thank you all so so much for the 50 reviews! I was not expecting that much, so thank you lots. And also for the alerts, favs and future reviews if you choose to leave one (:**


	12. Chapter 12

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 12**: Lovers At A Great Divide.

It surprises me how much the old man still seems to make some kind of sense of the world. Especially at such an old age. He knew a lot and he knew me, so ultimately his convincing words would soon make an impact. It was just a matter of when. Last night I didn't get very much sleep, my mind seem to be in overdrive and I found myself coming to a conclusion. It was about everything, all that went on this past week and what a crazy week it was. This morning breakfast was silent as I pondered over my thoughts and feelings. Abe didn't even attempt to make conversation and just read the paper as I ate in silence. It was a first time in a long time that we had ever had that kind of moment. It was sort of a silent understanding.

It seemed the whole day had this silence about it and school was no exception. I sat in class and actually focused, I ate lunch alone and every time I passed one of my "friends" I avoided them at all cost. Well, almost all of them, I spotted Eddie walking toward my car as I was getting ready to leave for work. 'Roses, couldn't find you anywhere today?' I shrugged and closed the passenger door and began walking around the car to the driver side, where he was standing. 'Yeah, well, I'm not exactly too keen on being found today.' He nods and smiles sadly at me, letting me know without words that he had heard of the fallout between me and everyone else. 'So you and Belikov, huh?' I close my eyes and sigh at the statement. 'Look, Eddie if your here to bust my balls over that too then don't bother. I've had enough of everyone's shit, okay?' 'I'm not trying to do that, Rose. I just wanted to tell you, you guys got my support and who cares who says what. If you want to be with him and he wants to be with you, then fuck everyone else. Screw em, Rose, do you.' I take Eddie's words in carefully, a little unsure of what he's just said and watch as he doesn't laugh at me. 'Really?' He smiles and nods at my surprised look. 'Really. I actually think your good for each other, I mean it's kind of weird, but I get it.' I smile at his kindness and remember that this was how Eddie always used to be.

I hold back the news of how Dimitri and I had ended whatever had happen. Well, how Dimitri had ended whatever we were and just let Eddie think that his kind words had made my day. The truth is they actually did kind of make me feel better. 'Thanks Eddie, for saying that and being a good friend.' He nods and smiles as we lean in to hug each other. After our goodbyes and see ya's, I drive to work in a better mood than I was when I drove to school. As I worked I found myself more in my head than anywhere else. Abe's words kept creepily popping up in my head and I kept going over them and questioning whether or not I wanted to put myself out there again. Dimitri was a complicated guy and that was no question, but was he worth taking that risk again? It was obvious he made me happy and that I had some kind of effect on him. I just didn't know what it meant or if he was willing to try again. The one thing I knew I had to prepare myself for was getting answers from him. That's all I really wanted and exactly what I had to do in order for us to even be friends again. The problem was how.

...

His house was darkened by the lack of street lights in the neighborhood. As if it was hiding, but I remembered it exactly. The old raggedy truck his father drove wasn't there, but there was a light on in the window. I thought it was the perfect opportunity to go and see what happens. Now if only I could get out of my car and do what seemed so easy to do in my head. I had just mailed my applications for college and as always, the old man's words seem to take effect as I knew Dimitri lived close by. The night was still, the cold making a deeper effect since it was now the beginning of winter. I had already been sitting in my car since driving up about ten minutes ago. It was just me being nervous and thinking too much. I swallowed the fear and nervousness as I unbuckled my seatbelt and opened my car door. Once I stood out into the night, I clutched my coat tighter around myself and then proceeded to walk across the road into the yard.

Once I was in front of the door, the nervousness and fear seemed to hang around me even more. I closed my eyes and knocked, taking a step back and waiting for what felt like ever for the door to open. A click of the lock and a small second later, Dimitri had opened the door and as soon as our eyes made contact; I couldn't look away. It was odd in that moment because I knew then that I didn't want to give up on him. That whatever I was feeling for him was becoming clearer and clearer. 'Hey...' His eyes widened when he processed it was me at the other end of the door. Then he relaxed and stood in the tiny spot between the door and wall. 'Rose?' Well, it was now or never. 'I-um I didn't see your dads truck outside, so I thought I'd see if you were home.' He swallowed and looked out to the street and then quickly back to me. The silence at that time was heavy. So heavy I almost felt like I couldn't breathe. 'What do you want, Roza?'

I wanted to smile at the sound of that name. How it left his lips so easily and hung in the air. I hadn't heard it in a few days and was surprised at how much I had missed it. 'I just- I just wanted to see how you were... If you were okay, you know...' I couldn't think of anything else to say after that, well, I could. Although I didn't want to push my luck by having him runaway again. So I just let the silence speak for me. He kept his face stoic, but his eyes wondered everywhere except on mine. He almost looked as if he was making sure no one else was around. As he checked everything over again, he stepped aside and opened the door a little more. 'Come inside.' I followed him in and stopped in the middle of the living room as he shut and locked the door. 'You haven't been to school. I was wondering if you were okay.' He stands beside me and watches as I uncomfortably play with the buttons on my coat and avoid his questioning gaze. 'I'm fine. What are you doing here, Rose?' I swallowed the heavy feeling in my throat and take notice of the name change. I should've told him the real reason why I was here and make everything more complicated for us or for me. However, the moment I open my mouth to tell him I missed him, I couldn't get the words out. I wasn't sure if he would go and push me away again. I didn't want to risk that, I just wanted to stay and be with him.

'You shouldn't have come here. Thank you for being concerned, but I told you we weren't-' 'A good idea, I know.' I looked down to my feet a little embarrassed and sad that he wasn't happy to see me. Maybe I was wrong, maybe thinking to just show up and see what happens was a stupid idea, but once I made up my mind. There wasn't any going back and although I was afraid he would say or do something like this, I still wanted to see him. I shook away the disappointment and frustration. I sighed and faced him as he folded his arms across his chest and waited for me to say something. I took this moment to take him in. The way he stood silent and tall, the way the muscles of his forearms flexed as he anticipated what I would say next. The way his eyes watched me with that confused, but slightly eager gaze. I decided I wasn't going to hide from him and I wasn't going to hold back. I'd show him how easy it would be to let yourself out to someone. To tell the truth and not let the worry, shame or fears of what he was holding back keep him from me. 'Look, Dimitri, I know you think you're doing me a favor by keeping me away. That you think it's for the best to do that for whatever reasons you have, but you're not.' As he stood there and what I assumed took my words in, I stepped closer unknowingly. I wanted to be close to him and that pull wasn't letting me fight it.

'It's not better that way and it's not going to make me just forget you, I can't do that. I'm taking a big chance on you whether you want it or not.' On every word I spoke I slightly stepped closer to him. He backed up only once and hit the wall lightly. I stood in front of him and kept our eyes on each other. I wanted to kiss him and tell him all these other things that he didn't need to do to push me away, but mostly I wanted to push him. I wanted to get him to tell me something back, whether it was him telling me to leave or something else entirely. I just wanted him to know what it was like to have someone not give up. 'Dimitri.. Let me help you. Please, just let me-' 'No.' He shook his head and stepped aside walking away from my close proximity. There was an emotion in his eyes I had caught before he moved, but I couldn't tell if it meant he was giving in or not. He took a deep breath or two and continued to pace a little. He shook his head once again as if he was trying to get what just happen out of his head. I tried to step closer to him in comfort, but he stepped away quickly. 'You don't understand!' His voice boomed out of the silent house and I flinched at the sound. His body became rigged; his eyes everywhere else but on me and his breath came out in huffs. He was either about to panic or getting angry, I couldn't tell. 'You don't get it, Rose, no one understands!' 'Well then make me understand. What is so wrong about us? What's wrong with wanting to be with you?' he began pacing a little more now and I wanted so badly to touch him.

I kept my distance though and watched as he struggled with whatever it was he was going through. 'I just want to help you, Dimitri. That's all I want, I just want to-' 'I'm not worth it, Roza!' He suddenly stopped pacing and his eyes stayed on me this time. I spotted the pain and hurt in them as he stood in front of me. His yell still echoing in the room and my head. He said it with so much certainty, he said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world and I still didn't believe it. 'I'll hurt you, Rose. I hurt everyone I care about.' It was a soft whisper lingering in the quiet intense room. I watched in a numb stare as he avoided my eyes and kept his sorrowful gaze on the floor below him. I slowly stepped closer to him and continued when I saw he didn't move back this time. I reached out and clutched his black t-shirt in my small fingers as his arms hung to his sides. The only thing I heard in the room was my footsteps across the squeaky hardwood floor. I tried pulling him to me, just so he would be closer and not feel any kind of loneliness. 'What are you talking about, huh?' He shook his head at my whispered words and didn't move to touch me as I was touching him. 'Just go, Roza. I'm sorry I hurt you and for-' 'You didn't hurt me, you've never hurt me.' He backed away from me and faced me for this first time in a while. His eyes were sad and the frown he was showing had some confusion in it. 'I left you. I pushed you away, made you feel used. All you have done is be there for me and I go and ruin everything.' I once again walk closer to him and by his shirt pull him closer to me. The distance between us makes me ache to pull him even closer. 'You were just trying to protect me, right?' 'It's no excuse, Rose.'

He kept his head down and looked away from me. His hands shot out running through his hair and I took the chance to wrap my arms around him. I just held on to him as he slowly rested his head on my shoulder. We stayed quiet like this for a while, as I let him relax, but kept questioning everything in my head. 'You should just give up, Roza. You won't feel the way you do when you know the truth.' In that moment I knew what this meant. I knew what I was thinking and feeling was only because of my feelings for him. I still felt like I could trust him and I knew I had enjoyed our time together. I liked being there for him and the fact that he was himself with me. So all these things that he's hiding from me and the fact that I felt wouldn't change how I felt about him, only led to one thing. I wouldn't give up. I'd fight just like the old man said to. 'That's not likely. I'm already in love with you. So, I couldn't give up on you if I tried.' He didn't say anything after that, so I just stayed there with him.

...

It was sometime later when I found myself in his room. It was small and freakishly cold, but it reflected him in every way. He had a small shelf full of books, one picture on his dresser and no TV. We were on his bed and I had my head on his chest with one of his arms across my side. His bed sort of took up most of the room, but he was a tall guy. It was quiet as we lay here and went over the revelation I had made. He still hadn't said anything, but with everything going on I was willing to give him the time. His eyes were closed and I watched as the peace washed over his features. I wanted to touch his face and lips, but I didn't want to push anything. So I continued to lay there and soak up the quiet moment we were having. 'Roza?' 'Yeah?' He took a moment to reply and I kept my eyes closed waiting for him to finish. 'Did you- did you mean what you said?' I knew what he was referring to and as much as I wanted to open my eyes, for some reason I kept them closed. 'Yeah.' I heard him swallow deeply and slightly pull me tighter against him. I let him finish and just stayed in his warmth.

'Well, then I have to tell you something. When I was fourteen, I killed my mother.' I flinched at the words and struggled to keep my eyes closed. I didn't want to give him a reason to stop talking or to not trust me. So I let him talk and just listened. 'Whatever you heard or whoever said what they did about that, they don't know anything. It's all just bullshit.' I had known that, the rumors and stories were just people talking. Now I have a chance at the truth and I'm not going to let it get away. 'It was my older sister's birthday and we were having dinner. She was leaving back to Russia the next day to finish school, so my mother wanted a big thing for her. My father came home late and drunk as usual, he and my mother were arguing. At that time we lived in another house, a bigger one with two floors. We -me and my sisters- were already in bed. I was awake since they were closest to my room at the end of the hall. I heard them arguing in the hallway. They were trying to hold their voices down but my father was getting louder and louder. Anyway he was saying some pretty bad things to her in Russian. And as I listened, I just got angrier and angrier. He was calling her names and saying she was good for nothing, telling her she was useless. I just listened and laid there. My mother didn't like for any of us to get involved when my father was like that, but I just kept getting mad.'

He swallowed again and this time my eyes were open when he looked at me. His gaze was heavy and his eyes carried so much in them. 'He kept saying insult after insult and I sat up in bed when I heard her plead for him to stop. She was crying and I was already anticipating leaving my room. When I heard a smack and her body hit the floor; that was it. It was loud, like a lighting strike or maybe it was just because my adrenalin was rushing, I don't know. As soon as I opened the door, I saw my mother on the floor and he was hovering over her still yelling. In that moment all my rage and fury just escaped me and I went for him. We almost fell down the stairs. I heard voices around me, but all I saw was his face and how angry it was making me. I kept hitting him and punching him... I just wanted him to feel all the pain for once.' He took a moment to go through his thoughts and this is where I knew everything was about to change. His eyes stayed on the ceiling of his room and I waited as he closed them and spoke. 'Someone tried to pull me off of him... I pushed them away too determined to not stop. It wasn't until I heard Sonya's scream... the way it sounded, like just pure pain. I turned around and spotted them just standing there. Once I moved my eyes to what they were looking at... I couldn't breathe. It was- everything was silent, numb.'

I tried to blink away the tears that were forming in my eyes. When I looked at him, his eyes were clutched tightly closed, but I knew from his cracking voice he was holding his back as well. 'She was lying at the bottom of the stairs... Not moving. Her legs were- the way her neck was bent and then she was- There was so much blood, Roza. All I could do was stare at her; all I could do was nothing. I just stood there... watched as my sisters cried and tried to wake her up.' The tears fell from both of our eyes. The moment he stopped talking was filled with silence and I didn't know what to say or do. I could feel the guilt pouring out of him as he rubbed his eyes with his fists. The wonder of why he would tell me that -finally- was still in my mind, but I chose to ignore it. The only thing I did do was move to hug him close to me and in return he squeezed me to his long lean body. We lay there, me on top of him and him fighting to gain control of his emotions as he held me tight. 'See, it's why you shouldn't waste your time with me. I don't deserve it, Roza.' I swallowed back a sob and moved my head in between his neck and shoulder. 'I think you do. It was an accident, just an accident, okay.' He didn't say anything or do anything. He just let me lay on top of him and hugged me closer.

…

Some time had passed as we stayed on the bed. I was falling asleep as Dimitri was playing with my hair. Something he did the time he stayed with me after we had that wonderful night together. Something had struck in my mind when I felt myself dosing off. Something other than the surprising news I had just heard. I knew he was blaming himself and protecting himself from all the guilt he was carrying. I have to admit, I did think it was sudden when he told me and why he chose to do it now. It still didn't change how I felt about him and if I could get him to see that it wasn't his fault, then I'm sure he could get through it. A pounding of a door opening made me jump slightly and Dimitri sit up. I turned to face him and seen him watching the door in anticipation. It was like he knew something bad was about to happen and as soon as that thought ended, his bedroom door shot open. 'Where is it, boy?'

Vladimir Belikov stood in the door frame with a sneer on his face as though he saw the most disgusting thing in his entire life. Dimitri stood from the bed with quickness and went to stand in between me an his father. 'Where is what?' His father snorted and moved a step closer in the room, Dimitri followed with a step of his own. 'Don't play with me boy, where is it!' 'I don't know what you're talking about.' Vladimir let a breath of frustration out. I got up to grab my coat and attempted to make an exit, but before I could I caught the evil eerie glare of Dimitri's father. I froze at his gaze and seen Dimitri move to my side as he helped me finish putting my coat on. 'I want to know what you did with it, boy. You find it now!' Dimitri gripped my arm for a second and then dropped and faced his father with anger clear in his eyes. 'I don't know what the fuck you're talking about!' Before either of us could move, Vladimir had Dimitri by the collar of his shirt and slammed him into his dresser. I tried to move closer to separate them but Dimitri's pleading look flashed to me and I stopped. 'Listen, you глупых ебет! That gun wasn't mine; it wasn't to leave this house! Now where is it?' Dimitri just looked to his father and showed no fear. 'It's gone. I got rid of it.'

It became quiet as the two men stared at each other and neither one backed down. Dimitri kept his eyes on his father and all his emotions from earlier had vanished and hid themselves away. His gaze hardened as his father slowly but surely let go of his shirt and dropped his hands. I don't know what had happen between the two of them and their silent argument, but Dimitri had looked to me with a sort of triumph in his eyes. 'You've just ruined me, boy. We're finished.' I didn't know what he meant by that, but Dimitri's eyes had changed in realization. He quickly got out of Vladimir's way and grabbed his jacket and my hand. 'We should get out of here.' With that we had made our way out of the house and outside. 'Where are we going?' I ask as he pretty much drags me to my car and snatches the keys from me. 'I'm taking you home.'

We had pulled up in front if my house a few minutes ago. It was quiet as we sat in the car and pondered over everything that had just happened. I knew as soon as I got out of the car he would leave. I didn't want that, so the next move was to -hopefully- convince him to stay with me. I swallowed and looked at my hands while my fingers played with the seatbelt. 'So that's your dad, huh.' He nods after laughing quietly. 'Yeah. I'm sorry about that by the way. He hasn't been home for a few days and then he suddenly comes back like that. Things have been tense, I guess.' He shrugs and runs his fingers over the steering wheel as I nod in understanding. 'Dimitri, will you stay with me... please?' I finally gain the courage to face him and a second later, I find him staring back. He takes a long minute to think it over. Then slowly leans over to my side and kisses my lips lightly. 'Yeah, I'll stay with you, Roza.'

**So ive been trying to post for the last three days, whats up with that FF? Anyway, this was emotional and the next few chapters will be as well. The next update should be soon-ish.**

**As always muchos gracias on the alerts, favs and reviews. Please feel free to leave some more (;**


	13. Chapter 13

****Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 13:** A Harsh Reality.

The room was silent as I made my way to my bed where a sleepy Dimitri was laying. He looked as good as ever in his briefs and shirtless. I can spot all the dips and cuts of his muscles as he breathed in and out. I crawled in bed and he moved quickly to put his strong arm under my head. Once we were settled, I laid there and went over everything in my head. I could feel Dimitri's eyes on me as I looked to the wall and tried to keep my eyes there. He moved a strand of hair from my face and sighed. 'What's wrong, Roza?' I smirk at the return of that name and the way it rolled off his tongue. 'Nothing much.' He laughs quietly as my smirk grows into a wide smile. 'No, there's something on your mind. What is it?' I shrug and turn from my back to my side to face him. 'I don't mean to damper the mood, but...' I sigh in frustration and hesitance. 'What is it?' When he looks at me, suddenly the courage I needed finds its way to my voice. 'You and your dad, there's a lot of pain there.'

The statement slash question lingered in the air and I wanted to erase that moment from ever happening. I closed my eyes in embarrassment and wanted to slap myself. 'It's hard to explain.' My eyes shot open as he answered and began playing with my hair once again. 'I took her away from him. So I should suffer and be punished for what I did.' I hated that answer as soon as I heard it. I didn't see things the way he did and it made me mad he would tolerate his father's pathetic behavior. 'Why do you let him make you feel guilty? You just let him run your life.' The words had escaped me before I could control them and not seem so frustrated, but it was too late now. 'Because it's true, Roza. It's just how things have to be-' 'No, it's not. It was an accident. You were trying to protect her.' Once again I close my eyes and take a deep breath as I find myself sitting up and glaring at Dimitri. He just sighs and stares at me with a stoic gaze, watching as I become more and more aggravated with his logic. 'When he asked about whatever he was looking for, you didn't even flinch at him. You weren't scared or didn't back down from him and that was good, but I don't see how you would come to school with bloody noses or broken arms. I don't understand that, Dimitri.' He swallowed and sighed while sitting up to lean on the wall where my bed was next to. 'You don't have to understand it, Roza; it's just the way things are. It's how it's always been.' 'But it doesn't have to be like that, Dimitri. Can't you see? Life doesn't have to be about pain and someone hurting you, it could be good. It will be, you just have to give it a chance.' He sighed and looked away from me. 'I can't.. I can't- I don't know how to do the things you want me to do. I don't know how it's not my fault and how I'm not supposed to feel this way. This is all I've ever known, Roza. I did that to my family, I caused all of this. All I wanted was for him to pay for what he was doing to her and then it all went wrong!'

It didn't make sense to me. It was an accident, he didn't intentionally mean to push her, but it happen and now he thinks he deserves this life he's been pointed for so long. 'You're wrong. This isn't how you should feel or what you deserve. You were trying to protect your mother from someone who was hurting her. All you did was try and help, it was an accident.' He looked away and his eyes landed on the floor as I spoke my next words. 'You really think you killed your own mother?' A long silent minute passed us and then all he did was nod. That action made me even more frustrated with him and I wanted to slap him for even believing that for a second. 'I don't believe that.' 'You weren't even there.' His hard firm tone told me I was getting him upset, but I didn't care. 'I didn't have to be. I know you; you're incapable of hurting anyone unless you _have_ to.' This time he did face me and his eyes were full of anger, but they were also full of wonder. 'You don't know that, Roza.' I shake my head and scoot closer to him, grabbing his hand and holding it in my own. 'I do. That's why I don't believe you when you say it's your fault. You said so yourself that you tried to help, but she fell. An accident, Dimitri. That's all it was and you feel guilty because you couldn't save her, because you think you failed. You let your father take advantage, you let him blame you and you believe him. He made you think it was your fault and so you just accepted it, like nothing.' He stayed quiet and said nothing. His eyes however, spoke a million words at once as they watered and he clutched them closed tightly. 'I don't believe for one second that you would _ever_ hurt anyone you love. You're too busy protecting them.' And with that last sentence spoken, Dimitri had cracked and the tears kept falling. I held his shaking body to my own and hugged him as close I could. It was like years and years of guilt that had been held back were now getting to be relieved.

.**D**.

_ 'Mama!' 'Dimka! What did you do, what did you do брат?' The pounding of feet slamming down the stairs rumbles in my ear as Sonya rushes to mother's side. There's tears blurring my eyes and the image of my mother lying at the bottom of the stairs in a crumbled heap causes more to fall. 'Mama! Mama, wake up! Please! Mama, Проснитесь!' Viktoria cries and screams at her lifeless body in pure agony. I want to move, I want my feet to move down the stairs so I can touch my mother. So I can scream at her to wake up and be okay, but my feet don't move. I just watch, I watch in horror as my sisters scream and cry for her. 'Vika, call an ambulance! Go! Get help for her!'_

_Sonya's screams echo in my head and the blur of my eyes deepens. My thoughts all scrambled, my head aches and my body shakes as though I'm not even here at all. It was sort of an out of body experience. I couldn't comprehend if this was really happening, if I was really here or if my mother was really there. The bloods spilled from her head seem to paint the floor quickly with its deep redness. My sisters both in panics, the toddler Sonya had crying in the room for her mother and the fading of noise in my head. It was all so sudden, all so vivid. I didn't know what to do. My fist hurt from hitting my father so much. My head from the rush of emotions flooding through me and my heart. My heart ached the most, it made it hard to breathe and hard to snap back into reality. I hear footsteps behind me, rushing back and forth as a voice hysterically pleads for help. The baby still screaming at the noise and chaos of the house and the people in it. I still can't move, getting air to my lungs seems impossible and my eyes don't move from the lifeless body sprawled out on the floor. Then suddenly my watery eyes clear, the air forces its way through me and my mother's eyes snap open. 'Eго хорошо, Dimka, его хорошо.' I can't hear her voice, but I can read her lips. And then my eyes snap open._

A deep rush of air escapes me and I swallow deeply at my vivid dream. The ceiling above me is white, the curtains slightly letting the sun seep through and the beautiful body of my peace lies next to me. Her hair messy and covers her face, but I've never woken up from a bad dream to something so beautiful before. I slowly and carefully move a strand of her dark smooth hair and it reveals her lips. I smile softly and let her sleep. I look to the window and through the small opening spot the outside. It looked cold, but the sun was out. The winter here in Montana was nothing like the ones in Russia. I remember them as a boy, before moving to the states. I miss that place, my grandmother's house and the way it would smell when someone was cooking. My sisters and nephew and nieces. I missed them, I've missed them dearly, but it was better to stay away. They didn't need me reminding them of what I had done. 'Hey.' A slight sleepy whisper snaps me out of my demeanor and I look back to Rose. She stretches and sits up on the bed next to me. She smiles at me and I smirk back, taking in her beauty and all that comes with it. The way she made me forget, the way she didn't give up and the way she makes me feel. Like anything and everything is possible.

As she gets up and grabs clothes to dress in, I watch in amazement. How this person who I only saw once or twice at school had planted herself in my life. How all the good she brought me seems to make me want to never give her up again, no matter my father and trouble. How when she ties her hair up and stops to smile at me as I watch her, just makes me want to kiss her hard and good. I stand and make my way around the bed to her. She watches with a smirk as I reach my hand out and grab her arm pulling her closer to me, and just as I'm about to lean in. 'Kiz!' We hear and step away from each other quickly. 'Yeah, pop?' We still face each other and keep our eyes locked, but soon the door jumps open and the moment is gone. 'Are you- oh, Dimitri...' Abe stands at her door with a confused look that's quickly turning to amusement. I take a step away from Rose and fold my arms behind my back for some odd reason. 'Um- good morning sir- uh Abe.' I slightly stumble at getting the words out as Abe keeps his eyes back and forth to me and Rose. 'Good morning... Would you like some breakfast?' Abe's eyes change to a look of amusement and before I could answer, Rose interrupts. 'Um, yeah, pop that would be great. Thank you.' He takes a few seconds to turn around and nods before leaving. As Rose is about to speak again, I snap my head to the door where Abe is once again standing. 'Did you two have a good night?' I move my eyes about the room as Rose closes her eyes in embarrassment. 'Pop!' Abe just smiles widely and nods as he continues on down stairs to the kitchen.

Rose shakes her head and sighs at her father's antics still a little embarrassed. 'I'm sorry, he's a little crazy in the mornings.' I smile slightly. 'It's okay, Roza.' She nods at me and steps a little closer as I also do. 'How are you feeling this morning?' She asks with a concerned look on her face. It makes me smile sadly, but it also brings me a feeling I've not felt in a while; relief. 'I feel good, thanks for asking. Good morning.' I push away the seriousness of the moment and change the subject to lighter one. I don't want to damper this mood we have gotten lucky to have, she smiles and steps closer. 'Good morning.' I meet her half way and we slowly lean in to each other, not letting our eyes wonder away as our lips meet lightly at first, but linger after. We break away and keep ourselves close to one another. Rose smiles wide and I watch as she reaches up and runs her small fingers through my messy bed head. We smile at each other and I think nothing can go wrong today, not one single thing. A loud thump and the sound of pots hitting the floor snap us out of our moment and Rose's eyes change quickly to worry. Without words we make our way down stairs and just as I turn the corner into the kitchen with Rose a step behind me, I stop. Rose gasps as I get my mind to react and kneel next to Abe's unconscious body on the kitchen floor.

.**R**.

It was like a blur. A silent, moving picture that I couldn't get focused on. It was kind of like everything was happening so quickly and I didn't know what to focus on. All I know and all I felt was fear. It rushed through my veins and out with every breath I took. All I could see were the paramedics rushing to get my father into the ambulance. Dimitri rushing down the stairs and handing me clothes, pulling and pushing me with him as we walked to the truck and I unconsciously got in. I look out through the open doors of the vehicle and see Dimitri watching me in a concerned look, but keeping his emotions intact. The driver comes in front of him and Dimitri says something to me, but I don't hear it. The paramedic closes the doors and with a loud boom of the locks clicking together everything snaps into motion.

The van comes alive and with it I can hear the loud siren. I can feel the the bumps as we drive at about full speed to the hospital. It feels like everything is just happening and I'm just passing by with it. I could feel myself take deep breaths after deep breaths and then I finally look to my father. The oxygen mask is placed on him and the guy working on him talks to me, but I don't hear him at all. Instead I hear another voice, a familiar deeper one. 'Kızı! Kızı, where are you?' Once I spot my father's hand shooting up in searching for my own, I grab it and lean in to look at him. He smiles barely and then squeezes my hand lightly as if using all his strength. 'I'm sorry about breakfast, kiz.' I swallow down my tears and the large lump forming in my throat and shake my head. 'It's fine, pop.' My voice cracks at the words. He squeezes my hand once again and adjusts the clear plastic mask. 'I thought I had more time..' His voice comes out in a whisper as the medic tells him to relax. My heart drops at his echoing words still sounding in my head. I grip his hand harder and once again swallow the forming tears.

I didn't want to cry in from of him. I didn't want to fall apart yet when I know he needs me so much right now. As we drive through town I just hold his hand and watch as he slips in and out of consciousness. 'What happen?' I keep my eyes to my father as I answer the medic low enough he almost doesn't hear me. 'I don't know, he was on the floor when we went in the kitchen.' The medic nods and checks on Abe and then turns back to me. 'And has this happened before?' A take a moment and to think over the last time this happen and quickly flash back to that unfortunate day. The day I first found my father on the floor of the living room and all emotions hit me again, breaking me away and back to reality. I nod silently as the tears fall suddenly. 'Is there any medical conditions he has?' I close my eyes and try to clear myself of all the feelings flowing through me. The fear especially. 'He has cancer.'

...

I sit in the lobby of the emergency room and stare at the bare white wall in front of me. I answer all the questions the nurse asked and walked along the gurney as they wheeled my father down the halls of the clean smelling hospital. It was just a second ago when they kicked me out of the room so they could work on Abe. I feel like this dark glooming cloud has made a permanent spot over my head and has sucked up all the bright and happiness I was feeling not long ago. This cannot be happening, this isn't right. This was way too soon then we both had thought. Abe's words still going off in my head and making the lump in my throat grow, the want to cry now a need and the sudden loneliness I'm feeling wanting to capture me whole. Any minute now and I'm going to lose it. I'm going let the darkened cloud take me and fall apart while my father fights for a little more time of life. 'Roza...'

I open my blurry eyes and watch as this tall blurred shadow gets closer and closer to me. I swallow the lump and stand barely keeping myself from shaking as Dimitri finally gets close enough and gathers me in his arms. He holds me tight and I lose myself in his embrace. I lose the fight to stay strong and let out all the worry and fear and sadness. It envelopes me and in his warmth I feel is the only way I can breathe. The only reason I haven't yet lost my mind at the worry and fear of losing my father. The only person who has never let me down, the only parent I have and the very reason I have this man holding me together right now. All my life my father has told me to never give up and to let myself out into the world. However, right now, I didn't understand how to be that strong person he taught me to be. It was a little strange, leaning on someone to get myself through something, but I'm glad I do have that. All thanks to my pop and his stubbornness. 'Rosemarie?' I step out of Dimitri's arms and come face to face with Alberta; she smiles sadly and puts her hand on my shoulder. 'He's okay, I gave him something for the pain. You could see him if you want.'

He looks older. His eyes closed and his breathing filling the room of a soft noise. I sit on the chair next to him and hold his hand. Dimitri stands and is leaning against the window, where the curtains have been slightly closed. The beeping of the heart monitor silences the room and I just stare at my pop. We did everything right, he was fine and then in a flash it's all gone. I didn't know if this was it or if this was a close call, but I prayed it would be the second option. We've been sitting for what seemed like forever. Every now and then I would be standing by the window and Dimitri would be watching the monitors. Then I'd sit at the end of the bed, my legs folded under me and I watch my dad takes breath after breath. The sun has been down for I don't know how long and all I keep thinking is that his eyes will open any minute now, but it doesn't happen. 'Rose, can you come with me for a second. We need to go over a few things.'

.**D**.

Roza nods tiredly and gives me a look saying if anything changes to get her. I nod and sit at the chair next to her father's bed. A few minutes go by and it's silence in the room. There's always something, whether trouble or heartache, there's always something cutting off the good moments of life. This was a lot to endure and a lot on Rose especially. She didn't deserve this and I hated that. The way she loves is with all of herself and here it's as if the world will always make her struggle to be loved back. I swallow deeply and run over the never ending thoughts of my mind. They circulate like sharks, always making things so much more risky. It makes me want to fix this for her. It makes me want to do whatever and anything just so she doesn't have to feel any ounce of pain.

I sigh in deep thought as I ponder over everything that has gone on. I go over the words that Roza said last night and ask myself the same question. Did I love her? 'Rosemarie?' His shallow voice echoes in my head and my eyes snap to his pale face. 'Mr. Mazur?' I lean in and grasp his forearm lightly realizing who he was asking for. 'Rose...' I lick my lips in anticipation and shake my head. 'No, no it's me, Dimitri.' He swallows and inhales deeply. I try to make my escape and go find Rose so she can see him, but as soon as I move he pulls me back. 'Dimitri...' I nod and pad his shoulder so he knows to let me go, but he whispers again. 'Dimitri, where's Rose?' 'She's with Alberta, I'll go and get her for you, okay.' He nods and I move to leave again, but he pulls me back and breathes deeply. 'She loves you.' It wasn't a question, but a statement and very true one. I nod at his words and wait as he gains strength to speak again.

'She loves you, my kiz, so much. She didn't even realize it at first.' I nod again and watch as his lips move in a slight smirk. 'You will take care of her, keep her safe and happy? Let her love you so she can finally be able to live her own life.' I take a moment to go over his words and nod at his awaiting eyes. 'She needs you- she needs you to let her in. So you can see how beautiful life can be. No pain... No hurt or suffering, just love. Your good for each other, but not here' I let him take a rest and try to push away my nagging sense to not feel like I would only burden Rose. 'Don't run from her... You're running from the wrong thing, run with her.' It didn't make any sense. What was he saying about running, what did he mean by away from here? 'I- I don't understand, sir.' He nods and licks his dry lips. 'I thought I'd at least get to see her graduate. I really wanted that for her. It doesn't look like that's going to happen.' I swallow the intense words he seems to be spilling and take in his meaning of them. I lightly squeeze his shoulder in understanding. 'I don't want you to worry, Mr. Mazur. I'll keep her safe, Roza will be okay. I promise.' He nods and squeezes my arm in return. 'I know it's why I trust you. Take care of our girl.' His eyes close again as the next dose of medicine takes its effect and he's out.

**Russian words: brother/ wake up/ its okay. Turkish words: daughter.**

**That was emotional. Again. Thanks a heap for the alerts, favs, and reviews. You are some awesome people, seriously!**

**The next chapter will be up as soon as im done with it and Lissa will return, so be prepared to want to punch someone or maybe not. (:**

**Thanks for reading!**


	14. Chapter 14

****Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 14:** Don't Forget to Love before You're Gone.

The days felt like weeks, the nights like they had never ended. I skipped school and missed work, but my boss and teachers understood. Dimitri stayed with me as I watched my father go in and out of consciousness. He brought me food, a change of clothes and let me sleep on his shoulder when I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore. It's been almost two really long weeks since bringing Abe into the hospital and he hasn't gotten any worse, but not any better. Now at this moment he was sleeping. His eyes closed and his breathing calm, but I knew he was in pain and the only thing helping him was the tube pouring morphine into his aching body. I wanted to stay awake and watch him, so Dimitri had decided to catch up on sleep too. We sat on the couch bed thing next to the window of my father's small hospital room. Dimitri's head on my lap while his long legs hung off the end and me with my legs bent sitting sideways. So I could watch Abe and every now and then look out through the window.

It was getting dark outside. The sun just peeking above the horizon and the orange-ish glow was disappearing. I watched as the wind picked up a little and moved the trees. I was glad that Dimitri had stayed and helped me so much. He was truly my strength right now, just as I was his. He was peaceful when he slept. His face unguarded and a light smirk placed on his firm lips. It was quiet in the room as I watched both the men in my life sleep away their pain. My father especially, it was kind of overwhelming how he was so calm coming in here. How he spoke with such ease and understanding. It was like he was ready to go if he had to. However, I wasn't ready for that. Not yet. It's been kind of blah since being here and I have a feeling -a strong painful feeling- Abe won't ever come out. As much as I didn't want to face that or have it happen, I knew it was inevitable and I should be stronger than this. But he's my dad and I wasn't ready to let him go.

**.D.**

I heard them before I felt them. The tears and sobs coming out in muffled breaths. Roza was crying again and didn't want to worry anyone or appear weak in front of Abe. I open my eyes slowly, silently watching as she covers her mouth and clutched her eyes closed. The tears fall down her red cheeks and land in my hair or on her other hand that was previously running through my hair. I sit up slowly, not wanting to make her feel anymore sadness and wrap her in my arms. Her breath on my neck, her hands gripping my shirt and her cries threatening to take over. I hold her tight to my body and just dwell in the silence. I let her cry and release her pain and worry. I stay silent as she fights with herself to keep control and not breakdown. For now at least and then slowly quietly and a little more calmly; she starts to fall asleep.

As I enter the room with breakfast -hot chocolate and a donut- Rose is sitting up and rubbing her tired eyes. 'Thank you.' She says as I hand her the cup and sit next to her on the small uncomfortable couch. She leans her head on my shoulder after taking a few sips from the foam cup and sighs. 'I didn't mean to fall asleep or soak your shirt in tears.' I smile sadly and wrap my arm over her shoulder, pulling her closer to me. 'It's okay, Roza. You needed to get that out and you needed the sleep.' I kiss her temple and she leans into me. I've never felt so whole like this before. As if I was actually needed by someone else and not there for their own benefit. It felt good to be needed, wanted and to take care of Rose the way she took care of me. 'Speaking of sleep, you should get some rest yourself.' I shake my head and shrug at her frown. It deepens as though she's just realized something and she backs out of my hold. 'Dimitri, when was the last time you showered?' I look away and think to myself, then back to her and shrug. 'Ew. You should go and clean up. The nurses are going to kick you out for smelling up the place.' I smile and shake my head not wanting to leave her alone, but I get up anyway. 'Okay, I guess I should then. You want me to bring you something? Food or clothes?' She nods as I lean down to kiss her -something I'm still getting used to- and our lips linger in the moment. 'Just some more clothes and can you bring some for my dad. I want him to be comfortable, maybe it will help having something from home here.' I nod at her request and begin walking to the door.

After a look back to Rose, I see the fear and worry in her eyes. I want to make sure she knows I'll be here; I'll be here no matter what for her. 'I'll be right back, Roza.' I say quietly as she smiles sadly at me and nods with a look of pain I want to wash away. Once I pass the front desk and see the open doors ahead, I spot a familiar figure walking in from the parking lot. I sigh at the way her blonde hair moves with the wind and the way her loud shoes clack on the concrete. I know in my gut this is only going to make things harder for Rose, so I attempt to ignore her as we pass each other in the doorway of the hospital. It's not until she clears her throat that I notice her heels not making noise and I turn to face her in annoyance. She looks at me, her eyes moving up and down in a glare of disgust and then she steps closer to me. I don't really care what she has to say, I know girls like her, she isn't like Rose. We stare at each other for a few odd and quiet seconds and I wonder what her problem is exactly. She sighs in that prissy snob way and puts a hand to her hip. 'Do you need something?'

I ask with obvious annoyance then she rolls her green eyes. 'As a matter of fact I do.' I raise an eyebrow and wait as she continues to glare and watch me in disgust. 'Why are you here?' I take in her threatening tone and think over what to say. 'What's it to you?' Lissa rolls her eyes and sighs in annoyance, taking a few steps closer to me and then stopping as if just to glare at me closer. 'Rose doesn't need you here bothering her; go look for someone else to drag down.' I snort in annoyance and shake my head while turning to walk away. I could feel her eyes on the back of my head, burning me with whatever hate and misunderstanding she was carrying toward me. I hear her sigh as I take a few more steps away from her and then come to a stop as soon as she speaks. 'You're wasting her time... And yours. It's not like you care though, right? Your just here for whatever reasons you are-' 'Rose wants me here!' I turned facing her with an angry glare and silence her rambling. As she looks at me in slight surprise, I step closer and continue. 'She needs me, she needs everyone right now. The least you could do is stop harassing me and be there for Rose, since you seem so concerned.' She flinches at my last word as I say it in a firm tone.

As we stand there and wait for each other to speak or do something, her expression becomes blank and her eyes stay on mine. 'She deserves better you and I both know that. You're not worth her time or anyone else's. She puts up with a lot and we both know that her father isn't going to last very long.' As I open my mouth to object to her useless words, she puts a finger in my face and continues speaking in a harsh tone. 'And before you say whatever it is that you're going to say, you need to know this; Rose is family. _My_ family and I protect my family from whatever it is that doesn't belong.' A short silence occurs between us and I keep my mouth shut waiting for her to finally finish. 'That's you... _You_ don't belong. You're just going to hurt her and I'll be left to pick up the pieces. That isn't going to happen.' I take a moment to roam over what she has just said and find myself slightly agreeing with her, but something else she's said sticks and it bugs me. 'That's all you're concerned with... How it affects _you_?' She opens her mouth to say something, but I step a little closer to her before she can. 'Rose, is a lot stronger than you think, she knows what's going to happen. She just needs someone to show her she isn't alone, of course you would know all about that since you're so close. Some family you are.' As I turn and begin walking into the parking lot, I know I've left her standing there stumped. Although, she of course has to have the last word and I just keep walking as she yells out. 'You stay away from Rose. I mean it, leave her alone!' I let her think she's won and carry the look on her face as I walk away. I wasn't going to leave Rose when she needed me most, I had already made that choice when she told me she loved me, but Lissa's comments did make a lot of sense.

**.R.**

'Rosemarie?' I heard his voice croak as I was almost drifting off again. I snap my eyes to see my dad's brown ones wide open and searching. I quickly take the few steps to his bedside and grab his weak hand, squeezing lightly. 'I'm here, Pop.' He sighs tiredly and smiles small, giving me some sense of him being okay. I resist the urge to cry, I fight the tears that want to spill down my face as he slowly and weakly squeezes right back. I swallow the large lump in my throat and focus on his face as he gathers himself to speak. 'How are you, kiz?' I smile sadly and shrug at his question. He shakes his head and squeezes my hand once again. 'Come on, kiz, humor your old man.' I swallow heavy once again and blink away the sadness. 'I'm okay, pop, don't worry about me.' He smiled once again, weak and tiredly. 'Always the strong one. Where's you're not so boyfriend?' I smile and shake my head in attempted to not let out the loud booming laugh his easy words created. 'Oh, I got rid of him, Abe. You don't have to worry about him anymore. Knock Knock!' My head snaps up at her voice and words. Lissa walks into the room and wears a big smile while talking to my dad. 'Hey, Mr. Mazur, how you feeling today?' My father just smiles at her and continues conversation as I wonder what the hell Lissa was doing here. 'Vasilisa, how are you? It's been so long since you've visited me. I thought you forgot about Rose's old annoying father.' She laughs and throws a peek at me as I'm still in slight shock she had showed up. 'You're hardly old, just wiser.'

They laugh together like they would have any other time. A time before she made it clear about my feelings toward a certain boy who has been here with me since everything that happen. It angered me beyond anything that she thought she could just come here and pretend everything was okay. How could she when we haven't talked in almost two weeks. 'So, kiz hasn't mentioned where you've been. Too busy to have dinner with us anymore, Lissa?' Lissa smiles and shoots me another look. One I wasn't sure of, but I had decided to not bring up our fight in front of Abe. Especially right now, since he had no clue I had fallen out with Lissa and I didn't want to worry him over useless drama. They keep talking like nothing was wrong, as if the huge elephant in the room wasn't bringing tension and awkward silences between us. I had only answered when questions were directly toward me or pretended to be interested in Lissa's rambling about her mother and whatever else she talked about.

Her other words still stuck in my head. The hurtful and angering things she said as we sat with all our friends at lunch and she unloaded all her dislike for Dimitri. Dimitri, I suddenly wondered if they had crossed paths as he was leaving and she had come. They had to have run into each other; Lissa had showed up not too long after he had left. I quickly look to her and she finds my eyes, but looks away as I'm sure she's noticed my questioning eyes. After a while of talking with Abe, the nurse comes in to give him more medicine and tells Lissa it's time to go. Dimitri hadn't come back yet and I was slightly glad. They say their goodbyes and Lissa gives Abe a slight hug before wishing him to get better and I stand and wait for her at the door. As we walk a small ways into the hallway, I finally decide to speak and release all the emotions I've been holding back. 'Why did you come here?' She suddenly stops and looks at me in confusion, as if she didn't know what I was talking about. 'Who told you, Lissa?' She sighs in understanding and looks to the floor and her shoes. 'You haven't been to school or work, Mase said something happen. I ran into Eddie and he told me your dad was here.' I really wish people wouldn't talk so much in this town. I also really wish she wouldn't look at me with that helpless look that says _at least she did show up and come see my dad_. I didn't want to give her any pity or let her think I was giving off some kind of hope to fix things between us. I wasn't sure where I stood with her at this particular moment. 'I meant what I said earlier...' I give her a look of confusion and she finally meets my eyes without looking away. 'I told him to leave you alone. I ran into him when I was walking in.'

Anger and a little annoyance had sparked suddenly in my chest. 'Why? If I didn't want him here he wouldn't have been here.' She rolls her eyes and sighs in annoyance at me. 'Rose, you don't need him dragging you down. Right now you need to be there for your dad and him distracting you-' 'He isn't distracting me.' 'Then what is the point of him being here?' 'He wants to be here, Liss. He wants to be here for me like I am for him.' 'How do you know he's not trying to use you? Rose, he's a waste of time, he isn't worth it. I understand you don't want to be alone, but lowering yourself to him-' 'Stop! Just stop it!' She stops talking and the silence lingering in the hall ends our mild argument. I was tired of hearing her same excuses, tired of hearing how he wasn't good enough and tired of hearing her. 'He's been here this whole time. He hasn't left, I had to tell him to go and change and shower. Lissa, he isn't like what everyone else says he is. There's more to him than you think, just give him a chance.' I explain tiredly.

Lissa doesn't move or say anything. She just watches as my eyes tear up and my voice cracks as I continue to explain myself. 'You have to understand something, Liss. My dad isn't going to be here forever and I know that, but I need someone too. You have Christian and your mom, I don't. All I have is Abe and he's fighting for his life, but once he's gone...' Her eyes became soft and she watches me in a different way. As if something clicked and finally made sense to her. I was crying, the tears leaking from my eyes as I said the one thing that I was truly afraid of admitting. 'I just don't want to be alone.' She opened her mouth a few times and shut it without saying anything. Then suddenly she was hugging me and I found myself hugging her right back. 'You're not alone, Rose. You've got me.' I sniffled and tried to find my voice as her words added to the emotions floating around inside me. 'What if that isn't enough? Why can't I have him too?'

After a few more silent minutes of hugging and crying, Lissa and I make our way to the front of the hospital. 'I'm sorry for everything, Rose. Everything I said and the whole thing at school.' I nod and stand at the entrance as she fishes for her keys from her purse. I take a deep breath and release it, like I was letting all the fear and sadness out. 'Rose?' I snap my eyes to Lissa as she stops a few feet from the door. 'Yeah?' 'I um- I said something to Dimitri earlier.' I wait for her to continue and wonder if I'll just get mad all over again. 'I didn't mean it. I just thought he was only going to hurt you and I know you really care about him. I'm sorry.' I nod and smile sadly at her and she returns the gesture. 'It's okay. He won't hurt me, he just wants to protect me and be there. I think it's how he wants to redeem himself...' I didn't mean for her to hear that last part, but it had just kind of made sense to me why Dimitri was so driven to stay with me. 'Redeem himself from what?' I shrug an I don't know to Lissa, she doesn't question it any further and just let's it go as she begins walking out to her car and I turn back toward my dad.

...

After another hour or so, Dimitri had come back showered and changed. As I was in the bathroom helping the old man change I noticed how painful and tiring it was for him to do such a simple task. 'You okay, pop?' He nods and slowly puts his arm in the sleeve of the old shirt Dimitri brought back. 'Pop, if it hurts too much to dress than you don't have to.' 'Don't coddle me, little girl. I'm sick not handicapped.' I roll my eyes at him and help to button up the shirt. 'What did Vasilisa say?' 'About what, pop?' He sighs and I help him to stand so we could make our way back into the room.

As I step ahead to open the door, he grabs my arm and pulls me back to him. 'Rosemarie, it's not good to fight with the people you love at a time like this.' 'We weren't fighting, pop.' He gives me a look saying yeah right and waits as I sigh and explain. 'Okay, we're not fighting anymore. I don't think. It wasn't a big deal old man. Just some overprotectiveness and misunderstanding on her part.' He nods and releases my arm, wrapping his own over my shoulder as we make our way back into his room. 'Good. I'm not going to have you be angry with the people I'm leaving you with.' I don't give his statement any attention, but in the back of my mind I feel sad again. His words stuck with me just like all the ones he's said before about him "leaving". It angered me that he was so okay with it. I knew that this was the way he was though and that I had to understand that it was his time. No matter how much realizing that hurt.

'What's this?' Dimitri and I were seated on the little couch again and I was going through the bag of clothes he brought me back. 'I don't know, I found it on the porch when I got to your house.' The large white envelope was blank on the side facing me, but as I turned it over I quickly noticed the address it was from. 'It's from Berkeley...' One of the schools I applied to, the very one me and my father hoped for. I look at the envelope and touch the name and logo. This was it, something else I really wanted. 'Well, open it little girl, I don't have much time.' Dimitri and I both snap our head to the direction of my father as he was now wide awake apparently. I roll my eyes at his statement and turn the envelope over to open it. 'I thought you were asleep, old man?' He smiles slightly and shrugs. I take a breath before opening it and look to my father as I begin tearing the paper. Those few seconds it took me to open the letter and then unfold the paper seemed long, but before I knew it I was reading. The silence that overtook the room as I read to myself seemed to blur together as I slowly went over the words in my head. 'Well?' My father's anxious voice sounded as I looked up to meet his eager eyes. 'I got in.' At that moment you wouldn't have ever guessed that he was sick or in pain. The most wide and brightest smile had hit his face and all I could see in his eyes was how proud he was of me. I smiled right back at him and took the few steps to go and hug him. He hugged me tight and didn't seem like he wanted to let go. So I just held him and let him take it in.

A few moments later he had let me go and rests his head against the head board. 'I'm so proud of you, kiz. You did good, all that hard work paid off, huh?' I nodded and looked back to the paper in a sort of disbelief. Abe lightly grabbed my arm and gently squeezed it as he began to talk in a low tone. I could tell the medicine was taking effect. 'I'm so happy for you, kiz. See I told you it would all work out. I knew it.' I smiled and noticed the slight tears that were forming in my eyes as I watched him. 'I'm going to get something to eat, Roza.' I turned to Dimitri as he stood up and nodded towards my dad, letting me know he was giving us a moment. I nodded in understanding and watched as he walked out. I sigh taking all that's happen in and keep looking at the paper in my hands. 'Is he going with you?' I look to my father as he sleepily talks. I shrug and lean against the bed once again taking my father's hand. 'You should take him with you, Kiz. There's nothing for either of you here.' I sigh and squeeze our hands together slightly.

'It's not really up to me, pop, and besides we haven't even graduated yet.' Abe sighs in annoyance and tugs on my hand lightly, as if demanding that I listen to him. 'You're going, Kiz. You take him with you or neither of you will ever find peace here.' He was right, well, kind of. Dimitri was trapped here from whatever was holding him back from himself. His father for sure, but me. Well, I had an opportunity to go and do something with my life. A chance at college and to live somewhere where I could start over and live my own life. However, for Dimitri it was a whole other thing. A chance to get out while he still could, maybe even get rid of all the guilt that consumed him and I wanted that for him more than anything. When I looked back to Abe he was already asleep, so I quietly leave his side and go change.

...

'So I guess your bad spaghetti skills got you in, huh?' I smile and look up to him. Abe had long ago fallen asleep and it was just Dimitri and I lying awake on the small couch. 'I guess so.' He smiled sadly at me and moved a piece of hair away from my eyes. 'I think that's great, Roza, you deserve it.' I smile again, but Abe's earlier talk comes up in my head and I try not to dwell on it. I didn't want to leave Dimitri when the time came and I kind of had a feeling he would say something to try and convince me to. 'California is a big place.' He smirks and I know a sarcastic remark is coming. 'Yeah, almost as big as a whole state.' I roll my eyes and shake my head at him as he laughs softly. I like the sound of it as I could fell his low rumbling through my head on his chest.

'I won't know anyone there and ill pretty much be by myself.' Dimitri kept his face blank and just continued to play with my hair. I knew he had an idea at what I was getting at, but I didn't know how to come right out and ask him. So I used the old man as help. 'Abe said something earlier when you were gone.' Dimitri took a deep breath and finally caught my eyes. I took the look to keep on talking. 'He said that it would be like a chance to start my own life. To start over I guess, you know?' He nodded slowly and dropped the strand of hair he had between his fingers. He was silent for a moment, looking as if he had something to say and to me that moment was taking forever. So I hesitantly took the lead and sucked it up to ask him. 'That would be good for me, you know... And you. You could get away from here, all this shit and your dad.' He just looked at me showing nothing in his eyes as I waited for something from him. 'I don't know, Roza, that's some time from now. You should just focus on helping your father get better.' I nod still looking at him and he meets my eyes. I see something in them, something that looked like fear, but I let it go as he leaned in and kissed my forehead. I just hoped he would think about it

**So ff was being lame and not letting me update, but here it is now. There is only one chapter left of this story and then its finished. Done. Over. You get the point, but no worries ive got another story brewing up and im actually really excited about this one. **

**Anyway, just want to thank everyone for the alerts, favs and reviews. They are awesome and if you feel the need to leave anymore please do so. And as always thanks for reading (:**


	15. Chapter 15

Richelle Mead owns these characters.

**Chapter 15:** In A Different View.

It was early when he awoke. The sun was bright through the window and his cramped back was in dire need of a stretch. He sighed at the beauty next to him, sleeping in a peaceful heap under his strong arm. He breathed in deeply and the scent of her hair enveloped his nose. He was the only one awake so far and something urged him to be prepared for when she would be. His feelings for her were strong and intense, he wanted her to able to relax and take in the joy of still having her father around. At least one of them had a good father and he wanted to be a part of her life. Dimitri slowly but surely stood up from behind Rose's small sleepy frame and stretched. He could hear the light footprints of the nurses and other guests walking about in the hallway. So he decided to put some shoes on, wash up in the bathroom and then head out to the cafeteria for some donuts and hot chocolate.

As he waited in line to pay for his two hot chocolates and two donuts for Rose. He kept thinking about what she had mentioned and how it wasn't actually a bad idea to leave this place. To go on and make a new life, and to do it with Rose. Someone he knew would always be there for him, no matter what. He thought of how he didn't want her to be alone or to suffer and feel like she didn't have anyone. She had him and that much he knew. He also thought about her father, the man dying right before their eyes and how he was so driven to make sure his daughter was loved. He had made a promise to Abe that he wouldn't leave her and she would be safe. Now if only he could keep his word and make sure the girl he felt so strong for would be okay.

The line seems to never move, the cafeteria being busier than usual this morning. He was thankful though, it gave him more time to think and figure out if he should take this major risk. One that could and will most likely leave him hurt and hurting the one person he promised to take care of. Life was so complicated it felt like. He couldn't get a break, hurt Rose or attempt a chance to get away from the man who made him suffer so much. It would make life a lot easier, he'd get to be with someone who actually wants him around and makes him happy. It was all so complicated, like life had been up to this point. It seemed he would have a real chance to redeem himself and he'd get to be with Rose. Something he thought would never happen. Loud footsteps sounded in the hallway as he paid for his things. A few nurses running by, when he looked up, most likely heading to a patient.

As he walked by everyone else in line, it felt like he was trapped in some sort of slow motion. It dragged on forever it seemed. He walked down the hall holding the two warm cups and two donuts he knew Rose would love. Another nurse quickly ran by and almost bumped into him. He moved to the side and then as the turn came into view; his stomach seemed to knot itself in a deep sinking twist. He turned the corner where he knew he would see the doorway into the room Rose was supposed to be waiting for him in. She was supposed to be sleeping still, tucked under his hooded blue sweater and that peaceful look on her face. The room was to be silent as Rose and her father slept and didn't have to worry about anything until they opened their eyes. However, that wasn't what was ahead of him as he turned the corner. No, it was heartbreaking, that knot twisting tighter and making him almost lose his calm breathing.

What he came into view of was nothing he was ready for, a least not yet. The nurse who just passed him walking back out and running down the hall in a rush, and then Rose. She was standing outside the door of the room many people were in and out of. A doctor followed that same nurse back in the room and then his eyes focused back on to Rose. Rose and the look of pain, sadness and hurt that had graced her face. The tears that fell as she ran her hand through her hair in tired but troubled worry. Suddenly the cups fell to the ground, the donuts following as well and his feet moved quicker than he processed. Rose had turned to face him, hearing his quick footsteps and finally, _finally_ letting it all out. He wrapped her in his big strong arms and held her as close as he could to his body. He had to stay with her, had to let her know he would never let her even _think_ she was alone. How could he, how could he even think to not want be with her? Life was too short, he knew that now, it had never been more clear. The way she smiled when he made a joke, the way she kissed him when they were together and the way she let him be himself while being around her. Here and now is where he finally knew that he couldn't walk away from her or let her walk away from him. It was clearer now than ever, he loved her and love was worth running the risk to leave behind all the pain and suffering. To leave behind the man who had run his life up until now. He knew a life with Rose was worth anything he would endure.

'It's okay, Roza, I'm right here.' It felt like the heaviest of chains had weighed down on her. Her heart ached and chest felt tight like she couldn't breathe. The world seemed to stop spinning and the moment she saw those comforting warm brown eyes all her guard had crumbled. She cried and cried as he whispered soft words of Russian into her ear and hair. He felt like the piece of her she's been missing for so long, but now there was another part of her heart that was leaving her. 'I tried- I tried to wake him up, but he- he wouldn't move. He wouldn't open his eyes...' She couldn't even get her words out or make any of sense of the sadness surrounding her mind. All she knew was that as soon as that life line had gone flat, her whole world had gone quiet. Like a sound that had been playing her whole life had finally ended and she wasn't quite expecting it to happen so suddenly.

'He wouldn't wake up. He wouldn't open his eyes...' Her whispers of pain ended as she cried even harder into that warm strong chest. 'It's okay. It's okay, my Любовь, we'll be okay.' All he could do was comfort and hug her and tell her he would be there. He noticed the doctors and nurses move rapidly around the room and around them. He noticed how Rose gasped the same time the doctor walked out of the room with that solemn sad look on her face. This was it, this was what Abe was talking about; the end. The time to prove to everyone and himself that he was capable of fulfilling a promise. A promise he would never ever break as long as she would have him. 'We'll be okay, I'm right here, Roza. я тебя люблю.' He finally released all that love he carried for her and told her. The world seems to fade as he held her and she cried. Time seem to waste slowly as they stood there in the hallway, Alberta explaining Abe couldn't hold on any longer and Rose cried all of her pain away. That was it, her father was gone and now they both had a chance to live.

**.R.**

The letter felt as light as the paper it was printed on. I've open and closed it so many times already. It made me think of my dad and what he wanted me to do with it. _You're going, kiz_. I could still here his voice telling me to go and be happy. The days after he died were the blankest and blurred days I have ever been through. Dimitri was there the whole time, Lissa came by and sat with me, and Alberta had kept calling to check up on me. I slept and didn't eat. I lied awake and went through every moment I had with my dad. The good and the bad, the highs and the lows and everything in between. I missed him, I missed him a lot.

'Hey, pop.' There was a light wind moving the silence as I stood in front of his headstone. I moved my eyes along the land where other people's fathers and family members lay to rest. I was finally able to get up and get out of the house. I had convinced Dimitri this was something I had to do by myself and so he was waiting for me at home. He pretty much hadn't left since coming back and I was glad. He was there letting me know that I wasn't alone. 'I graduated already, two days ago. Liss, helped me find a dress at the last minute and Dimitri even wore a tie.' I laugh lowly and sigh at the memory of walking across the stage and not finding my father when I looked for him in the seats. Then looking to the row of chairs where I had been sitting and seeing Dimitri's wide smile, warm brown eyes that filled me up with joy. 'We went to Lissa's dinner afterward. It was a little weird because, you know the whole Dimitri thing. I think Liss and I are working over our differences better than we were.'

The memory of the look on most people's faces as I walked hand in hand with Dimitri into Lissa's house was one I would never forget. Everyone seemed to be aware of the elephant in the room, but me and Dimitri didn't pay any attention and kept talking with Eddie like nothing was wrong. I didn't care what they thought of him or of our relationship. It didn't matter anymore, not that we leaving anyway, so they could think what they wanted. 'He's coming with me, all the way to California. We leave in the morning. Thanks by the way.' I kind of had a hard time deciding when to leave; I didn't want to leave my dad just yet. But once Dimitri told me he wanted to go, my joy had sky rocketed and I couldn't contain myself. We had agreed a few days after graduation was the perfect time.

A sudden twist of sadness had hit me and I knew I would miss Abe even more, but I was sure that this is what he wanted for me. I knew that this was the beginning of something more and a new life. A life I would get to make with a guy my father knew would never let me down. Somehow it seemed my father did in fact have a plan for me and knew from the start, that I would be okay. So I should miss him and think of him, but move on. Live for myself and Dimitri who I loved very much. A smile worked itself on my face as I remember what Dimitri told me he had promised my dad. He told me a couple days after the funeral. It was also the night he told me he was going with me to California. The first of many good moments I plan to make with Dimitri. And also the start to help him heal and forgive himself, which was something I knew, would work as long as we did it together. 'I think we'll be okay, Pop. I'll come back to visit, okay, I promise. I love you, old man.' With that, a deep content sigh leaves my body and I turn toward my car and leave this life behind for a new one.

**.D.**

'I'll wait for you.' I sigh as we pull up to my house and I spot his old raggedy truck in the drive way. 'It's okay, this will probably take a while. You should go and finish packing.' The look on her face tells me she didn't want to leave and would fight me to no end in order to stay. 'I can wait, you're just going to get your stuff and then we're gone, right?' Another sigh and I don't want her to think I don't want her to stay. I just think this would be better if I did it myself. This was risking a lot and I didn't know what would happen. I didn't want Rose anywhere near here or my father. 'Roza, just go ahead and go home. You still have a lot to do; I'll be there as soon as I'm done.'

Her eyes flickered to my house and then back to me. There was determination clearly in them and I knew this would be a lot harder than I anticipated. 'No, it's fine. I'll wait, I can wait. It's okay-' 'Roza, please... just go home. I'll be right there, okay?' 'No.' A shake of her head as she said this and my nerves became even more unsettling. 'No? What are you saying, go ahead and go. I'll be right there-' Her eyes became wide with worry and glossed as she fought to keep her emotions intact. 'No, Dimitri. I'm staying right here, I'm waiting for you. I'll wait.' I sigh again and unbuckle my seat belt, leaning across the seats to cup her beautiful face. 'Roza-' 'Don't, okay! Don't do that now; you said you wouldn't push me away anymore. I'm waiting!' I let go of her and watch as the emotions flash in her eyes quickly, before I calmly speak again. 'I'm not pushing you away, okay. Just go. I'll be fine.' She shakes her head again in frustration and a little anger. Her voice suddenly higher and her feelings coming through in it. 'Stop lying. I'm not buying it, Dimitri, and I'm not leaving you here. I'll wait!'

'Rose, go! Okay! Please, just go.' 'No! What if something happens-' My frustration and nerves come out suddenly and my hands once again cup her face. Our eyes meet and my voice is slightly higher surprising us both. 'Rose, go home before you piss me off.' 'Then be pissed off. I'm not leaving you!' Our yells play out in the car and the quiet that follows make me see her more clearly. Her eyes glaze in tears and I swallow while closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. 'Roza, please just go. I'll be right there. Please...' She swallows back tears and leans into my touch, making me almost change my mind. 'I don't want to leave you...' I smile sadly and my eyes soften with her concern. 'It's the only way I can protect you, Roza. Please, just go home, I'll be right there as soon I'm finished. Okay?' She searches my eyes as she takes in my plead and with a slight nod speaks softly. 'You promise?' I nod and kiss her lips lightly. 'Not good enough, say it. Promise me.' I smile widely at her and we kiss again, our lips linger as I whisper assuring her I'll be okay. 'I promise, Roza. I promise I'll come right back, okay?' She nods and her arms reach around me as we hug each other tightly. 'You better come home, Dimitri. I'm serious.' I laugh lightly as I open the car door and take another look at my future. How beautiful she is even with her hair up in a sloppy ponytail, her eyes red with worry and my sweater around her body. 'I love you, Roza.' She smiles at me with love in her eyes and I turn to walk into what was once my home. Now, I'm not sure what I'll be walking into.

**...**

My room still looks the same, barely any furniture and the cold still present. It felt different though, it felt like so long ago, like a boy who suffered and hid had lived here. Where now, I was a new man and I had a new life to start living. But the fear still lived inside, it still made me think about what I was doing and where I was going. Then I remember last night and how Rose looked so happy as she talked about the beach and how second chances only come once in a while. Thinking about that made me begin to pack more quickly. I couldn't wait to get the hell out of here now and no matter if I had to fight my way out of the door; I was leaving in the morning with Rose. 'You finally remembered where you live, boy?'

I stop for a moment, but then quickly finish folding the shirt in my hands. His voice was slightly slurred and the reek of vodka surrounded him as he stepped closer to the bed I was using to pack my things. 'Are you going somewhere, сын?' Son? I haven't heard that word since my mother was still alive. 'Yeah.' I didn't want to give him any information about who or where I'm going. I couldn't if I wanted to escape from him. 'I'm going to stay with Mikhail for a couple of days.' He snorts at me and I knew he wouldn't buy that. I just kept packing though and knew at any moment something would happen, something bad. 'What did that girl finally get tired of your worthless self? Hmm? Did she finally realize what a piece of useless shit you are, boy?' His words had meant to get a rise out of me, but I wouldn't give into his cruelty. I swallow the rising anger floating to the surface and continue packing and moving about my room as if he's not even here.

'You think you're better than me now, boy? You think because some stupid girl let you fuck her that you're better than me! Huh!' He walks closer to me, literally at my side as I lean over the bed and try to ignore him. _Just keep packing; I tell myself, it's not worth it._ Let him shout and threaten me all he wants, I have to make it back to Rose. 'I'm talking to you, boy!' I keep ignoring him, noticing him dropping the bottle soundlessly on the bed. Then before I can even think, his hands grip my shirt and he pushes me to the wall making the impact with a loud thump. My head bounces off the wall and he's in my face, sneering and screaming at me. 'You want to leave! Huh? You think you can leave me! Your worthless, Dimka, your nothing!' My patience finally wears out and my hands rise to grip his neck as tight as I can. I push against his weight and slam his back into the opposite wall. 'I'm leaving! I'm not coming back, I'm never coming back!'

I scream at the top of my lungs and watch as his eyes become more and more angry. My voice slightly squeaked as I finally let out the words I've wanted to release since forever. 'I'm gone for good. No more making me suffer, no more hurting me, no more! I'm gone, out of your life and you're out of mine!' He laughs eerily and we fight, struggling and pushing against each other trying to overpower the other. Then suddenly the front door slams against the wall and we both look over to it. A line of men entering our house, my father releases me and curses in Russian. Ivan Zeklos and his men enter the house and begin smashing things, making a mess as they search for something. 'Find the goddam gun and bring me Belikov!' Ivan shouts as three huge men enter my room and struggle with my father.

They drag him to the front room and another two fight to drag me along too. 'Well, well, well, two Belikov's for the price of one. This should be pleasant.' The men holding my father kick and punch him sending him to his knees as Ivan walks closer to us. I swallow in the fear of not knowing what could happen and think about how I'm going to get back to Rose now. If I even get the chance to get back to her. 'You must be Dimitri, the one who broke my boy's nose. Now your here, lucky you.' He smiles at me and stops just in front of my father and looks to him in disgust. 'What did I say, Vlad? We had a deal and now we have shit. Where is it?' My father stays silent and moans at the sudden blow to his stomach from Ivan punching him. 'Where is it, Belikov, time is wasting!'

Another punch to his stomach and my father begins weeping. 'I don't know! I don't know, it's gone!' Ivan shakes his head and swings the cane he was carrying across my father's face. 'Well, then, I guess that's that. I gave you chance after chance, Vladimir, and you blew them all. One after another, first the money and then I tell you to hide the gun. Now, look, your back to square one. It's a shame, now you_ and_ your boy have to pay.' Once again the cane makes contact with my father's face, but I'm quickly distracted when a fist comes flying into my own. Two men begin punching me, taking turns and three are now on my father. Ivan walks around the living room as calmly as possible and acts as though nothing is wrong in the world. He lights a cigarette and begins fiddling with things on the shelves as if curious about them.

I'm on the floor as the men stop for a breather and then proceed to drag me into the kitchen by my legs. 'Stop! I'll tell you...' I can barely hear my father's pleads to stop and wait. 'Hold on.' Ivan's voice sounds and the men stop dragging me in the middle of the floor. 'Please. Please, let him go. Let the boy go, he's done nothing. He didn't know, please!' It was strange to hear my father beg and even more strange to hear him beg for me. 'Please, let the boy go. He doesn't know anything; just let him go, please!' He sounds tired and in pain. I breathe in ragged gasps as Ivan looks over to my father with a curious expression and then to me. 'Please... Let him go...' Ivan watches for a long lingering minute. He takes a deep breath and puts his hand to his hip with a thinking expression. Then in a flash of surprise, a moment I didn't think was real or maybe I was dreaming; he nods to the men holding me.

Once their hands release me, I watch in shock and confusion. Ivan makes eyes contact with me and sighs. 'He's right, you're lucky kid, and I'm a father too.' Another moment of silence lingers as I look to my father and notice how he keeps his eyes away from me. I slowly get to my feet and breathe tiredly. I didn't understand it, why? What was he doing begging for my life and for them to release me? 'Oтец?' I wait for him to answer and the eyes watching us weigh heavily on me. 'Just go, boy. Leave.' I take another breath as I try to understand what he was saying. It was surreal and I didn't think anything like this would ever happen. 'Go, boy, leave!' I swallow the confusion and barely make a step toward the door. 'You better listen to your dad, kid, before I change my mind.' My bag is tossed to me from a tall skinny man and then suddenly my feet are at the front door and I make my way slowly outside the house. I swallow again as I take slow steps on the pavement, my head pounding in pain and my lip busted open. The silent evening making me confused, but oddly... okay. I get to go back to Rose. Then I hear it, a lone shot of a gun and I come to a stop a mile down the house of where I used to live. I close my eyes and finally am able to understand why my father had begged for my life.

**...**

The slam of a car door makes my eyes shoot open and my breath catch. I rise in the small seat and make contact with the smell of food. 'Sleeping beauty is awake...' I turn my head to face the sight of the one person I will always want to wake up to and smirk tiredly. 'I got you something to eat.' I frown at her in question of why she didn't wake me to get off with her. She shrugs and smiles sadly at me. 'I didn't want to wake you and you needed the sleep.' She hands me the bag of greasy food and I open it and begin eating. It's silent as we sit in the car and are comfortable with just being together. 'Are you okay?' I nod and take another bite of my hamburger. She reaches over and runs her thumb lightly over my injured lip. 'How's your head feeling?' I sigh and nod again. 'I'm okay, Roza, stop worrying and eat.'

She smiles at me as I lean over and capture her lips in a kiss, letting her know I'm okay. 'Where are we anyway?' She swallows her food and points to a sign next to the gas station we are parked in. 'We are in Twin Falls, Idaho. We're almost in Nevada, should we make a stop in Vegas?' She throws me a teasing smile and I shake my head in amusement. 'We just got out of all that trouble and you want to head into some more.' She laughs and finishes her burger, then leans over the middle section and kisses my cheek. 'So that's a no to Vegas?' I nod in agreement and smirk at her flirtatious look. I let a few silent minutes pass and watch as she buckles up and starts the car. I take in all her beauty and admire her and all we've done to get this far. 'I love you, Roza.' She looks to me and smiles as we begin to back out of the parking lot and make our way to our new life. A life I'm sure will have its ups and downs, but a life we'll get through; together.

**Russian Words: my love. i love you. son. dad.**

**So thats it buddies, this story is over. There will not be a sequel. However, I will most likely post one shots about these two and this story. They will be posted in 'And Other Random One Shots' my own collection of... random one shots. Also if anyone cares the chapters were named after lyrics from songs that helped me write the story. PM me if you want the songs, im always up for sharing music (:**

**I'd like to thank all of you who read, alerted, favorit-ed? and reviewed this story. I cannot explain how thankful i am and how much it means to me that you enjoyed it. I was just happy that people were reading it, so once again thank you sooooo much!**

**I am also currently working up another story and will post as soon as its ready, but while you wait for that. Please check out 'Runaway To Magic' by ladierock. Its a really interesting read and she's a good writer. So check that out if you want and support other authors, theres too much damn hating on here. **

**And once again, thanks for reading.**

**riv. (;**


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